Episode Transcript
[00:00:21] Speaker A: State line.
This is exciting.
[00:00:24] Speaker B: Guys, guys, I need you to keep your seatbelts fastened. This is already a stressful drive. I do not need there to be anything else.
[00:00:33] Speaker A: Okay, listen, but it's so funny when we slap you in the face with the little ends of our seatbelts.
[00:00:38] Speaker B: Yeah, no, it's great. It's a good bit. It was a good bit for the first half hour, but when I almost drove off the verizono, I got to be honest, I was kind of not.
[00:00:46] Speaker C: Okay, Mike, how am I supposed to do laundry with my seatbelt fastened?
[00:00:51] Speaker B: You're not. Yeah, we're in a car.
[00:00:53] Speaker A: Great. Alex?
[00:00:55] Speaker B: I don't know.
[00:00:56] Speaker C: Chris and Mike, watch those turns. The iron's hot.
[00:00:59] Speaker A: Look, he's folding a fitted sheet back here. He needs the space.
[00:01:04] Speaker B: Wait, you guys had the idea to sell the recreational vehicle? I don't understand why we don't have room. We are in a Camry.
[00:01:14] Speaker C: Yeah, a Camry.
[00:01:15] Speaker B: You mean a cam ray? I'm sorry. We're in the cam ray.
I don't understand how you thin iron.
[00:01:23] Speaker A: We put the back seats down.
[00:01:25] Speaker C: Yeah, and first of all, also, you can't blame me. We left so quickly.
[00:01:33] Speaker A: You threw us in the car as he was unloading the dryer.
[00:01:37] Speaker B: Listen, I don't know why anybody else is not excited about going. Alex is going to be a hall of fame impersonator. This is a big deal, and it's exciting.
[00:01:48] Speaker C: No, it's awesome, but I need to look my best.
[00:01:51] Speaker A: He doesn't have the costume.
That's hence the iron he needs to iron the costume.
[00:01:58] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:01:59] Speaker A: You might say that the costume is very simple and is really only one piece, but it's still.
[00:02:06] Speaker C: Yeah, I need all the cotton balls and the blue dye for the cotton.
[00:02:12] Speaker A: Balls, which does stain, by the way, and it's bad.
[00:02:16] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. Sorry, Mike, about the camera.
[00:02:19] Speaker A: Thank you for putting the lease in your name, by the way. We have terrible credit.
[00:02:25] Speaker B: Okay, I just got to say, I don't think you'd need any more cotton balls. Mike, the hair is already.
[00:02:31] Speaker A: Mike, you're in the oncoming lane. Mike, you're in the middle lane of the oncoming side.
[00:02:35] Speaker C: Mike, you got to stop, like, turning your head 180 degrees to talk to us while you're driving.
[00:02:41] Speaker B: Yeah, if I don't look at you, you won't take me seriously.
[00:02:45] Speaker A: I got news.
[00:02:46] Speaker C: You're right.
[00:02:47] Speaker A: Doesn't make a difference.
[00:02:49] Speaker B: All right, you know what? As long as we're here, we might as well just start recording, right?
[00:02:53] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, buddy. I brought the attachment to put in the cassette deck, because this is one to put in the cassette deck. That makes the audio interface work so we can record.
So just pop that in and.
[00:03:09] Speaker C: I already popped it in.
[00:03:11] Speaker A: Oh, really?
[00:03:11] Speaker B: Oh, it's already been going. It's been going.
[00:03:12] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay, good.
[00:03:14] Speaker B: Well, hello, everybody. Welcome back to everybody.
[00:03:16] Speaker A: Mike, you're driving on the opposite. Mike. Mike.
[00:03:19] Speaker B: I will do what I need to.
[00:03:22] Speaker A: Mike, we're going up the exit ramp on the other side of the road.
[00:03:26] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:03:26] Speaker B: We are entering.
[00:03:27] Speaker C: We're not exiting.
[00:03:28] Speaker B: This is our exit. This is our exit. Okay. It's quicker this way. Just trust me.
[00:03:33] Speaker C: Anyway, that man is Mike.
[00:03:36] Speaker B: I'm Mike. That's Alex. That's Adam.
[00:03:39] Speaker A: Hello.
[00:03:39] Speaker B: That's Alex.
[00:03:41] Speaker C: Hi.
[00:03:41] Speaker B: And we also have Adam down and.
What are you doing?
[00:03:48] Speaker A: I'm crawling around in the seat. Well, I dropped my contact lens.
[00:03:55] Speaker C: I need you to help me fold this.
[00:03:56] Speaker A: No one's going to buy this.
[00:03:58] Speaker B: Exciting news. We have very exciting news. Our very own mayor of Lynbrook, Alex himself, has been nominated and is going.
[00:04:09] Speaker C: Yes, honey. Oh, shit. A deer.
[00:04:13] Speaker A: Just keep going.
[00:04:15] Speaker B: He saw the headlights. He saw the headlights. That's fine.
[00:04:18] Speaker A: And didn't move.
[00:04:21] Speaker B: I thought he was.
[00:04:22] Speaker A: So he knows how he died. Anyway, you were saying?
[00:04:26] Speaker B: But anyway, our very own mayor, Alex Scheer, has been nominated and is being inducted into the impressionists hall of Fame. Not the painters, the people that do impressions. And we're on our way. I'm very excited.
[00:04:41] Speaker C: Very clear distinction.
[00:04:42] Speaker B: Yeah. No, the impressionist. That's a different thing that we're not associated with. But the other one. This is going to be exciting. We're driving on the way up here. Alex is nominated and being inducted for his world famous impersonation.
[00:04:58] Speaker A: That's right.
[00:04:59] Speaker C: Yeah. You know, it's. It's world famous. And all for the wrong reasons.
[00:05:03] Speaker A: Well, now that we're recording, I do want to say Alex. Let's leave it as a teaser for the end of the episode.
[00:05:11] Speaker C: Absolutely.
[00:05:12] Speaker A: I mean, this is hall of Fame worthy stuff, and we don't want to blow our wad too soon.
[00:05:18] Speaker C: Exactly. We can't be giving the people what they.
[00:05:20] Speaker A: Mike, watch out for that wad.
[00:05:22] Speaker B: What?
[00:05:23] Speaker C: Oh, sorry about that. That's mine.
[00:05:24] Speaker A: Big swear.
[00:05:26] Speaker C: We can't give the people what they want right away. You know why? Because this is everybody loves. Everybody loves Raymond. And that's not our style.
[00:05:33] Speaker B: This week.
[00:05:35] Speaker C: We're talking about season three, episode 19. What's it called?
[00:05:39] Speaker A: Big shots.
[00:05:41] Speaker C: Big shots.
Robert gets Ray to take him to the baseball hall of Fame to meet the 69 Mets. And then Ray embarrasses himself when he can't cut to the front of the line just because he's a reporter for Newsday. It's actually a pretty good episode. I think it was very funny. I like that it focused really just on Ray and Robert, which is something that we don't get too often, a whole episode on them.
And we're going to talk all about it throughout our usual antics of the night. So please stay tuned and stay tolerant. We're having fun.
[00:06:15] Speaker A: I think that's a good point, that it's a rare Ray and Robert episode. It's also a rare Ray and Robert episode that isn't about being brothers.
Right. The theme is more specific to each of them. Ray trying to be a big shot with his newspaper pass. And Robert trying to be a big shot with his whatever you call those things that cops hold up to show you that they're cops. Badges.
[00:06:43] Speaker B: A badge.
[00:06:43] Speaker A: Yep. I just thought that was a good approach to this episode.
[00:06:48] Speaker C: Yes. And then, of course, rule of threes. We got one more at the end, which was amazing. We'll talk about that later.
[00:06:54] Speaker B: Talk about very good hot clothes down towards the end of this thing. But, yeah, I thought this was a very fun episode. I mean, you guys know, I was very excited about this episode for different reasons.
[00:07:06] Speaker A: I had a feeling that you would like this because you're a big gene arrington fan. Right. Who played the guard that tells Ray he can't cut in line.
[00:07:16] Speaker B: Yeah, no, that's my man.
[00:07:18] Speaker C: Yeah, I heard he's going to be here today.
[00:07:20] Speaker A: Really? Who does he do an impression of?
[00:07:24] Speaker C: Security guard.
[00:07:25] Speaker A: Oh, that's good.
[00:07:26] Speaker C: That's what I've heard at know. How far are we?
[00:07:30] Speaker B: Just another.
[00:07:31] Speaker A: Yeah, we're in Connecticut, 6 hours.
[00:07:35] Speaker B: Yeah.
Wait, we're in Connecticut?
[00:07:39] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:07:39] Speaker B: We're going to Connecticut?
[00:07:41] Speaker A: No, we're going to Massachusetts.
[00:07:44] Speaker B: Then why the fuck did I go over the shit?
[00:07:48] Speaker C: God damn.
[00:07:49] Speaker B: Just. I guess I took the really wrong exit there. Wow.
[00:07:54] Speaker C: New Yorkers. Anyone who's not a New Yorker won't laugh at that.
[00:07:58] Speaker B: That's fine. That's okay. All right.
[00:08:00] Speaker A: Well, it's a circuituitous route. I thought you said something about avoiding tolls, but then you took us on a very expensive toll bridge. And then also the New Jersey.
[00:08:10] Speaker B: You got to go on, too. If you're doing the Verizon, you also got to do the goffles.
[00:08:15] Speaker A: Oh, and don't forget the Mario Cuomo to get back across the Hudson.
[00:08:19] Speaker B: Yeah. There you go.
Turnpike.
How much do we budget?
[00:08:25] Speaker C: It's its own format.
[00:08:26] Speaker A: I brought 35 cash. Alex, how much did you bring?
[00:08:35] Speaker C: Mike, how much did you bring?
[00:08:37] Speaker B: You know what? It's okay. If we just go quick enough, the cameras won't pick up our license plate.
[00:08:42] Speaker A: That's good.
I did mean to ask. The registration on this car is current, right?
[00:08:49] Speaker B: No, but I also.
[00:08:51] Speaker A: Shit. Listen, wait, let me look in the. I'm just going to poke my head. The deer broke a hole in the windshield. I'll just poke my. Oh, shit. 1298. This is really.
[00:09:02] Speaker B: Watch out for the telephone pole.
I will also point out, first of all, this is a 2001 Toyota Camry. There is no way this thing is passing inspection when I bring it in. Hence why I'm avoiding it at all times. But I will say I noted and made a note in my notebook when I was watching this episode that Raymond's registration was so far.
[00:09:29] Speaker A: Me too, because that's amazing.
[00:09:32] Speaker C: Both of us did not notice it.
[00:09:34] Speaker B: Yeah, it debuted in March 1999.
[00:09:37] Speaker A: That's right.
[00:09:38] Speaker B: And I saw the register, it said 1298. I was like, wow. You see? Is he goofed. What's he doing?
[00:09:42] Speaker C: You guys are insane. Is there anyone out there who also.
[00:09:46] Speaker A: Noticed that called being a mentalist, Alex?
[00:09:49] Speaker C: Yeah, I am basically the opposite of that.
I watch the pretty pictures and I do not notice details. You guys are insane. And I'm so glad you guys are here.
[00:10:03] Speaker B: The thing is, I think that we have watched these episodes with such detail because we know we're going to talk about them. And also, now that I'm thinking back on it, I don't think I processed this in the moment, but when you see the shot of the front dashboard on any tv show, because that's a common shot, you never see the registration date up there. It never appears. It's never 1290. You don't see the day that they have to go get it re upped. You just see the two talking heads.
[00:10:32] Speaker C: So you don't think that if he wasn't going to come up in the story, it wouldn't be there?
[00:10:39] Speaker B: I don't think I processed that.
[00:10:41] Speaker C: But yes, there are other driving episodes of everybody loves Raymond. We could check those and see if there is like the same there.
[00:10:52] Speaker A: I can tell you it's not that in driving, Frank, there is no sticker on the windshield.
[00:11:00] Speaker C: There you go. Okay. It's just for the show.
[00:11:03] Speaker A: Wow.
[00:11:05] Speaker B: Listen, give them credit.
[00:11:06] Speaker A: It feels important.
[00:11:07] Speaker B: That's called serving it up.
[00:11:09] Speaker A: This feels important, this realization. But I don't know how to explain.
[00:11:14] Speaker C: How in our two and a half hour dissection of that episode. None of us noticed or brought it up, which is amazing, actually.
But for this episode, it's probably why you guys recognized it, because you're probably so used to seeing tv show cars, windshields without it.
[00:11:31] Speaker A: That's a good point.
[00:11:32] Speaker B: I was looking up the pictures, and I got to say, I can't find anything.
[00:11:37] Speaker A: Yeah, what did you look up? And also okay with me googling. Can you put your driving right? Microsoft surface. Two down.
[00:11:47] Speaker C: It matches the camera.
[00:11:50] Speaker B: It's an update.
[00:11:51] Speaker A: It's great. That's a lot of pop ups, Mike. I'm just saying.
[00:11:57] Speaker B: Well, you see, the ad blocker is immoral.
[00:12:02] Speaker A: Well, there's not using an ad blocker. And then there's welcoming ads in with open arms.
[00:12:09] Speaker B: Yeah, I do that because I'm a capitalist. This is America, and we have to be welcoming for a cat. Correct.
[00:12:16] Speaker A: All right.
[00:12:17] Speaker C: You don't even want to be, like, the cool part of capitalism anyway.
What's this?
Give me some detail.
[00:12:25] Speaker A: Mike, stop checking out on the extends website.
[00:12:29] Speaker C: The cool part of capitalism. Mike.
[00:12:30] Speaker B: Hang on.
I got a gift.
[00:12:33] Speaker C: Mike, shut up. The cool part of capitalism using paper. Be that one guy on top of the mountain with all the money.
That's the cool part. Everyone else, suck it.
[00:12:45] Speaker A: Suck it.
No, that's not. He's not telling you what website to go to, Mike.
[00:12:50] Speaker B: Suck.
[00:12:51] Speaker A: Fold up the tab.
[00:12:52] Speaker B: Is that the hyphen or.
[00:12:53] Speaker A: It's suck.
It's an italian website.
Suck. Punto it.
[00:13:02] Speaker C: Yeah, those aren't meatballs on the front page.
[00:13:08] Speaker B: Hey, guys, we're passing Cooperstown. Wave.
[00:13:11] Speaker A: That's the title. Oh. Why are we passing Cooperstown?
Cooperstown is in northwestern New York, correct?
[00:13:19] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, we're passing through it on the way to.
We took the long route. We had to go.
[00:13:24] Speaker A: You're trying to avoid the $6 toll on the Mario Cuomo, and so we're going. Yeah, just do the bear mountain, my man. It's 125, last I checked.
[00:13:35] Speaker B: Not giving Mario another cent. I spent too much money on his games, and they make me upset.
[00:13:40] Speaker C: I don't know if he actually gets money from the toll from his bridge.
[00:13:43] Speaker A: Well, he's dead. Yeah, actually, aside from it would go to Andrew and Chris. And maybe in that case, I am in favor of avoiding the avoidance.
Okay. How much time did that add?
[00:13:59] Speaker B: About 42 seconds.
[00:14:03] Speaker A: Really?
[00:14:03] Speaker C: Oh, my God. We're never going to get there.
[00:14:05] Speaker B: We're here.
[00:14:06] Speaker C: Oh, wait. What?
[00:14:09] Speaker A: Here? Here?
[00:14:10] Speaker B: Yeah. No, yeah, I took a shortcut.
[00:14:14] Speaker C: What shortcut?
[00:14:15] Speaker B: The impressionist hall of Fame is right over there, Mike.
[00:14:18] Speaker C: Five minutes ago you said we were.
[00:14:19] Speaker A: 6 hours away, Mike.
[00:14:21] Speaker B: Yeah, and then I put my foot on the gas and moved it.
[00:14:26] Speaker C: Delorean us over there.
[00:14:28] Speaker B: No, I just went fast.
[00:14:29] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:14:31] Speaker A: This is the american impressionist hall of fame. Not the impressionist hall of fame of the Americas. Right.
[00:14:41] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:14:41] Speaker C: These are the painters. You went the wrong way.
[00:14:44] Speaker B: Yeah, I think I did.
[00:14:47] Speaker A: Let's get back in the.
[00:14:49] Speaker C: Wait, maybe. Wait. Let's go in first. Maybe these guys can paint me yellow.
[00:14:53] Speaker A: Yeah, perfect. Because Mike also kind of need an oil change. The spray gun got a little jammed, so. I mean, new interior plus.
But we're out of yellow, so. Yeah.
[00:15:07] Speaker B: You did what to my interior?
[00:15:11] Speaker A: My spray gun malfunctioned and now your interior is yellow.
[00:15:15] Speaker B: All right, that's gross.
[00:15:19] Speaker A: Yeah. All right, let's go in. Let's see if these guys can paint you. Because most artists. Right, Alex, you would know they work equally as well on paper and body.
[00:15:32] Speaker C: Body paint is a thing, man. You just need the right kind of.
[00:15:35] Speaker A: Okay, let's.
[00:15:37] Speaker C: If these guys don't, then it's fine. I'll just be yellow forever.
[00:15:41] Speaker B: I'll work on changing this oil. I'll see you guys later.
[00:15:43] Speaker A: Okay, let's go in.
Looks like they open at three and it is 301. Let's barge right in. Hello?
[00:15:53] Speaker C: First customers.
[00:15:54] Speaker B: Hey.
[00:15:54] Speaker C: Anyone here? We need some help.
[00:15:57] Speaker A: Hi. We're here to see the art. And also we need.
[00:16:03] Speaker B: Sacred. What are you doing in my.
[00:16:07] Speaker C: No, not sacred blue. Sacred yellow. Please.
[00:16:10] Speaker A: He'd like you to.
Hello, we're from Limbrook on Long island. And we are on our way to the impressionists hall of fame. Sorry, the american impressionist.
[00:16:26] Speaker B: That's up in Massachusetts, right?
[00:16:27] Speaker A: This is Massachusetts.
And we were just.
Yeah, no, we know. Our friend took a detour, but we just wanted to pop in here a. To see the wonderful works of art and maybe support the museum. And also, can you paint my friend yellow?
[00:16:45] Speaker C: It's very important for a specific character that I'm going to. Wait a minute. Did Mike say he was doing an oil change? Just like out here alone?
[00:16:53] Speaker A: Just in the parking lot?
That's going to lead to me either.
[00:17:00] Speaker C: What the fuck is he going to. Does he have oil?
[00:17:05] Speaker B: Hang on.
[00:17:05] Speaker C: Do you guys have oil paints?
[00:17:08] Speaker B: Yes, of course.
[00:17:10] Speaker C: Yeah, we'll take a bucket of that, I guess.
[00:17:12] Speaker A: Yeah, we'll bring that out.
[00:17:13] Speaker C: Make it yellow.
[00:17:13] Speaker B: Here, I'll just. We are giving people a complimentary bucket of paint as they walk into the museum.
[00:17:21] Speaker A: Wow, that's convenient. How convenient, indeed. Alex, I'm just going to run this out to Mike and make sure he's okay.
[00:17:29] Speaker C: I'll learn more about this interesting character here. What's your name, friend?
Tell me. Doug. Do you know a show called Doug? Okay, yeah, no, doge got it like the coin.
Do you know of a show called Everybody loves Raymond?
[00:17:50] Speaker B: I love that show.
[00:17:52] Speaker C: Oh, wow. What a big.
You know, I do a podcast on that show. Actually, you're on it right now. Thanks for signing that liability waiver in silence.
[00:18:02] Speaker B: When did I say that?
[00:18:03] Speaker C: Anyway, the question I have for you.
[00:18:07] Speaker B: It is three old to a penny on my shit. This is too much.
[00:18:11] Speaker C: I know. So let's talk about.
You're obviously some kind of nationality, and.
[00:18:21] Speaker B: You probably think I'm pretty clearly french. Am I wrong?
[00:18:28] Speaker C: Don't underestimate my tenacity of not knowing where people are from.
[00:18:32] Speaker B: I'm wearing a shirt that says the french flag. It says, france is good. I mean, I think this is pretty.
[00:18:39] Speaker A: Flashback for a second.
So, Ronald, we are going to need you to go pretty deep undercover for this.
[00:18:48] Speaker B: Undercover you're talking.
[00:18:49] Speaker A: I'm talking about you're going to have to change everything about you.
There's this.
[00:18:54] Speaker B: Everything?
[00:18:55] Speaker A: Yes. There's a group of art collectors coming in from South America who are supposedly bringing priceless works of south american impressionist art to the north american impressionist Art museum. We don't think those crates are going to be full of paintings. Let's just.
[00:19:16] Speaker B: You. I think I got you. I think you're picking up what you're putting down.
[00:19:18] Speaker A: So why don't you spin the wheel and we'll see where we go. We'll pull out the wardrobe racks and see what we get.
[00:19:28] Speaker B: Clearly french. I don't know what you are talking about.
[00:19:31] Speaker C: Anyway, so about this episode.
I really liked it. Season three, episode 19, the one I'm sure you've seen recently.
[00:19:42] Speaker B: Oh, this is the one when they go to Cooperstown, right?
[00:19:44] Speaker C: Yeah, but before they go to Cooperstown, they have a whole scene in the beginning that's weirdly super.
How did Adam say? Scared? Scared straight.
[00:19:58] Speaker A: Gay panic.
[00:19:59] Speaker C: Gay panic.
[00:20:00] Speaker A: Can we cut outside for a second? We see Mike laying underneath the Camry, working on the car. And of course, because he likes to listen to music while he works. Swan Lake is blasting as a truck pulls up. Hey, hold on. I got to climb down from here.
What the hell are you playing, son?
[00:20:25] Speaker B: That's Swan Lake.
[00:20:27] Speaker A: Swan Lake.
I'm going to go ahead and turn that off, okay? We don't want any of that kind of stuff around here.
[00:20:36] Speaker B: You don't like Swan Lake. I've never met anybody that doesn't like Swan Lake.
[00:20:40] Speaker A: Listen, man, if that played for a couple more minutes, I'm a Little worried it might have took.
[00:20:47] Speaker B: Might have took you where?
[00:20:49] Speaker A: Let's just say to a place I definitely don't want to go.
[00:20:55] Speaker B: Look, guys, it's 2024. We don't care about if it's russian or not. The cold war is over. Henry, is this fellow bothering you?
[00:21:06] Speaker A: This guy's playing Swan Lake.
[00:21:07] Speaker C: Darryl, don't worry, baby. We'll go home and we'll just ignore the Swan lake.
[00:21:13] Speaker B: I love.
[00:21:13] Speaker A: Thank you. I was getting my friend. Thank you so much.
[00:21:16] Speaker C: This is my inconspicuous life.
[00:21:21] Speaker A: Been together. I know you just got out of the coma, baby, but you can say it now.
Husband.
[00:21:28] Speaker C: Husband.
[00:21:30] Speaker A: This is Darryl, my husband. He has been in a coma since May of 2015.
[00:21:41] Speaker C: Apparently, the world's real changed since then.
[00:21:44] Speaker A: But one thing that hasn't changed is we love each other and hate Russia.
[00:21:51] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:21:51] Speaker B: So, can I go back to changing the oil on my car now? Do you have anything that we wanted to.
I mean, you guys seem like lovely characters, but I guess I could turn the music down. Is that what.
[00:22:04] Speaker A: How about off a and b?
[00:22:07] Speaker B: But I'm right?
[00:22:08] Speaker C: Okay, look, join us for dinner.
[00:22:11] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:22:12] Speaker B: What?
[00:22:13] Speaker A: Come and join us for dinner, and we'll explain to you why you can't go playing russian ballet music here in.
[00:22:22] Speaker C: Connecticut, we don't take to your kind.
[00:22:26] Speaker A: You've been doing this entirely wrong. Let me just. There you go. Tighten that bolt, and it should work fine. Why don't you follow us?
You know what? Actually, here's the address. We'll follow you.
[00:22:40] Speaker B: You guys are being very aggressive in your hospitality. I appreciate it.
[00:22:50] Speaker A: Come on, let's go. And here, listen to this.
[00:22:53] Speaker B: They'll take a.
[00:22:55] Speaker A: On your way. Why don't you listen to this? This is a little bit of american ballet.
[00:23:01] Speaker C: It's Taylor Swift.
[00:23:03] Speaker A: That's right.
He wasn't out there. I guess maybe he went to, like, a jiffy Lube or something, realized he couldn't do it.
[00:23:12] Speaker C: All right, what do you learn? Anyway, Doug was talking about how he doesn't see anything wrong with the first couple minutes of this episode.
[00:23:21] Speaker A: Oh, interesting.
[00:23:23] Speaker B: I like boxing.
[00:23:25] Speaker A: Yeah. Have you ever been in, sir?
[00:23:27] Speaker B: I have not.
[00:23:30] Speaker A: Would you like to be?
[00:23:31] Speaker B: No. I have been told by many people that I have, how you say, punchable face. So I would like to stay away from boss.
I thought the kids doing the tiptoe was quite funny.
[00:23:46] Speaker C: That was cute.
[00:23:47] Speaker A: Yeah.
On the whole, I don't know if you covered this. Ray Frank, gay panic counter programming discussion.
What side are you on? Alex, just to get on the record here, I'm on Deborah's side.
[00:24:02] Speaker C: I'm also on Deborah's side. Not necessarily know, it's just know. Let kids watch what they want to watch and do not stand up.
[00:24:13] Speaker B: Are you talking about shut up? It's cruelling in your man.
[00:24:16] Speaker C: Shut up, Doug.
[00:24:17] Speaker B: They had to put Barbie in it.
[00:24:19] Speaker C: Well, anyway. No, it's like that famous saying, if you try to stand in the way of the person your kid is going to become, you're just going to separate yourself and the kid, and the kid's just going to become that person anyway.
[00:24:34] Speaker B: Again, I can't emphasize enough, there is no five year old that wants to watch Swan Lake. It doesn't exist. It was Deborah's doing.
[00:24:44] Speaker C: I mean, I do hear Swan Lake's not particularly super interesting to people who are not, like, deep in the ballet circle.
[00:24:51] Speaker A: Well, also, I think let's plot out the sequence of events. I think Deborah put it on and the kids reacted positively to it. I don't imagine there was a scenario where the very young twins were saying, we heard about Swan Lake. Do you think you could run down to blockbuster and get us a video of.
[00:25:13] Speaker C: I mean. Yeah, it was definitely something that was on. They probably got entranced by it.
[00:25:17] Speaker A: Entranced is a good word.
[00:25:19] Speaker C: Yeah. And then know started copying the screen, doing, like, the little vocabulary.
[00:25:27] Speaker B: He's got a good word.
[00:25:28] Speaker C: No, there's nothing wrong with that. And that's cool. And I support it. Yeah.
[00:25:33] Speaker A: As a hall of fame proprietor, how do you feel about the disrespect Marie in that scene? Put on the baseball hall of Fame by referring to it as the hall of baseballs.
[00:25:47] Speaker B: I love that. Satisfy? No, the hall of Fame is sacred. I mean, be it baseball or be it basketball or be it football, or be it.
[00:25:57] Speaker A: What, this?
[00:25:57] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, painting. It could be any of that either.
[00:26:01] Speaker A: Can you name any american impressionists?
[00:26:08] Speaker B: OJ Simpson, probably at some point.
[00:26:11] Speaker A: What?
[00:26:12] Speaker C: I'm sorry.
[00:26:13] Speaker B: He's a hall of fame running back.
[00:26:35] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:26:36] Speaker B: Which I think is great. They put the Monet section right next to Peyton Madden. All right, that was a bad example.
[00:26:47] Speaker A: So what do you think about yellow or not painting him yellow?
[00:26:50] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, we could do that.
[00:26:52] Speaker C: Okay, thanks.
[00:26:53] Speaker A: So this is what we call the front room. And this is more for entertaining. And then we have the tv in the den.
[00:27:02] Speaker C: Not to mention.
[00:27:04] Speaker B: Listen, you guys are cool.
Listen, I like being pseudo abducted by two maritally engaged, vaguely threatening truckers we.
[00:27:21] Speaker C: Are married, not engaged.
[00:27:23] Speaker A: We were engaged. He went into the coma. He came out, woke up married.
[00:27:29] Speaker B: Think one of the very important parts of the marriage ceremony is the exchanging of consent. I don't know if you can do that. The coma.
[00:27:35] Speaker A: We were engaged, he said. I fell, collapsed, went into the coma. At some point under the coma, he went.
Questions?
[00:27:53] Speaker C: No need.
[00:27:54] Speaker B: But I don't really care about to dive too deep into it. But anyway, I just.
[00:27:59] Speaker A: You want to know the reason we hate Russia and all russian cultural institutions?
[00:28:05] Speaker B: I kind of picked up on the fact that you're just Americans that didn't realize the cold war ended or.
[00:28:09] Speaker C: Tell them, honey.
[00:28:11] Speaker A: The year was 1989. 89. I was standing in East Berlin, East Berlin. My hubby over there was standing in West Berlin, West Berlin. And I saw him through checkpoint Charlie.
[00:28:31] Speaker C: And my compass pointed east, if you know what I'm saying.
[00:28:35] Speaker A: He was doing this dance that you would not believe.
And I cursed Mr. Gorbachev that day.
Now, luckily, David Hasselhoff came round and knocked the wall down. That's true. So I was eventually to be united with my cross border lover.
But before that, we had many years of looking for small holes in the wall.
[00:29:05] Speaker B: So you guys are.
[00:29:08] Speaker C: You could read about it in our memoir, the glorious hole.
[00:29:16] Speaker A: I was a spy for the CIA in East. I was a tourist, and he was a tourist in West Berlin, trapped over there.
What happened was the airline canceled his flight and forgot to rebook him. This was before Expedia and priceline and all that.
[00:29:38] Speaker B: I'm picking up on that.
[00:29:40] Speaker A: Do you wonder why we're southern as well and we live in Connecticut?
[00:29:45] Speaker C: Let's not elaborate on that.
[00:29:47] Speaker A: So his flight got canceled, and next thing you know, I'm getting stones. I'm getting my hand all cut know drilling these. There's no other word for him than glory holes in the Berlin wall just so I could be with him.
And if you go to Berlin today, there are still sections, know, there's graffiti on that section of the wall now, but you can still find the hole and it still works. Believe us. Believe us.
[00:30:19] Speaker C: Okay, hang on. I'm adding glory hole in the Berlin wall to my list of cool band name ideas.
[00:30:28] Speaker A: I really. Look, one of these days, you're going to pick up that bass and you're going to rock the world, Daryl. I know it. You just got to find the confidence. You got the.
[00:30:38] Speaker C: Give me that confidence every day. Henry, I think your name was.
[00:30:43] Speaker A: I don't remember.
[00:30:44] Speaker C: Me neither. And I don't need to. When I look into those eyes, now.
[00:30:50] Speaker A: What'D you say your name was? Mac?
[00:30:51] Speaker B: I don't believe I did, but, yes.
[00:30:54] Speaker C: This is all right, Mac.
[00:30:56] Speaker A: Mike. Mike, G. That doesn't stand for Gorbachev, now.
[00:31:00] Speaker B: Does not. Not this. G. It stands for Jamaica.
[00:31:05] Speaker A: Okay?
That's where we went on our honeymoon.
[00:31:08] Speaker C: Oh, what?
[00:31:10] Speaker B: Jamaica with A-G-I think.
[00:31:14] Speaker A: Okay, listen, Mac, when we were going through your stuff and we found some good stuff, we found this.
[00:31:24] Speaker B: How did you.
[00:31:26] Speaker C: I found a bucket of old oil in your car.
[00:31:29] Speaker B: Guys.
[00:31:30] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:31:31] Speaker B: I'm not gonna lie to you. I've never been more scared shitless than I am in this exact moment.
This is a lot.
[00:31:40] Speaker A: There's a lot of information to process all at once.
[00:31:44] Speaker B: This is a lot for me, I think. I don't know. Listen, I was changing the oil on my car.
[00:31:50] Speaker A: You absolutely were not. You might have thought you were, but that is not what you were doing, son.
[00:31:55] Speaker B: That's what I was doing. And you guys threatened to kill me, abducted me, or if we defeated me.
[00:32:01] Speaker A: We directly threatened you.
I don't know if we directly threatened you.
[00:32:07] Speaker C: Implant.
[00:32:08] Speaker A: We menaced you for sure.
[00:32:10] Speaker B: You very much, perhaps. I genuinely don't think I've asked a single question to you guys yet.
[00:32:19] Speaker A: You're saying we've just been freely offering this information to you ever since we pulled up on you in the parking lot?
[00:32:26] Speaker B: That is 100% correct. You said, turn down the music, and then I did. And from then on, I didn't have anything to.
[00:32:34] Speaker A: It's just been straight exposition about our characters.
Well, listen, when I was going through your stuff, found a lot of good stuff. Found some garbage, threw it away. Social Security card.
[00:32:48] Speaker B: Don't do that. I need that one.
[00:32:51] Speaker A: But I also found this. Really? I don't know what you would call this, Darryl. A screed, a manifesto about the 1969 Mets.
[00:33:02] Speaker C: A collection of words.
[00:33:04] Speaker B: I got a lot to say about that.
[00:33:05] Speaker A: Got this wet old mead notebook, narrow or wide? Ruled, full of information about the New York Mets. What is this about? What is this?
[00:33:17] Speaker C: I've always wanted to meet the Mets. Meet the Mets.
[00:33:20] Speaker B: Meet the Mets.
[00:33:22] Speaker A: I've always wanted to see them sock those balls over in those home runs. Can I show you this website?
[00:33:31] Speaker B: Is it sock it?
I've been there before.
[00:33:34] Speaker A: Oh, cool.
[00:33:36] Speaker C: Never mind, then.
[00:33:37] Speaker A: Never mind.
Here, I'll just airdrop you the link there.
[00:33:41] Speaker B: Oh, no, you don't even need to do that. Actually, again, I didn't ask for that. I appreciate it, but I don't need that one. Hey, listen, guys, have you ever seen the show everybody loves?
[00:33:53] Speaker A: We actually the whole reason we got Peacock was to watch everybody loves Raymond.
[00:33:59] Speaker C: I got peacock.
[00:34:00] Speaker A: Well, you thought it was something else.
[00:34:02] Speaker C: Yeah, pee and cock.
[00:34:06] Speaker A: We're into some pretty kinky. Know, we were in Germany for a.
[00:34:17] Speaker B: So.
[00:34:17] Speaker A: Yeah, we've seen. We've been working our way through everybody loves Raymond. We've been watching about one a week since 65 weeks ago.
[00:34:26] Speaker B: Oh, wow. That's a very specific amount. Have you guys seen season three, episode 19?
[00:34:31] Speaker A: Actually, yeah. That's the last one we watched called the big shot.
[00:34:34] Speaker C: Where?
Yesterday.
[00:34:36] Speaker B: So you do have some exposure to the 1969 Metropolitans.
[00:34:41] Speaker A: Oh, these are the same men that were. Oh, yeah, look at that. Tommy Ag, Jerry Grote, Bud Harrelson, Cleon Jones, Ed Crane, Pool, tug McGraw, which, again, Daryl thought was something else. And Art chamsky, and, of course, Ron Swaboda.
[00:34:59] Speaker B: Yeah, they were all there. It was great. It was actually really freaking cool to see them all there, man. I have so much to say.
[00:35:05] Speaker A: I can see. Yeah. Here, why don't we all sit down in the front room?
[00:35:10] Speaker C: We'll let you leave if you give us some Mets facts.
[00:35:13] Speaker A: Yeah, here, have some UTs party mix.
[00:35:17] Speaker B: Okay, thank you.
Actually, I do want to ask, before I begin, the head on the wall over there, that is almost a deer, but clearly not a deer.
[00:35:28] Speaker C: Don't worry about it. Eat your watered down skittles.
[00:35:34] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:35:37] Speaker A: I did call it Utz party mix, but that is just the containers. It is Skittles in water. I was hoping you wouldn't notice, but I did.
[00:35:46] Speaker B: This is the worst cereal I've ever had in my life.
[00:35:48] Speaker A: It's generous to call it a cereal, but I appreciate that.
[00:35:53] Speaker B: It's a grain floating in liquid. That's a cereal.
[00:35:57] Speaker A: Skittles. Skittles to you are a grain.
[00:36:01] Speaker B: Yeah, you can make Skittles bread. Yeah, that counts.
[00:36:04] Speaker A: All right, sit down and tell us about the fucking Mets.
[00:36:07] Speaker B: Okay, so, 1969, New York, and if.
[00:36:09] Speaker C: You mention Russia, I will punch you in the nuts.
[00:36:15] Speaker B: I don't see how Russia would come up during the. During the.
[00:36:20] Speaker A: Let's see.
[00:36:21] Speaker C: I want to see you try.
[00:36:22] Speaker B: Grandpa, I'm not that old.
[00:36:25] Speaker A: Okay, older than us.
I'm 42 and he's 43.
But same year in high school, we worked it out in one of our long, late night talks.
[00:36:39] Speaker C: I think we're getting a little too expositiony on our characters again, honey.
[00:36:45] Speaker A: All right, tell us about the fucking Mets.
[00:36:48] Speaker B: All right, so the fucking Mets. These Mets. Okay, so the Mets started in 1962 as an expansion team, right? Everyone with me, expansion baseball team, 1962.
[00:36:58] Speaker A: You know what expanded the Soviet Union sure did.
[00:37:04] Speaker B: And then it shrunk.
[00:37:06] Speaker A: I'm gripping my armchair.
[00:37:09] Speaker B: You don't need to do that. But anyway, okay, so they were very bad during the first few years. Like the Mets are always historically bad. These Mets were bad.
I don't believe they had been over 500 after the 7th game of the season at all up to this point.
And that's terrible. That was absolutely terrible. Then 1969 came around. They had a normal terrible start to the year, and then they turned it around. They became the miracle Nets and they erased at that point. The record has been topped since, but at that point, it was, I believe, the biggest deficit to playoff team in MLB history.
They made the World Series. They won the World Series. And these guys were a part of the first group to ever win the World Series for the New York Mets in what would be a long and one other time career for the New York Mets. They've only ever won twice.
[00:38:12] Speaker C: Wow.
[00:38:12] Speaker B: 69. Nice. And 1986.
[00:38:16] Speaker A: That's dangerously close to 1989.
[00:38:21] Speaker C: That's a year.
[00:38:22] Speaker B: 1989 is such an important year for you two in particular that I don't understand why you're upset with me for bringing up a year not even. That's kind of close to 1989. First. You met in 1989. The Berlin Wall fell in 1989. It was November in 1989, which also, I believe, is also when Taylor Swift was born, which you also mentioned as american ballet. So I think this is a pretty big year for you guys.
[00:38:50] Speaker C: Fair enough.
[00:38:51] Speaker A: You seem to have us all figured out.
[00:38:54] Speaker B: I do. Because you told me everything.
But, yeah, fun fact. Tug McGraw, pitcher, who is the one that talked with Ray Barone.
Great guy. Father of country music artist Tim McGraw. Interesting.
He is the person that Tim McGraw's hit song live like you were dying. You know that song?
[00:39:19] Speaker A: Of course. It's american.
[00:39:22] Speaker B: Yes, it's a great song.
[00:39:23] Speaker A: Does not mention Russia as far as I can recall.
[00:39:26] Speaker B: It does not at all. It talks about bull riding and Rocky Mountain climbing to very rocky four. Rocky four. He beat him.
[00:39:35] Speaker A: He did.
Me and Daryl were in the cineplex, on our feet, cheering when Rocky punched that russian bastard to the ground, jumping.
[00:39:47] Speaker C: Up and down, celebrating and singing and kissing each other on our faces.
[00:39:54] Speaker B: That played well in a movie theater. That was shown Rocky.
[00:39:58] Speaker C: It was dark.
[00:39:58] Speaker A: It was a. What do you call those?
Second run.
[00:40:06] Speaker B: Oh, okay.
But yeah, the song live like you were dying is about Tug McGraw because Tug McGraw was diagnosed with a horrible illness that ended up killing him.
It's a real tear jerk Roma song, but it's a great one.
[00:40:23] Speaker C: That should not be funny.
[00:40:24] Speaker A: That's horrible.
[00:40:29] Speaker B: It's a great song.
[00:40:30] Speaker C: It's a classic.
[00:40:31] Speaker A: Imagine. It is.
Can I ask you about that scene? Oh, unless you have more fun facts about the 69 Mets.
[00:40:38] Speaker B: Oh, I just really like Ed Cranepool, who recently had his number retired. Actually.
[00:40:43] Speaker A: What was his number? Don't say 89.
[00:40:46] Speaker B: It was not 89. I believe it was 19. Let me double check that.
[00:40:49] Speaker A: Which is the first half of 1989, if I'm not mistaken.
[00:40:52] Speaker C: Was it retired because of him?
[00:40:54] Speaker B: Ed Cranpool? Yes, he is one of the great Mets, which is hilarious because, yes, he's a good met. He was a good met, but he wasn't like, so how do I put this? He is one of the all time great Mets, on the one hand. But on the other hand, compared to like, the Yankees, who was. Oh, no, I'm sorry, he was number seven. Who was number 19? Was that Darryl Strawberry? Anyway, he was number seven. His number was retired. You look at him and then the Yankees number seven, who was retired was Mickey Mantle. And there is a world of difference between Ed Cranepool and Mickey Mantle. If you want to know more about Ed Cranepool, listen to Don Legreca's rant about Ed Cranepool. It's a great bit.
[00:41:40] Speaker A: Where does he. Just doing it in the town square.
[00:41:44] Speaker B: Ed Crimp.
[00:41:45] Speaker A: No, this rant.
[00:41:48] Speaker B: Don Legreka, the rant. You guys, listen, Don Lagreca is a radio host, he's a sportscaster radio host.
[00:41:54] Speaker A: And he does this rant every day on the radio.
[00:41:57] Speaker B: No, it's on YouTube. If you ever hazard your way onto YouTube, Tom Licker goes on a great rant about how the Mets don't have any great players that are actually homegrown Mets. Because the only one that he can think of is Ed Cranepool. And we love Ed Cranepool, but he wasn't that good of a player.
[00:42:16] Speaker A: I suppose we could find that, link it in the description. You said you're recording this?
[00:42:25] Speaker B: Yeah. You can talk right to the lapel here.
[00:42:28] Speaker A: Yeah, we can link it in the description of the episode.
[00:42:31] Speaker B: Too close there, Henry.
[00:42:33] Speaker C: Hi, mom. I'm on tv.
[00:42:35] Speaker B: Guys.
[00:42:35] Speaker A: Is this going to be on peacock?
[00:42:38] Speaker B: I don't. You guys, there's a thing called personal space here. Guys.
[00:42:45] Speaker C: Oh, I love you, honey. Is this the asthma they'd been talking about?
[00:42:51] Speaker A: Baby, you just gave me the asthma right there.
[00:42:55] Speaker B: All right, guys, you need to get off.
[00:42:56] Speaker A: Let's go in the backyard. Okay, fine. We're going to go and look, you stay here, enjoy your skittles. We're going to go in the backyard. We got a little wall out there.
[00:43:06] Speaker C: Yes. Relax by the unlocked door.
[00:43:09] Speaker A: Sorry. I did have a question about the episode, and then. Yeah, we got stuff to do.
Not a question. The man who recognizes Ray in line is Dwayne Gardner, who was in Medea's class reunion and the fight and temptations and other things.
[00:43:31] Speaker B: The little Richard know about this man?
[00:43:33] Speaker A: Because I was in the little Richard tv movie, too. He was the sequel, and he gave me some pointers about how to play. I took over his role as sailor.
The man who Ray instructs Robert to play 20 questions with is John Fairley, who was in a movie called Colobos. Yeah. A girl savagely slashed and battered lies in a pool of her own blood. So that's pretty. We saw that in Germany, but it was a different vibe.
And then finally, the man who calls out Ray for being a cutter is Harry Friedman, who was only in this.
I don't know if this is a tv show or a movie.
In a movie called Storm, two college kids on a survival weekend in the wilderness cross paths with three desperate killers in what turns into a fight.
[00:44:32] Speaker B: For know, Henry, you know a lot about. Very, very. About the extras in movies, which is really cool. You should really meet my friend Adam. He would know a lot. He would have a lot of conversation with you about these people.
[00:44:45] Speaker A: I don't know. Sounds russian.
[00:44:48] Speaker C: Honey, did you not, or did you have a question for Mike?
[00:44:51] Speaker A: Did I.
Have you ever tried to gain access to an area where you do not strictly know if you pretend to belong somewhere? A lot of times you can get somewhere. Sort of the way that Ray was trying to cut the line with his press.
[00:45:07] Speaker B: Yeah, but he did it all wrong. The move is you put on a brown hat and a brown jacket and grab an empty cardboard box. You can get into the Pentagon in that get up. It doesn't matter.
It's fantastic.
[00:45:20] Speaker A: Have you been in the Pentagon?
[00:45:24] Speaker B: Yeah. You haven't?
[00:45:26] Speaker C: Not yet.
[00:45:28] Speaker A: Hey, Diane, do you know that guy?
[00:45:32] Speaker C: The box guy?
[00:45:33] Speaker A: Yeah. Is he looking for a package?
He's looking for a package, but he's holding a box.
[00:45:41] Speaker C: He's in the Pentagon, so he must be important.
[00:45:44] Speaker A: He must belong here, right?
[00:45:46] Speaker C: Yeah, I guess he's supposed to be. Okay, come here. I'll swipe you in.
[00:45:50] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:45:50] Speaker B: Thanks, Diane. I appreciate you. Could you tell me this package is specifically addressed to the location of the secret military bases in Iraq? Can you direct me to that office?
[00:46:02] Speaker A: That is a lot of white powder in that box, sir.
[00:46:06] Speaker B: Don't worry about it.
[00:46:07] Speaker A: Are you sending.
[00:46:09] Speaker B: Yeah, that's it.
[00:46:11] Speaker A: He knows.
[00:46:11] Speaker B: Well, I'm not sending nothing.
[00:46:12] Speaker A: Well, I mean, Diane, if he knows your name, he must be trustworthy.
[00:46:16] Speaker C: Yeah, I guess.
It's amazing. He knows it better than I did. I went through my whole life thinking my name was Phyllis, but I guess. No, he's right.
[00:46:26] Speaker A: Wait.
[00:46:26] Speaker C: I guess my name is Diane.
[00:46:28] Speaker A: Diane. I gave up a daughter in 1961 named Phyllis.
[00:46:35] Speaker C: I gave up a mother in 1961.
[00:46:37] Speaker A: Computer named. Well, I guess you wouldn't know.
[00:46:41] Speaker C: No, I was a babe.
[00:46:43] Speaker A: Does Barbara ring any bells?
[00:46:46] Speaker C: Streisand.
[00:46:47] Speaker A: That's right.
[00:46:48] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Bob.
[00:46:51] Speaker A: My baby.
[00:46:52] Speaker B: Yeah. Got some pretty good secrets there. It was great.
[00:46:56] Speaker C: Cool.
[00:46:57] Speaker A: We're going to go outside and do what we were going to do.
[00:47:00] Speaker C: You should sit here and not leave. The door is unlocked and the windows open.
[00:47:05] Speaker A: We'll make dinner after we're done.
I guess you live here now. I mean.
[00:47:11] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:47:11] Speaker B: I don't.
[00:47:12] Speaker C: Goodbye. See you in five minutes.
[00:47:14] Speaker A: Love you.
[00:47:15] Speaker B: Hey, I just want to change.
[00:47:17] Speaker C: The keys are on the door thing right there.
[00:47:20] Speaker B: I'm going to go.
[00:47:21] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:47:22] Speaker A: I don't know, Alex. Do you think he's. It's been a while. Is he going to come back?
[00:47:27] Speaker C: I'm sorry. I'm too busy admiring all of my Margie yellow.
[00:47:31] Speaker A: You're very yellow. I mean, the coverage. Did he make sure to leave a little patch of skin unpainted so that you don't suffocate like that gold member lady?
[00:47:41] Speaker C: Oh, should he have. I'm sure it'll be fine.
[00:47:45] Speaker A: Yeah.
Well.
[00:47:49] Speaker B: Oh, look, here he comes.
This is great. God, is the yellow paper.
[00:47:55] Speaker C: Yeah, we kind of sound like an impressionist.
[00:47:59] Speaker A: We're kind of done with you.
We're just waiting for our friend.
[00:48:04] Speaker C: Yeah, go back inside, please.
Yeah. Oh, look, it looks like you got a shipment from a south american company over there. You should go deal with that.
We're going to go.
[00:48:18] Speaker A: Yeah, our friend is waiting over there. So we're just going to run across the parking lot.
[00:48:24] Speaker C: Yeah. Thanks for the paint, man. It was interesting to interact with you. Goodbye.
[00:48:32] Speaker B: We're making a trade of.
[00:48:34] Speaker A: I've got a delivery for the impressionist museum.
[00:48:40] Speaker B: That is me.
[00:48:41] Speaker A: Okay. Now, I'm going to need you to sign for it. And you can't let this out of your sight.
[00:48:48] Speaker B: Gay. I don't understand why, but. Sure, I hear you. Go.
[00:48:51] Speaker A: Okay.
Some fellas are going to be by later. Here's the. Put this shipping label on it. Some fellas are going to be by later to pick it up, if you know what I mean.
[00:49:02] Speaker B: You seem like a lot of instructor.
[00:49:04] Speaker A: No, it's pretty simple. You put the label on the thing and some guys are going to be by to pick it up.
[00:49:08] Speaker B: All right, hold on.
This doesn't track for me, but I don't understand why you just don't bring it to the guys.
[00:49:17] Speaker A: Let's just say these are the kind of guys who don't like to receive deliveries at their address.
Maybe they don't want to sign for something.
[00:49:29] Speaker B: Oh, I understand. Okay. Here you go. I signed.
[00:49:33] Speaker A: Okay. Now, you're going to get an email in a couple of minutes asking you to fill out a short survey on fedEx.com.
It would help me a lot.
[00:49:52] Speaker C: Mike, over here.
[00:49:53] Speaker A: Christ. Mike, where did you go?
The car sounds terrible. Oh, my God.
[00:50:00] Speaker B: Well, I turned in for a truck. Here you go.
[00:50:03] Speaker A: What? Oh, yeah, you're right. This is different.
[00:50:06] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:50:07] Speaker C: Whose truck is this?
[00:50:08] Speaker A: Where'd you get this?
Is this a zip a?
[00:50:12] Speaker B: I met a gay couple that was.
[00:50:14] Speaker A: German, but also how it's relevant that they're gay.
[00:50:18] Speaker B: I need you to get the full picture, actually, I don't know, Adam.
[00:50:23] Speaker C: Maybe they made it, like, a huge part of their personality.
[00:50:26] Speaker B: You don't know. They kind of.
The only thing that one of them talked about. One of them talked about everything else. The other guy just wanted to kiss. It was kind of a lot.
[00:50:37] Speaker A: That sounds beautiful.
Let me ask you a question.
Two questions, actually. How much further to the actual place that we're going? The Impressionist hall of Fame. Not the hall of Fame of american impressionists.
[00:50:54] Speaker B: 43 seconds.
[00:50:56] Speaker A: Okay. Again, I don't know how you're exactly doing this, but I'm trusting you.
[00:51:02] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:51:03] Speaker A: Other question.
When you have hot wings, do you need a dipping sauce?
[00:51:11] Speaker C: I have an issue with.
[00:51:12] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:51:12] Speaker B: Oh, yeah.
[00:51:13] Speaker A: Here. I'm going to climb into the bed and just. I'm tired. I'm going to lay down, but I'm listening.
[00:51:20] Speaker B: I go blue cheese, and you see the truck leaves streaks behind it. Yeah, no, I go blue cheese. I could go ranch, but I need something. I can't just go, especially if it's a. Well, if it's a dry rub. That's the only time that I don't, because I feel like a dry rub. You start dipping in the dipping sauce, you lose the rub. It's a different kind of beast.
[00:51:42] Speaker C: Mike. The wings have sauce on them. You don't need additional sauce.
[00:51:48] Speaker B: But when you're eating buffalo wings, it's not unusual to want ranch or blue cheese with.
[00:51:54] Speaker A: Incorrect.
It's not unusual to be loved by anyone, but you don't do that either.
[00:52:01] Speaker B: The truck comes to a screeching halt. Get out. Come on.
[00:52:06] Speaker A: That's not the worst one we've ever.
[00:52:08] Speaker B: Get out. We're 23 seconds away from our destination. You're going to have to fucking walk.
[00:52:13] Speaker A: Fine, I'll hitchhike.
[00:52:15] Speaker B: All right.
[00:52:16] Speaker A: I've done it before. Goodbye.
[00:52:18] Speaker B: All right.
[00:52:20] Speaker C: Is that too real for you, Mike?
[00:52:22] Speaker B: All right, listen, Mike. Drive saw.
Oh, you're with me.
[00:52:33] Speaker C: Hello? It's for you, Mike.
[00:52:35] Speaker B: Hey.
[00:52:36] Speaker A: The wings, they come with sauce. Like, usually in the container, there's additional sauce. That's usually enough for me, but I don't ever feel compelled to dip it into, like, the ranch or the blue cheese. It's enough for me.
[00:52:51] Speaker B: Did you already get a.
[00:52:55] Speaker A: No, I'm using the emergency phone that's on the side of the road. You ever see those? Little.
[00:53:00] Speaker B: Weird.
I was going to say, I thought that you left your cell phone in the car. I did. Okay.
[00:53:06] Speaker C: Yeah, it's right here.
[00:53:07] Speaker A: Please don't touch it.
[00:53:09] Speaker C: I'm going to take pictures.
[00:53:10] Speaker A: Oh, man. I heard that. All right, goodbye.
[00:53:14] Speaker B: Fuck you okay. No, I like doubling up on the sauces. That's all I was going to say. I like the doubling up.
[00:53:22] Speaker A: All right, you know what, Mike? I've been thinking.
I'm sorry. I've made that Tom Jones reference. I know you hate.
[00:53:34] Speaker B: Can't. I can't do hate. I hate Tom Jones.
[00:53:38] Speaker A: Will you come back and pick me up? Just reverse.
[00:53:41] Speaker B: All right, the truck comes to us.
You hear the beep? Beep beep. All right, get back.
[00:53:52] Speaker A: Okay, thank you.
[00:53:55] Speaker C: While we're on our way, maybe we should talk a little bit more about the episode, because when we get to the convention, that's all I'm going to want to focus on.
[00:54:03] Speaker A: That's right.
[00:54:04] Speaker B: Yeah. We're hitting some traffic here, so it might take us a full two minutes to get there.
[00:54:07] Speaker A: I mean, on the topic of the wings, after Ray and Robert get ejected from the hall of Fame because Ray is insisting that he is important enough to cut the line, essentially.
And of course, I just want to mention tug McGraw does not like Ray because he wrote an article disapproving of players becoming announcers. When I hear that, I got thoughts on that in a second. But also on the wings, I liked Robert's charm with the.
And, you know, sort of gloating to Ray. It's nice to be important, but it's important to be nice. Now, what are your thoughts on players becoming announcers?
[00:54:54] Speaker B: I don't have a problem with it. I think they give good commentary. I just wanted to say that Tuck McGraw's quotes to Ray made me realize that Ray is a freaking savage newspaper writer, and it gave me a lot more respect for him. I think I would have genuinely loved it.
I love reading articles that just unashamedly and unabashedly just tear things or people to pieces just by ripping. My favorite article of all time is from a food critic reviewing chicken nuggets who. Which he describes as aggressively imperfect and, oh, my God, what a great line. I don't know. I just loved the blight on the hearing public. That's such a fun.
[00:55:37] Speaker C: As your friend, I must inform you that that is the least surprising thing you have ever said. Just that opinion on reviews you'd like.
[00:55:47] Speaker B: Oh, I love it.
[00:55:47] Speaker C: Torn into I love most you thing I've ever heard.
[00:55:52] Speaker B: So much fun.
[00:55:53] Speaker C: And I have never been less surprised in anything in my entire life.
[00:55:58] Speaker A: You must be just thrilled with the reception that we get.
[00:56:04] Speaker B: Oh, it's great. Well, the thing is the reception, okay. If I can make a critique of the people that critique the show, you don't have enough fun with it. Ray had fun tearing into Tug McGraw and the radio announcers and public and stuff like that. He made fun of him. He had a couple good one liners in there. There's nobody making puns about how bad we are. They just all cast tell us we suck. There's no imagination in that.
[00:56:31] Speaker A: We should, I think if people really wanted to stick it to us, they should give us, like, give us five stars, obviously, because we're encouraging this behavior. But in the actual body of the review, go nuts. Go get creative with it. Tell us, and you know what? Just tear into us.
[00:56:51] Speaker B: I think that would so badly confuse the rest of the people that are thinking about listening to this show.
Just the most gut wrenching.
This made my baby vomit. I hate this. I had to tear up my eardrums. Five stars. Such a great, such a great way of going about it. I love that.
[00:57:11] Speaker A: Please don't mention that situation with the baby. We're not supposed to talk about it while the lawsuit is pending.
I'm going to have to edit that out.
[00:57:22] Speaker B: I'm sorry.
I forgot about that lawsuit that we're dealing with. I apologize.
[00:57:27] Speaker A: She said she's willing to settle, but we just have to let it. We got to let the lawyers work it out.
[00:57:33] Speaker C: Of course she's willing to settle. Do you see her husband?
[00:57:37] Speaker B: See, that's what I mean. That's the clever jokes that I'm looking for. And we don't get those in our comments.
[00:57:43] Speaker A: No, you're right. We should really challenge people to be mean to us.
[00:57:48] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:57:49] Speaker A: The meanest person will win something. There you go. Incentive.
[00:57:55] Speaker C: So anyway, yeah, I did really enjoy in this episode how it was basically the ray gets shit on parade, and then Robert kind of gets a taste of the comeuppance in an interesting way because one of the very few places where Robert has power and Ray does not is in his occupation. And yeah, it sucks that cops get this special treatment with other cops, but it happens and it's true.
So when Ray gets pulled over, Robert kind of smugly goes in. He's like, he's fine, officer. Trust me, I got him. And he doesn't get it. It's just a fun mirroring of the episode's events. I actually think it was really smart the way it was done.
[00:58:39] Speaker A: They played that really well, I thought. And it's just a great structure for particularly a sitcom episode to see these power shifts know Ray is high status. At the start. Robert needs know he's relying on Ray to get access to this thing that he wants. Then Ray gets kicked out. So then Robert becomes the high status character, and then at the end, they end up more or less equal, basically back where they started war. And then they start singing war by Edwin Starr.
[00:59:12] Speaker B: What a great song.
[00:59:13] Speaker C: I liked that.
[00:59:14] Speaker B: What a great moment.
[00:59:14] Speaker A: I like the whole.
[00:59:15] Speaker B: By the way, we're here.
[00:59:16] Speaker A: Oh, shit. That was a mike. You don't need to use the emergency brake unless it's an emergency.
[00:59:24] Speaker B: No, it's the parking brake. It's for when we're going to park.
[00:59:28] Speaker A: Well, I'll send you the bill from my whiplash doctor, JK Simmons.
[00:59:37] Speaker B: No problem. I'm also paying for everybody's dry cleaning, so don't worry. We're good.
[00:59:42] Speaker A: By the way, Alex, speaking of dry cleaning, would you like to get dressed?
[00:59:50] Speaker C: Oh, yeah.
[00:59:51] Speaker A: Shit. I got to get the paint will come out of the seats.
Don't worry.
[00:59:58] Speaker B: Okay. I would hope so. Otherwise, then I'm sending you my bill.
[01:00:03] Speaker A: Oh, okay. And I will throw it in the garbage because I don't respect you.
[01:00:09] Speaker C: Wow.
[01:00:10] Speaker A: Don't kick me out again.
[01:00:12] Speaker B: That feels.
Adam, get out. That's it. That's it. You're out of the truck. Get out of the truck. Get out of.
Hold on a second, Alex. We're going to back up. We're going to back up to the other compressionist hall of fame.
Adam, get out.
[01:00:30] Speaker A: Oh, man.
[01:00:31] Speaker B: Come on. Get out.
[01:00:32] Speaker A: Fine. I deserved it.
[01:00:33] Speaker B: Get out. All right, Alex, we're back.
[01:00:36] Speaker C: Okay.
I look good.
[01:00:38] Speaker A: Hello. You look all right. Is that Mr. Shearer? Yes. Come on. We've been waiting for you. Come in, please. We need all of the induction.
[01:00:46] Speaker B: Okay. Come on.
[01:00:47] Speaker C: Oh, excellent. Let's go, Mike.
[01:00:49] Speaker A: Or should I say Mrs. Simpson?
[01:00:53] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, that's me.
[01:00:55] Speaker A: So come on in. Come on in. You're running a little behind, but it looks like you're already in costume, so that's great. We're going to have you. Yes. You're going to wait behind the curtain here with the other inductees.
[01:01:06] Speaker B: Simon Cowell.
[01:01:08] Speaker A: That's right.
[01:01:10] Speaker B: Hey, I got him. There we go.
[01:01:12] Speaker A: Gave it away. Tight black t shirt or british?
[01:01:15] Speaker B: The english accent, mostly.
[01:01:17] Speaker A: Okay.
[01:01:17] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:01:17] Speaker C: Where are my manners? This is my.
With. He is accompanying me.
[01:01:22] Speaker A: Oh. Who do you do an impression of?
[01:01:25] Speaker B: Nobody.
[01:01:25] Speaker C: Well, it's okay, Simon. He's with me.
[01:01:28] Speaker A: Yes. We'll just have you sit in the friends and family section of the audience, which is the first three rows. Pretty good, but it's pretty crowded down there, so just go find your seat, sir, and the talent and I will make arrangements back here, please.
[01:01:47] Speaker B: The talent? I think that's a bit of a stretch.
[01:01:49] Speaker A: Please.
[01:01:50] Speaker C: It is.
I don't even know why I'm here, honestly.
[01:01:54] Speaker A: Please help yourself to a schwepz on the way out.
[01:01:58] Speaker B: Oh, sweet.
[01:01:59] Speaker C: I loved cashews.
What?
These don't taste like cashews.
[01:02:09] Speaker A: It's ginger ale.
[01:02:13] Speaker C: Oh, I probably shouldn't eat the plastic part.
[01:02:16] Speaker A: Yeah.
All right. This is part of your character, your act.
[01:02:22] Speaker C: Sure, buddy. Let's go with that.
[01:02:24] Speaker A: All right.
[01:02:25] Speaker B: Just Mike. Sorry.
[01:02:28] Speaker A: Please, sir, we really need you to leave so that the entertainers.
[01:02:32] Speaker B: Oh, sorry.
[01:02:34] Speaker C: That was whole unfiltered stupidity on my part. Let's go to the back.
[01:02:40] Speaker A: So here's the other talent, the other inductees, obviously, plenty of Elvis is here. We've got Elton John, we've got Bono, and we've got Clay Aiken.
Kelly Aiken.
[01:02:54] Speaker B: Hello. Hello.
[01:02:58] Speaker A: That's his main thing. The act sort of Peters off after that.
[01:03:03] Speaker B: That's all I got.
[01:03:04] Speaker A: It's mainly the vertigo.
[01:03:07] Speaker C: Yeah, that's another one I know from Bono.
[01:03:12] Speaker A: What he does at the end of his performances is really great. He turns around, he's like, well, I still haven't found what I'm looking for. And then he leaves. It's pretty good. I mean, that's why you're here. Hall of Famer.
We've got.
I think we're going to put you with the other cartoon characters, obviously, for obvious reasons. Shrek, SpongeBob, Donkey and Bugs Bunny. Bugs Bunny as a woman.
[01:03:43] Speaker B: What's up, doc?
[01:03:45] Speaker C: You're a very nice sounding woman.
[01:03:48] Speaker A: These are the best of the best hall of famers.
[01:03:52] Speaker C: I'm feeling a lot better about my impression now.
[01:03:55] Speaker A: Of course, we've got the comedian section as well. We've got Jerry Seinfeld, Rodney Dangerfield.
[01:04:03] Speaker C: What's the deal?
[01:04:05] Speaker A: Obviously, we've got Ray Romano, who's the big. I mean, everyone's a star here, hall of Fame. But this is Leroy, and he does the world's best Ray Romano impression. I'll just leave you two to talk. I've got judging to do, so I'll go down to the table, and we'll see you all out there.
[01:04:27] Speaker B: I'm going to leave for sports right now.
[01:04:31] Speaker C: Wow.
If that's your regular voice, I can't wait to hear the impression.
[01:04:35] Speaker B: Oh, no, that's my impression. That's all I got. I got the right.
[01:04:40] Speaker C: Wow. I got five voices at once right there.
[01:04:45] Speaker B: I can't mix.
[01:04:46] Speaker C: Just kind of settling back into your regular voice there.
[01:04:48] Speaker B: It takes a while. You know how it goes.
[01:04:50] Speaker C: No, but okay.
So is this your first time doing this? I'm a little nervous, I got to admit.
[01:04:57] Speaker B: Oh, no. I'm a ted time inductee. They got me good.
[01:05:02] Speaker C: Any advice for a newcomer?
[01:05:05] Speaker B: Yeah.
Whatever you do, don't forget to do the impression.
[01:05:13] Speaker C: That's a good idea.
[01:05:14] Speaker B: That upset people a lot. Yeah.
[01:05:17] Speaker C: I'm sure the audience would not be happy having their balls tickled for, like, 3 hours and then not get.
[01:05:25] Speaker B: Oh, so you did read the headlines. That is why we had to fire Larry. We thought that would be that. He thought, like, oh, it'd get people happy. It turns out that is the textbook definition of sexual assault. So we had to fire him.
[01:05:39] Speaker C: I like you, Leroy.
[01:05:42] Speaker B: That's a new one. Yeah, that's a new one on me. Most people don't like me.
[01:05:47] Speaker C: No, you tell it how it is. I like it.
[01:05:49] Speaker B: I do. That's the problem.
[01:05:52] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:05:53] Speaker B: You're tall.
[01:05:54] Speaker C: Thanks. It's the hair, mostly.
[01:05:56] Speaker B: Yeah, I can tell that, too.
[01:05:58] Speaker A: Eight and a half.
[01:05:58] Speaker B: You don't look that good in a dress.
[01:06:00] Speaker C: Hey, I'm trying.
[01:06:01] Speaker B: I can tell.
[01:06:03] Speaker A: Hey, everybody calm down over here.
Things seem to be getting a little too spicy, so why don't we all calm down?
[01:06:11] Speaker C: Clinton impersonator.
[01:06:13] Speaker A: Well, I guess I gave myself away a little bit, but I guess that's the whole point. I think we should all just try to take it easy. Calm down a little bit.
[01:06:22] Speaker C: That's a nice saxophone you got there. Is that like a toy?
[01:06:25] Speaker A: No, this is real. I play saxophone in real.
Know. I almost feel like I say this in every interview that I've been working towards being Bill Clinton my whole life.
[01:06:38] Speaker B: Kind of concerning, actually. Bill Clinton has committed a lot of crimes.
[01:06:42] Speaker A: I'll say. Demand has gone down over the past couple of years.
Before I did Bill, though, I did George W. Bush, and then. So that sort know, dropped off as well.
[01:06:55] Speaker B: I'm just sort of dipster. Dipster.
[01:06:57] Speaker A: I'm trying to find my new thing, but if you go with more recent.
[01:07:03] Speaker C: Presidents, I'm sure you'll be loved anyway.
[01:07:08] Speaker A: Actually, I'm thinking about doing.
I don't know if you're familiar with the 1990s sitcom everybody loves Raymond.
[01:07:17] Speaker B: Sure.
[01:07:18] Speaker A: It's a character on that show called Ray Barone, and I thought I might transition to that.
[01:07:26] Speaker C: Okay, so you're going to transition from doing U. S. Presidents to beloved comedy actor and not the man, but the character he plays. Ray Barone.
[01:07:39] Speaker A: Ray Barone.
Not Ray Romano.
[01:07:42] Speaker C: Ray Romano. No, there's a difference.
[01:07:45] Speaker A: No, and I meant that when I said it.
[01:07:47] Speaker C: Can I hear your Ray Barone versus your kind of.
[01:07:53] Speaker A: I'm still working on it, but. All right. This is a safe space, artist to artist.
[01:07:59] Speaker C: I don't know about that. Yeah, don't hold your breath.
[01:08:02] Speaker B: I'm not safe.
Hillary, was that for.
[01:08:13] Speaker C: That's pretty good. I think you're getting your streams crossed a little bit there, buddy.
[01:08:17] Speaker A: It did not have sexual relations with that woman.
[01:08:22] Speaker B: All right, well, you need new catchphrases, but you got something going here.
[01:08:26] Speaker A: Good old sacks.
[01:08:29] Speaker B: There you go.
[01:08:33] Speaker C: That should be the title of the episode.
[01:08:36] Speaker A: Places, please. Everybody to their places. The ceremony is about to begin. Yeah. Leroy, you're taking this very well. I really appreciate you rolling with me, stealing your whole thing.
[01:08:48] Speaker B: Yeah. You know what? Ten in a row is too much. I don't even think it was that much. I get to shut up. We should get to us.
[01:08:55] Speaker C: Is this like a prize thing or like.
[01:08:57] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[01:08:58] Speaker C: I thought it was just.
[01:08:59] Speaker A: You get inducted, but you also get to be the winner if you're the winner.
[01:09:04] Speaker C: Well, no one told me that.
[01:09:07] Speaker A: All right, ladies and gentlemen, please. Paula, go ahead. Sorry. Jump the gun a little bit. You'd think I'd be better at this by now, but go ahead, Paula.
[01:09:15] Speaker B: Hello.
[01:09:16] Speaker A: So great to see you.
[01:09:18] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, it's great.
[01:09:19] Speaker A: We're so sorry that Randy couldn't be here, everyone. He is doing a USO tour with.
[01:09:26] Speaker B: Journey, but he did tell us to pass along the message that he loves you, dog.
Great to hear.
[01:09:37] Speaker C: Hey, I know, dog.
[01:09:41] Speaker B: Yeah.
Okay. How are you, everybody? Yeah, I just want to say thank you for coming to tonight's induction of the hall of Fame impressionist. Yay. And tonight is brought to you by Schwepz Cashews. And we want to thank them for.
[01:10:02] Speaker A: Their new slogan.
[01:10:06] Speaker B: We'Re branching out. It's a great advertising camp. Everybody have their own cashews that are on the back on the way out. And, well, without further ado, we don't want to make this night longer than it has to be. We announce the winner. The winner of the impressionist of the year is. Can I get a drum roll, please?
Thank you for that great impression of a drum roll. Make sure we include you next time.
The winner is. Alex, cheer for Marge Simpson.
[01:10:40] Speaker C: Oh, my God. I can't believe I. I definitely didn't cheat this time.
Thanks, everyone.
[01:10:48] Speaker B: Yeah. Here you go. All right, well, you know what we got to hear now?
[01:10:53] Speaker C: What?
[01:10:54] Speaker A: We got to hear your impression, mom.
[01:10:58] Speaker C: All right, it takes a second. I got to come out.
[01:11:02] Speaker A: We're waiting.
[01:11:03] Speaker B: It's okay. We understand. It takes some time.
[01:11:06] Speaker C: All right, well, here is more.
[01:11:08] Speaker A: This is the one thing that I'm not going into cynically and thinking it's going to be bad. I'm really ready to open up to you.
[01:11:16] Speaker B: I voted for this without hearing it because of how good it is. If it's bad, I am going to lose my job, and the Hollywood elite will actually murder me.
[01:11:26] Speaker A: I'll be fine.
[01:11:29] Speaker B: Anyway. $10 million running on you shout out.
[01:11:33] Speaker C: Anyway, here's Marge Simpson reading from a monologue from the play hamlet.
[01:11:45] Speaker A: We cut.
Is that Mike's Camry? Hey, over here.
[01:11:54] Speaker C: Hi.
I'm definitely not some guy stealing this Camry.
[01:11:59] Speaker A: Me, neither. And I'm not his husband. Also stealing it. I know the guy who owns this car. I bet. Look, I'll make a deal with you. If you take me to where he is, I won't tell him you stole it.
[01:12:11] Speaker C: All right, but only if you listen to our entire backstory along the way.
[01:12:16] Speaker A: I'm sure that won't be ridiculously involved and convoluted in a way that maybe wouldn't make sense if you listened closely to it.
[01:12:25] Speaker C: Don't worry, it makes sense. It's called a glorious wall.
[01:12:31] Speaker A: It all started in 1989.
[01:12:38] Speaker C: The end.
[01:12:39] Speaker B: Tomatoes are already surrounding him, orange.
[01:12:44] Speaker A: Now this.
[01:12:45] Speaker B: Paula is in the corner weeping.
[01:12:48] Speaker A: Can we. We got to get. We got to get Paula out of here. Okay. Yeah, send the chopper.
Okay, folks, folks, calm down. Look, hey, I mean, if we got through David Archuletta, we can get through this, right? Haha. Little idol jokes for that.
[01:13:05] Speaker B: Fuck this guy.
[01:13:06] Speaker A: Oh, come on, Dunkelman. Calm down, everybody. Just let's bring the temperature down a little bit. No need for tensions to flare. And just at that moment. So from the back of the auditorium, Adam and the couple burst in and they're pissed at Mike for escaping.
And from the roof, a CIA SWAT team drops down.
[01:13:32] Speaker B: I just were just saying what a great line. They're pissed at Mike for escaping.
The CIA operatives burst at the top of the gate. However, I tear everybody. You heard some man on three. We burst in and we just start taking shots. We're not letting Bill Clinton escape this time. Everybody.
[01:13:57] Speaker A: We're certain this is him, right?
[01:14:01] Speaker B: I heard him. I heard him. I call. I wouldn't let that make mistake.
[01:14:05] Speaker A: All right. And when all this is over, we let Monica decide who she goes out with. Okay?
[01:14:17] Speaker B: May the best man.
[01:14:18] Speaker A: We may.
[01:14:18] Speaker C: The typical gladiatorial thing where she does the thumbs up, thumbs down at the end.
[01:14:23] Speaker B: Yes, correct.
[01:14:24] Speaker A: Hey, if we're lucky, thumb.
[01:14:27] Speaker B: All right, let's make it rain. They burst through firing.
[01:14:35] Speaker A: Oh, shit.
Our thing doesn't seem so important. Guys, let's get down. What the fuck is this?
[01:14:42] Speaker C: Oh my God.
[01:14:43] Speaker A: Alex, get over here. Hey, we're under the seats. Come here, come here, come under the seats.
[01:14:48] Speaker C: I'm crawling.
[01:14:49] Speaker A: This is Daryl and I don't know if we ever got your name, but that's fine.
[01:14:56] Speaker C: Howdy. Henry. Nice to meet you.
[01:14:59] Speaker A: How are you doing?
You're friends with Mike, right?
[01:15:04] Speaker C: Friends is a strong word. It's also an accurate word.
[01:15:08] Speaker A: Well, we wanted to apologize to him.
[01:15:13] Speaker C: Oh, are you the people that kidnapped.
[01:15:15] Speaker A: Yeah, we wanted to apologize.
[01:15:16] Speaker C: Why'd you let him go?
[01:15:17] Speaker A: That's what we want to apologize for. Letting him go and not getting to.
Allowing him to spend the rest of our lives with us.
[01:15:25] Speaker C: Well, there's still time.
He's around here somewhere.
[01:15:29] Speaker A: All right. Yeah. The Pentagon said they wouldn't take this, so just, I don't know, you can have it back.
[01:15:37] Speaker B: Seems fine. Do me a favor and don't mention that ever, no matter what happens.
[01:15:41] Speaker A: Okay? Hey, in a little while, in a couple of minutes, you're going to get an email asking you to fill out a short survey. And that would we cut.
[01:15:51] Speaker B: We see the CIA grab Bill Clinton that he's starting to be.
[01:15:56] Speaker A: There he goes, held out of the room. Oh, there he goes.
The sidewall of the auditorium blows up and a bunch of South Americans come.
[01:16:07] Speaker B: Charging through for no reason.
[01:16:11] Speaker A: El Chapo.
[01:16:13] Speaker B: Exactly. Then you see dog lower his glasses and go, Argentina. Karamba. It's just nuts.
[01:16:22] Speaker C: Well, it's time to go.
[01:16:24] Speaker A: Yeah, let's get out of here.
[01:16:26] Speaker C: Get in the camera, dog.
[01:16:28] Speaker B: And starts charging the South America as.
[01:16:30] Speaker A: Mike walks into the middle of this.
[01:16:33] Speaker B: Guys, I got a pack. Oh, my God.
[01:16:36] Speaker A: That's our cocaine sides.
[01:16:38] Speaker C: Fire.
[01:16:39] Speaker B: There you go.
[01:16:41] Speaker C: Shoot the coke.
[01:16:44] Speaker A: Ooh, that's good.
[01:16:45] Speaker C: Wait, why are we shooting? That's good shit.
[01:16:48] Speaker A: Hey, I think. Why are we fighting? We should be friends.
[01:16:53] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:16:54] Speaker A: Do you want to get married?
[01:16:57] Speaker C: Hi. Oh, okay. Well, then, that's young.
[01:17:01] Speaker A: I like this.
Daryl, this is getting to be. I think we could stick around here for a.
[01:17:07] Speaker B: Like.
[01:17:07] Speaker C: Let's stay here. Henry, get in the middle of this peanut butter and cocaine sandwich.
[01:17:13] Speaker A: I love you.
[01:17:14] Speaker C: I love you.
[01:17:16] Speaker A: Wow. Just step on it. Just go. Just go. Just go. Just go.
All right. Is there anything else? We want to talk about this episode, because I need to either go to the hospital or go to sleep.
[01:17:30] Speaker C: Well, I'm happy that I won.
[01:17:31] Speaker A: Oh, you won.
[01:17:32] Speaker B: Good job.
[01:17:33] Speaker C: Yeah, I got the trophy right here.
[01:17:35] Speaker A: Oh, it's beautiful. I mean, it looks like a trophy, but kind of like off. Like it's pretending to be one.
[01:17:43] Speaker C: Let's not look at it. But I think I'm ready to dissect about how Ray did in this episode. As we drive, take the three minute drive back to know, avoiding the tolls.
[01:17:56] Speaker B: We'll take three guys.
[01:17:58] Speaker A: All right, here we go.
[01:17:59] Speaker C: You guys know how this works at this point. If you didn't, this must be your first episode. Or you just don't listen to the end. But the idea is that we spend every single week rating Ray's performance as a husband, father, brother, son on a scale of one to ten, one being the horrible tv dads of sitcom history, your Walter whites and others whose names I forget, and your tens being your Carl Winslow's and Danny Tanners. Adam, give me one of each, you asshole.
[01:18:31] Speaker A: So you took that from me so that you wouldn't have to come up with a example.
[01:18:40] Speaker C: You're damn right, son.
[01:18:42] Speaker A: One of each, you say? Well, for a.
[01:18:45] Speaker C: How do you like it?
[01:18:46] Speaker A: I'm fine with it. My knowledge is deep.
[01:18:49] Speaker B: If there's anyone that's not going to have a problem naming characters from television or movies, it's going to be Adam.
[01:18:56] Speaker A: Yeah, for a bad dad, I think I'll go with the first thing that came to mind was Archie bunker. But objectively, he's bad, but that's sort of debatable. Racist.
And then for a good know, I'm actually going to go with Chris's dad on everybody hates Chris, played by terry crews.
[01:19:20] Speaker C: He does not like Chris.
[01:19:22] Speaker A: No, he loves Chris, I don't think.
[01:19:24] Speaker B: I've watched everybody hates Chris, so I don't really know much about it.
[01:19:27] Speaker A: Would it shock you to know that I've seen every episode of Everybody hates Chris?
[01:19:31] Speaker B: No, not at all. It's very not surprising.
[01:19:34] Speaker A: So there you go.
[01:19:36] Speaker C: All right, well, then, let's go around the room and talk about how Ray's performing here. Mike, you want to go first, buddy?
[01:19:44] Speaker B: Yeah, sure, I'll go first. So, I mean, on the one hand, listen, okay, Ray was not good this episode, but I will give him credit where credit is due. It is not his fault that this shit went down the way it did at all. Okay, listen, if you want to go see the mets in cooperstown, you tell your brother more than a day before you have to leave. Marie led with, there's a ceremony tomorrow. What the hell are we. It's not Ray's fault. It's not Ray's fault. He could have very easily said, no, I can't. You gotta let me know in advance, and that would be fine. It's unreasonable for Robert or Marie to expect Ray to drop everything at a drop of a hat to get up there. And if that is the case, I don't think you can blame him if it goes kind of sideways. That being said, his reasoning for it was not I had plans. It was because Robert's feet stink. Be that as it may, that might be a legitimate excuse. Don't think it was a great brotherly moment, especially when he got kicked off the know. He also was kind of a dick to Robert in the car back home.
But I'm not going to deduct him a ton of points for everything, because, like I said, it's kind of a reasonable, unforeseen circumstance that you kind of get guilted into taking a brother someplace.
I'm going to go with 4.34.3.
[01:21:05] Speaker A: Very. How specific.
[01:21:07] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:21:09] Speaker C: All right, Adam.
[01:21:10] Speaker B: Adam, what do you think?
[01:21:12] Speaker A: Here's where I differ from you. I do think that the way this went down was Ray's fault because ray got the wrong day.
[01:21:22] Speaker B: He was told the day before that he has to go, and the day that he was told was the press day.
[01:21:29] Speaker A: Well, be that as it may, he could have double checked or something.
Maybe he had other reporter friends who were calling him, being like, wow, Ray, I sure am excited to go on the 14th or whatever it is. I don't know.
I think this situation could have been avoided and Ray could have been the hero if, a, he had gone on the correct day, and b, he had not been horrible about taking Robert.
This is the thing with Ray that sort of signals to me every time, oh, this is going to be a bad ray episode where he is asked to do something nice for someone else and his reaction is essentially, I don't want.
That's. That's the mode of Rey that we got this. You know, everything just sort of follows from that. He's rude to the waitress, whereas Robert is very, you know, doesn't hit it off with tug. And, yeah, I think everyone he interacts with is pretty negative. Oh, and the gay panic. I'm going to have to knock him for that. I'm going to give him a good three in this.
Three for trying to use Robert to circumvent the law that he broke. And if there's anything I like, it's the so and Mike. Just keep going. Those pedestrians will be fine.
Alex, where is Ray? Coming in for you.
[01:23:05] Speaker C: So you see, Adam, I think I got a side more with Mike on this one. I do not blame Ray at all for how this initiated. And I think he was alerted way too close to the actual event for him to get there. Like for the journal, the journalist day.
Clearly this was not something he was planning on going to. If it was, we would have a completely different story, obviously.
And so Robert kind of asking him to take him is. Again, that's not Ray's fault. He reacted to it kind of like an course, you know, Ray thought he could get in. It was just. He literally didn't want to. And then when he actually got there and started getting issues, that's where I think I'm going to stop fighting for Ray here.
If at that moment, he kind of just took the ill and was like, okay, let's just wait on the line, whatever. We're here.
I get why Ray wouldn't want to. Right? He meets people like this all the time, but this is such a big thing for Robert. Yeah. Rude to the waitress, overall kind of an asshole to his brother, breaks the law. Gay panic.
Just overall, pretty shit. I'm just not blaming him for how this initiated. I think I'm going to go with a solid four.
[01:24:35] Speaker A: Ok, Mike, what's the average of three? If you can just get your. I know you have one of those calculators that has the tape that comes out. If you can get that out, don't.
[01:24:45] Speaker B: Mind the zigging and zagging this whole.
[01:24:47] Speaker A: That's fine. The lines are a suggestion on the road.
[01:24:51] Speaker B: Okay, that's going to be a. Got it. That's a 3.8. Actually. We're going to round off.
[01:24:59] Speaker A: Right. To me, this is why we take the average is we have differences of opinions and then we come into a point of agreement. One thing that we didn't talk about, sorry, real quick, is it's not exactly the hot close of the episode. It's sort of this weird, like, interstitial between the two cars.
[01:25:19] Speaker B: He had two hot closes.
[01:25:20] Speaker A: Yeah, it was weird.
[01:25:21] Speaker B: Two hot clothes.
[01:25:21] Speaker A: So we cut back to the cafe where everyone from before, it's the same extras is waiting for a table at this one cafe in Cooperstown.
And including the 69 mets, Art Shamsky tries to do the big timing that Ray did and tries to cut. And then the same guy that yelled at Ray yells at Art Shamsky, no cuts. And then we go back to the car for meet the Mets and then war.
I thought that was.
[01:25:54] Speaker B: They should have gotten Cleon Jones to do the haggling. I'm just saying that he's a bigger star than Archamsky ever was.
[01:26:00] Speaker A: But Archamsky is part of the show because his dog isn't.
[01:26:04] Speaker B: Yeah, fair enough.
[01:26:05] Speaker A: Oh, that's something else I want to add.
[01:26:06] Speaker B: I just want to emphasize again, we did research.
Archamsky did not homer in his first at bat as a Met. Want that on the record? Even though Robbie says that every single time, it is not true.
[01:26:20] Speaker A: Okay, we'll take it up with Phil.
[01:26:22] Speaker B: I will.
[01:26:24] Speaker A: You don't have to drive there now. Stop trying to drive. No, don't take the exit for La Mike.
[01:26:29] Speaker B: I'm taking the exit. We're going to give Phil a piece of my.
[01:26:32] Speaker A: That's a great first meeting between us and Phil is you yelling at him about Art Shamsky.
[01:26:39] Speaker B: He was wrong.
[01:26:40] Speaker A: All right, fine.
I'm going to sit in the back. But I did want to say about the art Shamsky thing. How would you react? Let's say somebody really likes this show and we are doing a meet and greet event at, I don't know, a dumpster or something. Like, where could. I don't know. Realistically, where could we host an event?
A dumpster, the bottom of a pond?
Know, a hospital basement.
Somebody comes up to you and says, mike. I named my dog Mike after you.
What's your reaction?
[01:27:20] Speaker C: Name my dog Jamaica after you.
[01:27:23] Speaker B: Hey, that's sweet, but if he hands me a dog collar design, I'm thinking it's a kink thing.
[01:27:28] Speaker A: Okay, so am I, but how do you react to that?
[01:27:33] Speaker B: I think I sign it to avoid the awkward confrontation, but I'm perturbed by the interaction.
[01:27:40] Speaker A: I feel as though I would sign anything just to. Just because somebody likes me enough to want my signature.
[01:27:50] Speaker C: Plus, if they use it afterwards, then the signature is going to get ruined, so who cares?
[01:27:55] Speaker B: Well, you sign on the outside.
[01:27:56] Speaker A: Yeah, but you got to depends on what they're doing in the collar, if they're doing weathered.
[01:28:02] Speaker C: These two get a lot of sweater.
[01:28:03] Speaker A: German guys who picked me up were telling me about some of the stuff they were into, and that would definitely wear off a signature quick.
[01:28:11] Speaker B: Okay, fair enough. Fair enough.
[01:28:13] Speaker A: Okay. Anything else?
[01:28:17] Speaker B: No. I thought the warrior what is a good poor scene was a very good brotherly moment.
[01:28:20] Speaker A: I like the randomness of it, of just transitioning from Meet the Mets. Do you know anything about that song, by the way? Like when it was written, how it came about, why they refer to it as.
[01:28:36] Speaker B: I mean, I think that one was just needed just for the rhyme. I don't know anything about the founding of it. I just know the lyrics. That's about it.
[01:28:43] Speaker A: Would you like to know about it?
[01:28:45] Speaker B: Oh, my God, would I?
[01:28:46] Speaker A: Meet the Mets is the fight song of the New York Mets. The music and lyrics were written in 1961 by Ruth Roberts and Bill Katz, and it was originally recorded by Glenn Osser's orchestra. The song's lyrics, east side, west side, are a tribute to the sidewalks of New York, a popular New York song of the 1890s. Rewritten and modernized versions were recorded in 1975 and 1984.
It beat 18 other entries for the official song of the Mets.
Does not say what those were.
And the team, I would love to hear them. The team sold 45 rpm records of the songs of the song for $1 at the Polo Grounds, their home stadium, in 1963 and via mail order.
Yeah, it was featured in this is sports center commercial starring Mr. Met, as well as on Seinfeld and everybody loves Raymond.
Rock band Yola Tango recorded a version of Meet the Mets live on New Jersey radio station WFMU that was included on the 2006 compilation album. Yola Tango is murdering the classics. I like Yola Tango.
[01:29:57] Speaker B: I've never heard Yola Tango, but I like them now.
[01:30:00] Speaker A: They're a good indie rock band.
They do a cover of Friday I'm in Love by the Cure. That's quite pleasant.
[01:30:09] Speaker B: Nice.
Quite pleasant.
[01:30:12] Speaker A: In 2008, an updated version of the song was recorded with a rap hip hop sound purportedly to appeal to a younger generation that didn't catch on I guess not.
Are you familiar with let's go Mets, go. The rally song of the 1986 Mets, which you claim to know a lot about.
[01:30:32] Speaker B: I do know a lot about the 1986 Mets. I don't know that one.
[01:30:36] Speaker A: Okay, I will save that for when the 1986 Mets appear on Everybody loves Raymond and we talk about it on everybody loves everybody loves Raymond.
[01:30:49] Speaker B: Episode four. Ray does cocaine with Keith Hernandez is a part of it. I can't wait. It's going to be great.
[01:30:56] Speaker A: Okay, anything else we want to talk about before you drive us dangerously close to the edge of the Verizono bridge, which I can't believe we're already back here. And I can't believe you took us this way again.
[01:31:08] Speaker B: It's just physics. If you stay closer on, if you ride the edge, you're going to go faster.
[01:31:13] Speaker A: We've burnt through all 35 of my dollars. We're going to have to go through the. To get into Limbrook, the toll lane. We're going to have to shake down your nephew or something.
[01:31:23] Speaker B: Again, just take the exit ramp, the.
[01:31:26] Speaker C: One that allows you to jump over the.
[01:31:27] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Or we could get air.
[01:31:30] Speaker B: All right, guys, so that's what we'll do. And I guess we'll close out on that right as we're about to hit the jump over the full booth.
[01:31:37] Speaker C: Okay, quick. It's coming up. Thanks for much for listening. Don't forget that everybody loves Raymond and we love you.
[01:31:49] Speaker B: Air death.
