[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hey, you're about to listen to everybody loves everybody loves Raymond. A postfun podcast. Well, we here at Postfun have a new comedy podcast for you to listen to that might even be better than this one. It's called with Grease, Wind, and Fire. It is an improv podcast from a group of funny friends of ours, and it's currently available on all podcast apps. So check it out wherever you listen. And go to slash GWF to learn more. That's postfund.org, gwf, and wherever you listen to podcasts. Now on with the show.
Dance club. Dance club. Free admission. No cover. Two drink minimum, but no cover. Dance club, sir? Dance club, ma'am?
[00:01:04] Speaker B: No, sorry. I got to walk my toaster.
[00:01:06] Speaker A: Wait. Oh, is it on? It's on wheels.
You're really walking your toast. Wait, slow down. Come back.
[00:01:13] Speaker B: Dude, get away from me. In my toaster.
[00:01:18] Speaker A: I like it. It's cool.
[00:01:20] Speaker B: I know jujitsu.
[00:01:22] Speaker A: I believe you. You're dressed in the outfit so obviously. And congratulations. I see you're holding that trophy. Did you win big, or is that consolation?
[00:01:31] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. No, I did great. I finished third overall.
[00:01:37] Speaker A: Third overall out of four.
[00:01:41] Speaker B: Hey, I got one. I got a guy. It was pretty great.
[00:01:45] Speaker A: Was it a clean win, or did you sucker punch him?
You swept the leg.
[00:01:53] Speaker B: You ever see the three Stooges?
[00:01:55] Speaker A: I've seen the three Stooges.
[00:01:57] Speaker B: Yeah, so it was great. We started out with great form, and then I hit him with the Yankee, and then he went to take a jab in my eye, and I hit him.
I put my hand straight the block get to me. And then I poked him in the tummy, and he fell over and I won.
[00:02:13] Speaker A: So he came at you with. He initiated the Three Stooges style.
[00:02:18] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:02:18] Speaker A: You were just there to do jujitsu.
[00:02:20] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:02:21] Speaker A: You were just there to do jujitsu.
[00:02:24] Speaker B: That's what they call.
[00:02:25] Speaker A: Have I told you about my friend who sells seashells, by the way? What about him?
Have you been to the seashore?
[00:02:32] Speaker B: Of course I've been to the seashore. It's limper.
[00:02:33] Speaker A: I can tell. You're tan. Yeah, your tan lines do sort of trace your. Gee, I will say, yeah, I never like.
You've seen the karate kid who has that montage of Daniel on the beach doing his crane kick. Does that resonate with you? Deeply.
[00:02:55] Speaker B: Every single morning, I get out there before dawn and I strike the crane pose, and I stay in it until high noon.
[00:03:05] Speaker A: Until high noon.
[00:03:06] Speaker B: Until high noon.
[00:03:07] Speaker A: Okay. Interesting. How do you know it's high noon.
If you're in the crane pose, you can't look at a watch. Is it on your ankle?
[00:03:14] Speaker B: No, I get really sweaty. I judge it based on the amount of sweat that I garner.
[00:03:19] Speaker A: Do you judge all time based on sweat?
[00:03:21] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:03:21] Speaker A: And it's feeling consistently throughout the day.
[00:03:25] Speaker B: Ten to five.
[00:03:26] Speaker A: I'm looking. What did you say? Ten to 510 to five. Nailed it.
[00:03:30] Speaker B: Yeah, I knew it might be.
[00:03:32] Speaker A: Look at my Rolex. And it's real. Look at it.
Yeah. Not to brag.
So you're wheeling a toaster behind you as you walk down the street. Did you bring bread to your karate match? I'm sorry. Jujitsu match. And it toasts as it rolls. I was going to generate its own power.
[00:03:53] Speaker B: You chased me down to ask me this question. You must be a real toaster connoisseur.
[00:03:59] Speaker A: Well, I'll tell you what.
[00:04:01] Speaker B: This right here is a walk them up 2000.
[00:04:04] Speaker A: A walk them up 2000.
[00:04:05] Speaker B: A walk them up 2000.
[00:04:06] Speaker A: It's a recent little bit behind the times.
[00:04:09] Speaker B: Oh, no. This is the 2000 walk them up. So it's like they get better every generation when they start year.
[00:04:16] Speaker A: What? When did they start with one?
No, but when? How long has it taken them to create 2000 iterations?
[00:04:25] Speaker B: Oh, I see. Four years.
[00:04:27] Speaker A: Wow.
[00:04:28] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:04:29] Speaker A: These things, if my math is right, they come up with 500 new versions of this every year.
[00:04:37] Speaker B: Listen, I have expensive hobbies. I do jujitsu and I stay up on the walk them up toasters. Okay.
[00:04:43] Speaker A: Okay. Now, would you like another expensive hobby?
[00:04:47] Speaker B: Hey, listen, this is my thing, I guess. Why not?
[00:04:50] Speaker A: How do you feel about.
[00:04:51] Speaker B: Who are you?
[00:04:52] Speaker A: I'll get to that in a second. How do you feel about dancing?
[00:04:56] Speaker B: I love it.
[00:04:57] Speaker A: Well, then I know four dance moves. Four?
[00:05:02] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:05:03] Speaker A: No, I ask what they are. Okay. Robot.
[00:05:05] Speaker B: Robot. The disco point, the chat and the macarena.
[00:05:12] Speaker A: Wow. Okay. Interesting.
I would love to see you show those off because I'm from the Limbrook local government. My name is Adam.
[00:05:22] Speaker B: You're not that asshole mayor, are you?
[00:05:25] Speaker A: No. That guy's the worst, right?
[00:05:27] Speaker B: Yeah, he sucks.
[00:05:28] Speaker A: I'm relating to you.
We're opening. I shouldn't say we. We're subsidizing the opening of a new swing club here in Limbrook.
[00:05:37] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:05:38] Speaker A: It's going to be a revival of the swing. Revival. Have you seen swingers?
[00:05:43] Speaker B: No.
[00:05:45] Speaker A: Okay, forget everything you've heard about swingers.
[00:05:49] Speaker B: Done.
[00:05:49] Speaker A: Clean slate.
[00:05:50] Speaker B: Done.
[00:05:51] Speaker A: This place is going to be called swingles for sexy singles. Come and dance.
[00:05:59] Speaker B: I love it. Can I bring my toaster?
[00:06:00] Speaker A: Are you single? Yes. You can bring your toaster. In fact, I insist. Are you single?
[00:06:06] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely.
[00:06:07] Speaker A: You're single?
[00:06:08] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:06:09] Speaker A: Who stands in the crane pose on the beach for at least 6 hours until he sweats enough that he physically can't do it anymore.
[00:06:16] Speaker B: Correct.
And that same guy walks the toaster out. Listen, I'm an interesting guy. I don't know what your lady.
[00:06:22] Speaker A: Fascinating. Yeah, fascinating. All right.
[00:06:26] Speaker B: Probably with my hit piece. My ex wife.
What is that?
[00:06:32] Speaker C: Crane pose. Jujitsu. Toaster guy.
[00:06:35] Speaker A: Yeah, that's him.
[00:06:36] Speaker C: I've been looking for that guy.
Hey, I'm coming over.
[00:06:43] Speaker A: This is the mayor. Just pretend like you like him. Hey.
[00:06:46] Speaker C: Oh, my. This guy.
[00:06:49] Speaker A: Hey.
[00:06:49] Speaker C: I owe this guy $5.
[00:06:51] Speaker B: Yeah, you do.
[00:06:51] Speaker C: I'll get that to you.
[00:06:52] Speaker B: You ruined my walk him up 1980.
[00:06:56] Speaker C: Hey, I still love your toaster. I still think it's a little dirty. You should give him a bath. Okay, hold on a second.
[00:07:06] Speaker B: I take offense to that. I take offense to that.
[00:07:08] Speaker C: You go into a club. What's this? Swingles. That sounds stupid.
[00:07:12] Speaker B: What? Idiot subsidized comes clean?
Yeah.
[00:07:17] Speaker C: Swingles is like a reference to like an old video game from what, the 80s? Leisure shoot, Larry, I don't know if you've ever heard of it. It's really fucking horny.
[00:07:26] Speaker B: Who are you? You welcome to me. You insult my toaster. You insult my jujitsu. What the hell?
[00:07:33] Speaker A: Be heavily implied.
[00:07:36] Speaker C: I'm a big any UK crane pose. But I always feel like you're going to fall over and bury your head in the sand like an ostrich.
[00:07:43] Speaker A: Wow. You're coming in unusually hot pose, Alex.
[00:07:47] Speaker C: What do you mean?
[00:07:48] Speaker A: Adam, you're coming in. If I may say toasty with these burns.
[00:07:53] Speaker C: What burns? I'm just talking to my friend. Jujitsu. Crane pose. Toaster guy.
[00:07:57] Speaker A: Do you know his name?
[00:07:58] Speaker B: I have a name?
[00:07:59] Speaker C: Yeah, of course.
[00:08:00] Speaker A: Did I ask what it is?
[00:08:01] Speaker C: Crane pose. Toaster guy.
[00:08:03] Speaker B: No, you didn't either. I liked you up until you pointed that out. Actually, no. My name is Jim.
My name is Jim.
[00:08:12] Speaker C: I don't like that.
[00:08:12] Speaker A: That's a little like that. If I may say a little basic.
[00:08:15] Speaker C: I'm going to change your name. I have that power, actually.
[00:08:19] Speaker A: Yeah. Here's that stamp that you need to do that.
[00:08:22] Speaker C: Thanks. You know what? Get out of here. Go to your stupid club.
[00:08:26] Speaker A: Yes. So just show up. We're going to have the big opening at nine. And bring that toaster.
[00:08:32] Speaker B: I don't want to anymore.
[00:08:33] Speaker A: No, come on. I'll knock them. Drink off your minimum. You only need to buy one drink.
[00:08:40] Speaker B: My toaster doesn't smell. It doesn't need a bath.
It's fine.
[00:08:45] Speaker A: Yeah, he wasn't saying that. He was saying you should leave it plugged in and put it in the bath with you so that you kill yourself.
[00:08:54] Speaker B: Oh, I see.
[00:08:56] Speaker C: Thanks for explaining that, Adam.
[00:09:01] Speaker B: Run on electricity.
[00:09:03] Speaker A: So, can I ask a question, though, before you leave in a huff? Does it generate the power to do the toasting through the centrifugal force of the wheels as you drag it along?
[00:09:15] Speaker B: Oh, that's a good question. I should try that out.
[00:09:19] Speaker A: I'm not saying it's the best way to do it, but you'd think in 2000 iterations, someone would have thought maybe we should try it this way. How does it work?
[00:09:27] Speaker B: Try that. What?
[00:09:28] Speaker A: How does it work? Or does it. Yeah, it looks cool when you take the bread out. Is it toast, or is it just, like, decorative?
[00:09:38] Speaker B: Who are you against?
[00:09:40] Speaker A: I work for the city.
[00:09:42] Speaker B: So why do you need to know so much about my toaster?
[00:09:45] Speaker A: I don't need.
[00:09:46] Speaker B: Are you going to tax me on my toaster?
[00:09:48] Speaker A: Well, did you pay tax on it? Because if you didn't, and if you didn't pay sales tax on the last 2000 iterations either, we're coming for that as well. Sorry, 1999.
[00:09:58] Speaker B: I'm out of here. This place sucks.
[00:10:00] Speaker A: All right, take the flyer. Take it. I'll put it in the toaster.
[00:10:02] Speaker C: Get out of here. Go away.
[00:10:04] Speaker B: As Jim gets a block away, you see the flyer lights up in flames.
[00:10:09] Speaker A: Well, so it does work.
So, Alex, that was the first person I've talked to.
So it went well? I would say that's one of one good showing up. Rsvp'd basically for dance club for swingles.
[00:10:27] Speaker C: What dance club?
[00:10:28] Speaker A: Remember when you were doing your.
I don't know what else to call it, but. Whiskey.
Don't make fun of how I pronounce Eminem.
[00:10:43] Speaker C: God damn. You want some Simon in for that?
[00:10:47] Speaker A: Fuck you remember when you were doing that and you were wasted out of your mind, and we slid all those papers in front of you?
[00:10:54] Speaker C: Believe it or not, no, I don't remember.
[00:10:57] Speaker A: This was before we lost Mike.
He had a lot of proposals.
I had a lot of proposals that weren't getting traction with you, so we figured we would just give them to you when you're a little more jovial. And you signed all of them.
[00:11:15] Speaker C: So you got me drunk and then got me to sign a bunch of shit. Including an authorization for this club that is called swingle.
[00:11:25] Speaker A: To be clear. You made clear. You made your intention to perform the whiskey procedure.
Well known and well in advance.
So we didn't get you drunk.
[00:11:43] Speaker C: Just let me know how deep in the hole are we if this doesn't work?
[00:11:46] Speaker A: So, I gave you a small business grant application from Diane and Reginald, who are opening the swing club. And they were requesting $50,000 for the first tranche and $25,000 tranches every four years after that.
And. Okay, tax breaks. Big tax breaks. They don't want us to tax the olives that they put in the martinis.
[00:12:19] Speaker C: How do I put this?
This is bad.
[00:12:22] Speaker A: Why?
Swing is back.
[00:12:25] Speaker C: Says who?
[00:12:26] Speaker A: Well, that guy Jim. He's coming.
[00:12:30] Speaker C: Yeah, but I kind of don't want him to come.
[00:12:32] Speaker A: I know, but it's good for business here. If we get enough other people, I personally will tell him not to come. Hold on. Is that your phone or mine? We're standing very close to each other and our pockets are touching, so I can't tell if it's your vibration or mine.
[00:12:49] Speaker C: It's mine. Who calls you? What?
[00:12:52] Speaker B: Hello, darling. It's Reginald. How you doing? Tonight's the opening night. Are you ready?
[00:12:58] Speaker C: Oh, I'm ready. Reggie, are you ready?
[00:13:00] Speaker B: I am so ready. We have $60,000 worth of tax free olives. We have $25,000 worth of DJ equipment. This is going to be a great night. How many people are coming?
[00:13:14] Speaker C: Oh, man. You won't be able to count how many people are coming. How high can you count?
[00:13:20] Speaker B: I can't count. Pretty dang high.
[00:13:23] Speaker C: What, like more than two?
Yeah, that's a joke.
No, of course.
[00:13:32] Speaker B: Opening night.
[00:13:33] Speaker C: No, of course. There's going to be at least two. Way more than that. Ten, possibly.
The people that come, they're going to love the olives so that we're all going to be eaten. We're going to be fine.
We're going to showcase. We're going to have a talk about everybody loves Raymond there.
[00:13:55] Speaker B: Swing club. Why are we talking about Raymond at a swing?
[00:13:58] Speaker A: Is he bulking at the live podcast recording? I had a feeling he would bulk at the live podcast recording, Reg.
[00:14:05] Speaker C: Okay, well, we'll can that fine, but then we got to do it here. So, Reggie, you want to talk about everybody loves Raymond with me for five minutes?
[00:14:13] Speaker B: I have to go call all of my vendors to see. They will return.
[00:14:18] Speaker C: Okay.
So what did you think of the episode?
[00:14:23] Speaker B: I have work to do, man.
[00:14:25] Speaker A: We're going to begin.
[00:14:27] Speaker C: He's gotten to the point where he's not speaking English anymore, so I just hung.
[00:14:30] Speaker A: Yeah, I overheard a little bit of that. Did he spend the entire $50,000 on olives?
[00:14:38] Speaker C: Maybe. Yeah, maybe a lot. Yeah.
[00:14:41] Speaker A: That is not what he put on his application.
[00:14:44] Speaker C: This is bad. Well, it seems we got to get a lot of people in for this event. And you know what? I'll help you.
[00:14:53] Speaker A: Oh, good.
[00:14:54] Speaker C: I'll take some flyers and I'll run around and I'll find someone else to give flyers to.
[00:15:00] Speaker A: Yeah, let me do a quick calculation here. So we've got the two drink minimum and we've got the $50 cover charge, which we didn't tell Jim about because he would.
[00:15:09] Speaker C: Hey, is Mike alive yet? We should have him help with us.
[00:15:14] Speaker A: I think so. I'll text him.
Hey, Mike, you up?
Send.
[00:15:23] Speaker B: No.
Captain Tommy, can I get off the boat now?
[00:15:44] Speaker A: We were kind of hoping that you would ask pretty soon. It's been a couple days.
We sort of thought that once we docked, you would be getting off the boat, but.
[00:15:56] Speaker B: I'm so sorry. I didn't expect to wake up from death like I did there. It's been a long day. I kind of expected there to be like a black pearl kind of joining ceremony or something like that, but no.
[00:16:13] Speaker A: We pulled you out of the crab net and there you were.
[00:16:16] Speaker C: I wanted to eat you.
[00:16:17] Speaker A: And we almost did. We got the butter out and everything, but we just couldn't break the bones with that little crab tool.
[00:16:25] Speaker C: Yeah, we were as hungry for you. So we were getting some butter.
It was going to be fun.
[00:16:32] Speaker A: Seamus was maybe more excited than the.
[00:16:35] Speaker B: Rest of us about Seamus seems really excited about eating.
[00:16:40] Speaker C: You know, we were going to. Boy, you know how it is.
[00:16:45] Speaker A: Yeah, I do at this point. So I'm going to suggest if you haven't picked up on it, you might want to get off the fucking boat now.
[00:16:54] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:16:55] Speaker B: Yeah, I got to go. I think I got a text for doing a swing club. You guys single?
[00:17:04] Speaker A: Hold on. I was going to say we don't care about that, but I am single.
[00:17:10] Speaker B: Yeah. How about Seamus? Seamus, you single?
[00:17:13] Speaker C: I'm married to a wife and have four kids. And we love each other. We make love every night.
You know how it is, buddy.
[00:17:20] Speaker A: It's true.
[00:17:20] Speaker B: That sounds wonderful.
Seamus. How interested.
[00:17:23] Speaker C: But, yeah, I'll go.
[00:17:24] Speaker B: Adultery? Yeah, I was going to say. All right.
So again, I just woke up, I don't know, 100%. What's going on here. I got text that we're doing swingles club, so if you're interested in some hot, swinging dancing, come on down.
[00:17:49] Speaker A: All right, that's really light on details, so I'm going to need to know a time and a place.
Seamus's game. But I have other things I need to do today. I've got to pull in the sales. I've got to do the whole monger. I've got a.
[00:18:08] Speaker B: Get that.
[00:18:09] Speaker C: I've got a monger right here. It's called one piece.
[00:18:13] Speaker B: I get that. You listen, captain, I want you to be there. Don't get me wrong, you should come. I really need Seamus to be there. Seamus is going to.
[00:18:25] Speaker A: He does have good energy. He does have good energy. Whenever we go to an improv show, they sit Seamus right at the front because he laughs and he laughs big.
[00:18:33] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:34] Speaker A: And we often do.
It's something we like to do together as a crew is sort of like go.
We go to an improv show. We give the suggestion. It's usually something like the sea.
And that's pretty much the only one that we offer up. You just do the c. It's a great bonding experience. I recommend it for teams. I recommend it for, like, corporate events. It's great.
[00:19:00] Speaker B: Great. Awesome. Okay.
[00:19:02] Speaker A: At our last shareholders meeting, we had the wacky bunch come and they. Oh, man. See, we slipped them at 20 and told them, mention how Dale is lactose intolerant. And they worked it in Seamlessly. You wouldn't even think we paid him to do it.
Do you know the wacky bunch?
[00:19:20] Speaker B: I'd love the wacky bunch. Is Dale okay with you mocking his lactose intolerant?
[00:19:25] Speaker A: We lost Dale to the sea a couple of weeks ago, about the time that we found you.
I had just told his widow that we lost him to the.
[00:19:40] Speaker C: Yeah, we really say, see you later. Am I right?
[00:19:44] Speaker A: Seamus did say that immediately after we lost him. And I think most of the, even.
[00:19:49] Speaker C: Before his head was under the water, he was like.
[00:19:52] Speaker A: It was in poor taste. And then when I called Dale's widow to tell him, Seamus said it again and it hit better with her. I will say she found it pretty funny. And I think that was the shock.
[00:20:06] Speaker B: Can you get Dale's widow to come to swingles tonight?
[00:20:10] Speaker A: Can I? Or is it my dream, too? Because I've always been in love with Dale's widow.
[00:20:16] Speaker B: Either.
[00:20:18] Speaker A: I'm going to go with the latter because that's my motivation.
[00:20:23] Speaker B: You can do that. I believe in you. Captain.
[00:20:25] Speaker A: My name is Captain Thomas Kincaid. No relation. Look it up.
[00:20:31] Speaker C: You have a last name?
[00:20:32] Speaker A: Yes, I do.
[00:20:34] Speaker C: How about that? I don't. Last name is so funny.
Anyway.
[00:20:38] Speaker A: So put me on the list is what I'm saying.
[00:20:41] Speaker B: All right, you got it. You got it.
[00:20:43] Speaker A: And that's Seamus. And no country recognizes him as a human life.
He's unregistered so far.
[00:20:58] Speaker B: Just looking at you, that does indeed check out. All right, well, I'll see you at swingles tonight at eight.
By the way, does anyone know what episode of everybody loves Raymond was airing on TV while I was out?
[00:21:13] Speaker A: Season three, episode 24, dancing with Deborah.
[00:21:19] Speaker B: Okay, can you tell me about it a little bit?
[00:21:21] Speaker C: Yeah, sure. That's the one where Robert goes out with Deborah because Deborah. Because Robert can't find a dance partner, and Deborah wants to go out dancing because Ray never wants to do nothing. And then Ray gets jealous because Deborah and Robert are having fun and not acknowledging him while they're having fun. You know how it is. And then Raven tries to sabotage it because he doesn't like that they're doing things involving him, and then they find out, and they get mad and they yell at him, and then he's sad.
[00:21:43] Speaker A: That was great, Seamus.
[00:21:45] Speaker C: It was, yeah.
[00:21:47] Speaker B: Yeah. So, can you tell me what you thought of this, love?
[00:21:51] Speaker A: I thought this was particularly the scene in the swing club. This was a really well executed episode. It's a terrible episode for Rey as a human being, I'll give you that. But I thought the premise of the episode was really well executed. I liked how cinematic the swing club scene was. I would say, like most episodes, I know. I've heard your podcast. Like most episodes, when Ray's bad, the episode's good.
[00:22:22] Speaker B: I understand.
I'm not saying I disagree with you, but for someone that is very excited to cuck his recently deceased shipmate, I.
[00:22:35] Speaker A: Know this sounds bad, what I'm about to say, but it's not cucking if they're dead.
[00:22:40] Speaker B: Okay, that feels.
[00:22:42] Speaker A: That's both very cruel statements.
[00:22:46] Speaker C: Mike, you might want to text your podcast buddies, because that might be a good title for the episode right there.
It's not cooking if they're dead.
[00:22:55] Speaker B: So. Yeah, that's the thing. It's just such a. Don't. I'm not one to judge. I'm just saying, I don't know if you, particularly, Captain Tommy, are the kind of person to be throwing stones at Ray over just. I don't know. That's just.
[00:23:11] Speaker A: I hope. I look forward to hearing the episode that you and your friends put out that discusses this, because I'd like to see just how many people agree with me and write in the reviews that you can fuck off.
[00:23:27] Speaker B: Okay. Again, I'm not arguing that it is not technically cocking. That kind of makes sense to me, but I'm just saying to make that point. Quote, a few weeks after the death of your buddy. Feels a little soon to be making that distinction.
[00:23:44] Speaker A: Her name is Lindsay Williams.
Put her on the list and reserve us a table at the front.
[00:23:54] Speaker B: Are you sure you don't want.
[00:23:56] Speaker A: Okay, yeah, I can make and give Seamus, for reasons that we don't need to go into, will require a booster seat. So just make sure.
[00:24:07] Speaker C: Not for me.
[00:24:10] Speaker A: We don't need to go into it.
[00:24:12] Speaker B: Okay, cool. Got it. Understood.
[00:24:14] Speaker C: All right.
[00:24:14] Speaker A: Get off the fucking boat.
[00:24:16] Speaker B: All right, swim.
[00:24:18] Speaker A: Yeah, swim.
He left me on three bubbles. He's just on the three bubbles. So I don't know if he's. I guess that means he's alive.
[00:24:29] Speaker C: His phone could be dead.
[00:24:31] Speaker A: His phone could be dead. Does that still happen if your phone is dead, that the three bubbles go?
[00:24:36] Speaker C: Well, that's what I tell people.
[00:24:38] Speaker A: Okay.
Hey, did we decide that we were going to record the podcast on the street? Is that what you told Reggie?
[00:24:48] Speaker C: Yep. All right, that's what I told Reggie. And, yeah, we're doing it now. Just mean, if this doesn't work, we got to get used to recording on the streets is all I'm saying.
[00:24:59] Speaker A: Okay, so I'll take north Catalpa, you take South Katalpa, and we'll just try to hand out as many of these as we can. I printed 500.
[00:25:10] Speaker C: All right, I'll take five. All right, there we go. Hundred and you take the rest. All right, see you.
[00:25:18] Speaker A: Yeah. You took five sheets off the top.
[00:25:22] Speaker C: I'm the best.
[00:25:24] Speaker A: Oh, Mike just texted back.
Send help.
That's vague, but I guess that means he's alive. Where you at?
Okay, we cut to Mike crawling up the beach, up Jones beach, classic castaway style.
[00:25:48] Speaker B: Where fuck am I?
[00:25:51] Speaker C: Wow. That's the biggest fish I ever caught.
[00:25:55] Speaker B: Seamus.
[00:25:57] Speaker C: No.
[00:25:58] Speaker B: Okay. Thank God.
[00:26:00] Speaker A: Brother.
[00:26:02] Speaker B: You're his brother?
[00:26:04] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:26:05] Speaker B: You look just like him.
[00:26:07] Speaker C: I'm Ramis. It's nice to meet you.
[00:26:12] Speaker B: Ramis. Thank you for fishing me out of the water here. I was not doing good.
[00:26:20] Speaker C: You look nasty.
Too tough to eat. You really not good fish.
[00:26:25] Speaker B: Yeah, not a good fish.
[00:26:28] Speaker C: As a compliment, once I caught and hooked a fish the size of a king, it was amazing. Yeah, he escaped.
[00:26:38] Speaker B: Oh, no, that's too much. Ramis, could you get me to shore at all?
[00:26:45] Speaker C: We're on the.
[00:26:46] Speaker B: Oh, I thought I was in the boat. I thought I was. Okay, I'm all turned around here.
[00:26:52] Speaker C: The scene has not been properly set. We're on the beach.
[00:26:54] Speaker A: We cut to Mike crawling up Jones beach.
Clear. Now, dumbass.
[00:27:05] Speaker C: Yeah, I parked my boat on the beach.
I don't like the waves.
[00:27:11] Speaker B: You don't like the way you're a sea fisherman?
Listen, Ramis, I need help here. I'm too tired.
[00:27:21] Speaker C: Yeah, you do.
[00:27:22] Speaker B: I'm too weak. I didn't like how quickly you agreed with that.
I need to get to Swinkle's bar down on Katalpa and Phillips Plaza. Can you make that happen?
[00:27:36] Speaker C: No problem. Get in. I'll start rowing.
[00:27:38] Speaker B: Okay, great.
You're doing great. Keep going, Ramis.
You know what would make this even better? Could you tell me what you thought of this week's episode of everybody loves Raymond? There wasn't a lot of fishing in it, so I don't know if you would if it really struck your thought, but have you ever been dancing with a woman?
[00:28:03] Speaker C: No. I said, believe it or not.
Yes. A woman I like to call danger.
[00:28:11] Speaker B: Oh, look at that.
[00:28:14] Speaker C: Very on the nose name. But she was nice.
She told me that I was a special young lad. This was many years ago. Four to be exact.
Four years ago we did the dirty tango, which is just a name of a dance, not sex.
And then my pants fell down in the middle of the dance club. And, well, now I'm not allowed near dance clubs.
[00:28:45] Speaker B: You're not allowed near dance clubs?
[00:28:49] Speaker C: It's a nice way of saying that I'm an accidental sex offender.
[00:28:57] Speaker A: Because his pants fell down while he was doing the dirty tango.
[00:29:04] Speaker C: Well, there was another word for the dance. It's called the helicopter.
[00:29:11] Speaker B: You know, I'm going to be honest, I was going to invite you to a club tonight. I really don't know if I want you to bust out the helicopter at this.
[00:29:20] Speaker C: No, it's okay. I think my brother will be there. I don't want to be there if he's there.
[00:29:24] Speaker B: You don't get along with.
[00:29:26] Speaker C: No no. He has very different opinions about everybody loves Raymond than what was, what was.
[00:29:31] Speaker B: Your opinion of everybody loves Raymond this week?
[00:29:34] Speaker C: I thought that Ray was kind of in the wrong, believe it or not, controversial. I know. I'm usually so agreeable with him.
[00:29:50] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:29:50] Speaker C: I really relate to everything he says and does.
[00:29:54] Speaker B: I can tell that.
Did this have anything to do with senor Navel? Because I know that turned a lot of people off to begin.
[00:30:01] Speaker C: That was hilarious. That was the funniest shit I've ever seen. Okay, that's so funny.
[00:30:09] Speaker B: That got you.
[00:30:10] Speaker C: Okay, I shit myself.
And then I saw the episode and laughed.
[00:30:19] Speaker B: All right, I'm sorry for insulting Mr. Navel there.
[00:30:25] Speaker A: What did somebody call for Mr. Navel.
My name is Lewis Navel.
Do you need me to move my old mobile?
[00:30:45] Speaker B: I would love for you to move your old mobile, Mr. Navel. I'm sorry. You're so old and short that I thought coming from Ramis's belly button, and I got very scared this was going well.
[00:30:57] Speaker A: I wish I still had a belly button.
[00:30:59] Speaker B: You talk about belly button.
[00:31:01] Speaker A: Well, back in my day, if you got malnourishment during the Depression.
I don't mean the Great Depression. I mean, if you were malnourished while you were depressed. They didn't have the pharmaceuticals that they have these days. They just started cutting. So I ended up with. That's why I'm missing one of my pinky toes.
I don't have a toenail on the top of my left big foot either. There was mostly foot stuff. You know, maybe I wasn't going to a doctor.
Sorry.
I'm having a little bit of a revelation. I'm having a little bit of a senior moment, so maybe don't talk to me anymore. I thought you were calling my name.
[00:31:47] Speaker B: Hold on. Before you go. I have never been more interested in a human being than I am interested in you, Mr. Navel.
[00:31:55] Speaker C: Well, I'm hurt by Mr. Navel.
[00:32:01] Speaker A: Hop aboard. Oh, let me get on in here. How are you doing?
[00:32:05] Speaker C: I'm paddling.
[00:32:06] Speaker A: I can see that.
[00:32:07] Speaker C: You're doing a great job. Let's see. We've traveled 3ft. It's going well.
[00:32:13] Speaker A: Yeah, you're doing great. You're doing great. And your tries look fantastic.
[00:32:18] Speaker C: They feel fantastic.
[00:32:20] Speaker A: We both get the senior discount at the gym.
[00:32:23] Speaker B: Yeah, I believe that. Listen, you're swole, Mr. Navel. I got to say.
Is there a Mrs. Navel on the picture?
[00:32:34] Speaker A: There was.
She left me.
[00:32:37] Speaker B: She left you?
[00:32:38] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:32:39] Speaker B: So she's single?
[00:32:42] Speaker A: No, she's married to my former tennis partner and best friend, Brian.
[00:32:48] Speaker C: Brian Backhand.
[00:32:49] Speaker A: Brian Backhand. Thank you, Brian Backhand.
[00:32:55] Speaker B: I'm sorry.
I didn't know this was going to be a sore subject for you.
[00:33:00] Speaker A: Well, it's just. You spend your years learning tennis from at the feet of someone, and then he turns around.
Don't.
[00:33:14] Speaker B: I was trying to sympathize. I thought it was going to be okay. I'm sorry.
[00:33:17] Speaker A: He turns around and betrays you. Cucks you right there. Wasn't even dead yet.
[00:33:22] Speaker B: That is when it's still cooking.
[00:33:24] Speaker A: Yeah, but I do know that they swing, they're open, they're poly. So if you're looking for singles, they're as single as the next guy, I.
[00:33:34] Speaker B: Would love for them to come to a swingles club tonight. We're having swingles. We do swing dancing with singles.
[00:33:41] Speaker A: Who's we?
[00:33:43] Speaker B: Oh, hi. I represent the podcast everybody loves everybody loves Raymond. You've probably heard of us because we play it at all hours of the night at top volume.
[00:33:52] Speaker A: They probably play it in the line at the DMV. Yeah, and I'm always at the Mm.
[00:33:58] Speaker B: I can tell that right there, that is a rust bucket that you were trying to get started.
[00:34:03] Speaker A: Yeah, well, it's hot out. And when it's hot, it melts.
[00:34:10] Speaker C: It does melt, Mr. Navel.
[00:34:13] Speaker A: And I'm not talking about my feet, although I am.
[00:34:17] Speaker B: I understand that. Could you tell me, have you ever. Now listen, you've clearly experienced jealousy with the Brian backhand. Could you tell me, how do you think Ray did handling jealousy in season three, episode 24?
[00:34:32] Speaker A: I'll say. Poor, poor for sure. I could tell from the moment that Robert and Deborah come home, they're having a great time. And Ray is just glad that he got to stay home and watch TV. And then he finds out that they're seeing each other on Saturday for more fun. And then you can just tell he flips that switch where he says he doesn't mind, but he clearly does. And I knew from there that it was going to be a nightmare. And you know what? It was?
[00:35:02] Speaker C: It was a nightmare.
[00:35:03] Speaker A: The way he fucked with their lives. It reminds me of the way Brian fucked with mine.
Except there was a lot less tennis. And full frontal in this one.
[00:35:18] Speaker C: Reminds me of my helicopter days. Full frontal.
[00:35:22] Speaker A: Anyway, I remember when you did that. That's how we know each other. We played tennis together one time before he was ejected from the club.
He didn't have a paddle. I'll just say that.
And he showed off his helicopter move. You connect the dots.
[00:35:38] Speaker B: I know. I pieced it together.
[00:35:39] Speaker A: And speaking of connecting, he did with the ball and scored on me.
[00:35:43] Speaker B: Oh, yeah? Really?
[00:35:46] Speaker A: Match point.
[00:35:48] Speaker B: I like that little laugh that Ramos did just then.
[00:35:51] Speaker A: He's proud of himself.
[00:35:52] Speaker B: Yeah, I could tell. I could tell. I would be too. I would be too. So what would your advice be for someone that was dealing with jealousy among his brother, even if in theory, let's say, this particular set of jealousy does not involve tennis?
[00:36:07] Speaker A: Well, first of all, I'm an older man. I've had many experiences outside of being cucked. So don't limit.
[00:36:16] Speaker B: You could talk about any one of them. This might not be the only instance of you being jealous.
[00:36:22] Speaker A: So my first marriage, before I was left I was jealous. I was very jealous. And she's just an extrovert, and I was more of an introvert. So she would always be glad handing with people at parties, making them laugh. And I wanted to make her laugh myself.
Well, at the end of the day, I realized that I was just insecure. And it was coming from a lack of trust.
It's my insecurity, my lack of trust, that makes me feel threatened when I see her having a good time, when really I should just be happy that she's having a good time and trust that if I hold up my end of the marriage, which I didn't, we'll have a good time, too.
[00:37:17] Speaker B: Okay, so I was going to say this was significantly less interesting than the cucking story.
[00:37:22] Speaker A: Yeah, this was really the reason was emotional distress and irreconcilable differences. That's what we put in front of the judge. And he said, I can tell.
[00:37:34] Speaker B: Okay, that checks out. All right.
[00:37:37] Speaker A: And with my second wife, it was cucked. That's what we put on the forms. And the judge said, I can tell.
[00:37:48] Speaker B: The judge was well aware. Brian Beckhand, I know, was famously a judge of the second district court.
[00:37:53] Speaker A: Yeah, he was the judge. So it was on my lawyer. He should have moved for a mistrial, but he said no.
My lawyer said no. Because as I found out later, my lawyer was the first person to cuck me in this.
[00:38:13] Speaker B: You, your wife.
[00:38:15] Speaker A: Sounds like a party. She got the taste for it and then went after Brian Backhand, my tennis partner. Could you taste for cucking?
[00:38:22] Speaker B: Could you do me a favor and call all of these people and invite them to swingles tonight, 07:00 p.m.
[00:38:30] Speaker A: I'll call my lawyer. I've been blocked by my ex wife and Brian.
[00:38:36] Speaker B: Okay, that's fine.
[00:38:37] Speaker A: I'll call my lawyer. His name is Arnold, South Carolina.
Hyphenated Arnold, South Carolina.
[00:38:47] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, he's the guy with the signs on the billboards when you drive into Limbrook. He says, when it comes to lawyering, size matters. And I'm not talking about the firm. And then a winky face. Yeah, that's the one.
[00:39:00] Speaker A: Yeah. And then in smaller text under it, it says, but it is firm. But it is firm. Yeah, he's my lawyer.
I saw the commercials just like everyone else. I saw him pull up on his Harley, and I saw him conspicuously adjust his crotch region because he's.
Because he's so big down there.
[00:39:21] Speaker B: He's very hung.
[00:39:23] Speaker A: He's very hung.
He said, don't worry about a hung jury. Worry about a hung. Something else. I bought it.
I called 1800 big dick. That is the right number of letters.
I think you'll find that's the right number of letters.
[00:39:46] Speaker B: You will indeed. And I will say, good for your wife.
[00:39:51] Speaker A: And what's smart about my lawyer. Sorry. What's smart about Arnold, Caroline, is that he also got 1800 big cock, which is also the right number of letters.
[00:40:01] Speaker B: All right, well, excellent. I can't wait to meet all these people there. Hey, you know what? I'm just realizing now it's getting close to 07:00. Hey, Ramis.
[00:40:12] Speaker C: Yes?
[00:40:13] Speaker B: Could you do me a favor and pick it up a little?
If there's any way you could get a motor going, I would appreciate it.
[00:40:20] Speaker C: No, it's okay. We just made it to my car, so if you can help me load the boat in, we can start driving.
[00:40:24] Speaker B: Oh, even better. I was expecting you to turn around and helicopter, but that's okay.
[00:40:31] Speaker C: So stupid.
Let's go.
[00:40:35] Speaker A: Can we stop at the DMV on the way, please? Thanks.
[00:40:40] Speaker B: Come on, we got to go. All right, man.
I hope that this setup is going well.
[00:40:46] Speaker C: The setup is not going well. Please take the flyers.
[00:40:50] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:40:50] Speaker B: Oh, my God.
[00:40:50] Speaker A: You guys, I'll take.
[00:40:52] Speaker B: Got to get the olives out of here.
[00:40:54] Speaker A: I'll take a flyer.
[00:40:59] Speaker C: Take two flyers today. Give one to a friend.
[00:41:02] Speaker A: I don't have a lot of friends, but I will take two.
[00:41:07] Speaker C: Make a friend.
[00:41:09] Speaker A: Can I make a friend here?
[00:41:11] Speaker C: No, I'm not your friend.
[00:41:12] Speaker A: No, not you, friend. I mean, when you guys open, it looks nice.
Are the boards going to come off the windows?
[00:41:24] Speaker C: Yeah, just come tonight, okay?
[00:41:26] Speaker B: You didn't have enough in the budget. You only give us $50,000. We have to spend it all on.
[00:41:29] Speaker A: Who is this sweaty man who appears to be having a crisis? Is he part of this or will he be gone?
[00:41:37] Speaker C: That's Mr. Schwetty. He's fine.
[00:41:39] Speaker B: Yes, Mr. Reginald Sweaty. It's a pleasure to meet you.
[00:41:43] Speaker C: No, Schwetty.
[00:41:44] Speaker B: Schwetty? Yes, that's me.
I appreciate you being excited for the setup, sir.
[00:41:51] Speaker A: I'm excited.
[00:41:53] Speaker B: Tonight is going to be all about swing dancing. You're going to do some dancing, you're going to meet some nice ladies or men.
We got all sorts of people here. We're going to give you some olives. You're going to have a good time. Okay?
[00:42:08] Speaker A: Okay. Spread the. Can I inquire and maybe this is a surprise. Maybe it'll become clear once we're in there.
What do you mean you're going to give me some olives.
[00:42:25] Speaker B: This is going to sell it. This is going to sell it. You know those things that they put in drinks?
[00:42:30] Speaker A: No, I know what olives are.
[00:42:32] Speaker B: Okay, good.
[00:42:36] Speaker A: Hey, I don't know if this is part of it. Look, I'm all for an experience. I would be happy to experience whatever it is.
I want to be immersed.
[00:42:50] Speaker B: Some olives.
[00:42:50] Speaker A: So you don't have to tell me.
[00:42:51] Speaker B: Why he can immerse you in olives.
[00:42:55] Speaker A: What is this again? He said this was a dance club.
[00:42:59] Speaker C: This is.
[00:43:00] Speaker B: It. Swingles.
[00:43:02] Speaker A: That's what it says on the sign.
[00:43:03] Speaker C: It swingles.
[00:43:04] Speaker B: It swingles.
[00:43:05] Speaker A: Okay. And the olives are part of it?
[00:43:08] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:43:09] Speaker A: Okay. Are you going to take a shower before I come back because you're wet.
[00:43:18] Speaker B: Okay. Yes.
[00:43:20] Speaker C: It's opening night. He's nervous.
[00:43:22] Speaker B: We'll have a communal shower and we'll have a good time. That would make you happy. That would get you here.
[00:43:28] Speaker A: Shaking head? No. Shaking head. No.
[00:43:30] Speaker B: We'll put your name on the list. Yeah.
[00:43:32] Speaker A: Thank you. Yes. Put my name. Which is.
My name is Tim Ebo.
[00:43:40] Speaker B: Okay?
[00:43:41] Speaker A: No relation.
[00:43:42] Speaker C: You're on the list. Tim Ebo.
[00:43:45] Speaker B: Put times 400 olives. This is a good one.
[00:43:48] Speaker C: You should get some 400 olives.
[00:43:51] Speaker A: Can I say no? Sorry.
Never mind. Goodbye.
[00:43:57] Speaker C: Goodbye. All right. Well, now that he's over, he's not.
[00:44:01] Speaker B: Going to come now. You just were rude to me.
[00:44:03] Speaker C: People don't cut the clubs to talk. You ever come to a club and talk? It gets all sounded out by the band. By the way, that little visual gag at the end of Raymond. Great visual gag. I'm hoping for some visual gags like that tonight with the band themselves.
You saw it, right?
[00:44:21] Speaker B: Which visual gag are you talking about? Yes, about the one.
[00:44:26] Speaker C: No good. The one where Ray gets dragged to dancing by Deborah due to a result of his own shitty actions that he did not consider the fallout from. And then turns out Robert's there because. Of course he's there because he thought Deborah didn't want to go with him, so he found someone else. And then they start arguing with each other over the music. And then they both turned to Ray at the same time. That's a great visual gag. It tells you the story without the aggressive dancing. Yes. And they start tangoing towards Ray.
[00:44:59] Speaker A: I felt very.
[00:45:00] Speaker C: That was good.
[00:45:01] Speaker B: That was great.
[00:45:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:45:02] Speaker C: That was really good.
[00:45:03] Speaker B: That was great.
[00:45:04] Speaker C: You think we're going to get some of that tonight? You think we're going to get any angry couples tonight?
[00:45:08] Speaker B: Listen, if there's one thing I know about olives, it makes people very angry.
[00:45:13] Speaker C: Well, we got a lot of olives.
How's the margarita coming?
[00:45:17] Speaker A: Hey, I think you'll notice no flyers in my hands because I gave away 495 fucking flyers for your fucking. Whatever this is.
[00:45:32] Speaker C: Hey, Adam, good job. Glad you're finally pulling your own weight.
[00:45:35] Speaker A: Thanks, Alex. That means a lot. I really thrive on your encouragement.
[00:45:39] Speaker C: Here, you want to hand out my remaining four?
[00:45:43] Speaker A: Sure. Fine.
[00:45:45] Speaker C: Thanks, buddy.
[00:45:45] Speaker A: Okay, I appreciate. I'm going to run to that house across the street and just put them in the mailbox, because I know for a fact that that's a family of four.
[00:45:54] Speaker B: Yeah, go do that. Go do that. I'm going to go get the shower.
[00:45:58] Speaker C: All set up, and I'm going to go take a nap.
[00:46:01] Speaker B: No. What are you. You doing? Can't.
[00:46:05] Speaker C: Oh, hello.
[00:46:07] Speaker A: Hi.
Let me read the mailbox here. Your name is Gary, right?
[00:46:14] Speaker C: Yes, my name is Gary Goatley.
[00:46:18] Speaker A: Gary Goatley. Right. G. Goatley. So then, these are for you and the three members of your household. I'm from the city and.
[00:46:30] Speaker C: Are we in trouble?
[00:46:31] Speaker A: Good. Look at the flyer.
[00:46:32] Speaker C: Do we have to get sued now?
[00:46:34] Speaker A: No. Now.
[00:46:35] Speaker C: I will fight. I will fight you.
[00:46:38] Speaker A: Hold on.
[00:46:39] Speaker C: Yes, Gertrude.
[00:46:40] Speaker B: Gary, are you getting sued again?
[00:46:42] Speaker A: He's not getting sued.
[00:46:44] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:46:47] Speaker C: Get the kids.
We will be at arms. We fight at dawn.
Yes. Get the battlements ready.
[00:46:58] Speaker A: Okay. Gerhard, we need to get the battlements ready.
[00:47:01] Speaker C: Let me unleash my sword upon this man.
[00:47:03] Speaker A: Whoa, whoa. Everybody calm down. You're not getting sued.
[00:47:08] Speaker C: That's what they all say. That's what the pizza guy said.
That's what those Mormons said.
That's what that Girl scout said. That's what they all say.
[00:47:20] Speaker A: Are you the reason we kill them all? Are you the reason that the New York Post ran that headline about that pizza guy that got murdered that said peppero?
[00:47:31] Speaker C: No, that was a lawyer in disguise.
[00:47:37] Speaker A: That was a lawyer in disguise. Yes, I'm sure.
[00:47:40] Speaker C: Probably right. Yeah, of course I'm sure.
[00:47:42] Speaker A: Hey, speaking of. And I'll get to why I'm here in a second, do you want this entire salami like a normal person eats?
[00:47:48] Speaker C: He's not a lawyer.
[00:47:49] Speaker B: False alarm.
[00:47:50] Speaker C: Salami?
[00:47:51] Speaker B: Yes, salami.
[00:47:53] Speaker C: Here, I'll break it in half. Half for me, half for my beautiful family.
[00:47:57] Speaker A: Gertrude, catch even distribution.
[00:48:00] Speaker B: Thank you, son.
[00:48:03] Speaker A: I'm here to extend an invitation from the mayor to attend the opening night of the hottest new club in town.
It's called swingles.
Interesting.
[00:48:23] Speaker C: You want me to go to swingles?
[00:48:25] Speaker A: Yeah, it's a swing club. Yeah, we're opening tonight.
[00:48:29] Speaker C: And you want my family to go.
[00:48:31] Speaker A: To swingles if they want.
[00:48:33] Speaker C: Tonight? No, the whole family at swingles. Swingling at night. Me and the family? Yeah, all of us.
[00:48:42] Speaker B: Gary, what did he.
[00:48:45] Speaker C: Uh, nothing, dear. I need a break.
[00:48:50] Speaker A: You need a break? What do you mean? Step outside onto the porch. I don't tell her. Whatever you need to tell her, but let's come out here.
[00:48:58] Speaker C: I'm going to go kill this. Kill this guy. Give me 1 second.
[00:49:02] Speaker B: Don't take smaller bites of the salami.
[00:49:08] Speaker A: So true.
So you're saying you need a break from your wife and kids?
[00:49:18] Speaker C: Yes.
All they do all day and night is watch action movies.
[00:49:23] Speaker A: They do.
[00:49:24] Speaker C: And all I want to do is watch one situational romantic comedy between a man and a woman who find each other in this unlikely world. And I cannot do that.
[00:49:39] Speaker A: You know, I feel the same way. I don't get this 90s mentality of, like, men can't enjoy romantic comedy or a chickflicks. I like Catherine Heigl as much as the next guy. I'll watch Steel magnolias every day if you pay me.
These. These movies are for everyone.
[00:50:02] Speaker C: They're delicious.
[00:50:03] Speaker A: You like the movie?
[00:50:04] Speaker C: For the soul.
[00:50:05] Speaker A: You like the movie? I'm going to throw out a couple and you tell me if you like them or not. Do you like failure to launch?
[00:50:11] Speaker C: That is my favorite movie.
[00:50:13] Speaker A: Okay, that's good, because that's the end of my list. That's a test.
It's a test that psychologists use to determine whether you're ready to launch out of a marriage that you're not happy in anymore. I know that's not the plot of the movie, but it's sort of just analogous.
[00:50:31] Speaker C: I wouldn't know. I've never seen it. But are you saying they're going to play it tonight at swingles?
[00:50:38] Speaker A: They could. I could make.
[00:50:40] Speaker C: Say no more. I'll be there.
[00:50:42] Speaker A: Okay. Will you bring your family? Because I got a clear.
Do you have three friends? Do you have three friends who are single?
[00:50:54] Speaker C: Fine, I'll bring the family.
[00:50:55] Speaker A: Okay, so no friends. That's sad. Okay, I'll go run back across the street now. Thanks for everything.
[00:51:03] Speaker C: Gary Goatley.
[00:51:04] Speaker A: Gary Goatley and the family coming in the lava.
[00:51:09] Speaker B: He's putting up the thumbs up. It's great.
[00:51:12] Speaker A: Arnold.
[00:51:12] Speaker B: No.
[00:51:14] Speaker C: Can we watch the notebook, please?
[00:51:16] Speaker B: Shut up.
[00:51:18] Speaker A: Shut up.
[00:51:18] Speaker C: Damn it.
[00:51:19] Speaker A: Papa. So success cleared those last four flyers. We are going to be open for business. Awesome. Let me ask you a question, though, because this has been on my mind since we watched this episode.
So we know that Ray immediately is not cool with Robert and Debra going out to swing dance on Saturday.
Do you think then Ray worries that they were talking about him. He finds out they didn't talk about him at all, which is a devastating thing for him to hear, but understandable.
[00:52:03] Speaker C: Everything is about Raymond.
[00:52:04] Speaker A: They were dancing.
[00:52:05] Speaker C: Not about Raymond, then. Yeah, of course they didn't talk about. They were dancing. Can't talk while you dance.
[00:52:12] Speaker A: What would they.
[00:52:12] Speaker C: And when you're not dancing, you're talking about dancing.
[00:52:14] Speaker A: That's right. You're preparing to dance. You're learning the steps and everything. You know that better than most.
[00:52:20] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:52:21] Speaker A: So then when Ray tries to put the moves on Deborah and Robert calls, is that the moment where he flips and decides to take away all of their joy in this one thing that brings them happiness?
[00:52:37] Speaker C: I think Ray's projecting a little bit because there's no way in hell he was getting any to begin with.
But also. Yeah, I guess that's the point where he decides this is going too far for him and too far being, again, to reinstate. Too far for him is his brother and his sister are having fun, and he is not directly involved.
[00:52:58] Speaker A: Alex, careful on the sidewalk there. You almost had a little freudian slip. Deborah is his wife.
[00:53:05] Speaker C: What?
Oh, his wife. I did have a freudian slip. Whoops.
[00:53:11] Speaker A: Whoops.
[00:53:12] Speaker C: Glad you caught that, because otherwise we would have been told that all week. My mistake. His brother and his wife having fun, doing a platonic activity together that he is not involved with. And that is too far for.
[00:53:28] Speaker A: And Debra, you know, Robert calling her on the phone and Deborah laughing and having a great time.
[00:53:37] Speaker C: I like when she said, what are.
[00:53:39] Speaker A: You wearing, a zoot suit? So that's the moment, then, where Ray decides to go and basically play these mind games with Robert, where he tells him that Deborah was only dancing with him out of pity and didn't actually.
[00:53:59] Speaker C: What is his goal? What does he think he's going to get out of? Right? Like, he was bummed when Deborah was with him, and then Deborah is not with him, and he's watching movies. And then Deborah comes back and is like, I had fun. And he's like, no, I want to be miserable and force you to sit here with me every night.
[00:54:16] Speaker A: Yeah. He's so self centered. He would rather be miserable and have her under his control, really, than have her be happy out there in the world.
[00:54:31] Speaker C: Like, this is like legit behavior of a serialistic manipulator.
[00:54:36] Speaker A: He's a sociopath.
[00:54:38] Speaker C: Yeah.
His mom has really gotten to him more than I feel like we've realized in the past.
[00:54:45] Speaker A: But I think what's interesting about the difference between. Sir. Come here. Come here. I'm grabbing you by the collar, but.
[00:54:54] Speaker B: I'm not trying to like it.
[00:54:57] Speaker A: Come here, come here, come here.
[00:54:58] Speaker B: Hey, don't do that.
[00:55:00] Speaker A: We want the difference between Marie. Tell me if you agree with this. The difference between Marie and Ray is I feel like Marie, in her mind, justifies everything that she does. I feel like Ray in this scene did not have any justification other than I want to make them unhappy. Do you agree with that?
[00:55:22] Speaker B: I don't know about.
So, yeah, I don't think that Marie has any legitimate justification to things. I think she says it. I think she's better hiding it, but no, she just wants to torture people. She's smarter than that. Don't give her that.
[00:55:36] Speaker A: No, I think it's not a conniving thing. I think it's like she legitimately thinks she's helping Deborah by putting her down in subtle ways.
[00:55:47] Speaker C: Oh, no.
[00:55:48] Speaker B: I think that she just wants Ray to realize that she's the only woman that's worth anything in his life.
[00:55:52] Speaker A: How's your relationship? Hi, I'm Adam. This is Alex. He's the.
[00:55:56] Speaker C: Hi.
[00:55:57] Speaker B: Hi. Oh, yeah. I didn't vote for you.
[00:56:00] Speaker C: Oh, sorry. Get out.
[00:56:03] Speaker A: Fine. We didn't even get to ask him any deeply personal questions.
[00:56:07] Speaker C: Wait, no, come back.
[00:56:08] Speaker B: I'll come back. I'll come back.
[00:56:11] Speaker C: Before we kick you out forever.
[00:56:12] Speaker A: What's your name?
[00:56:14] Speaker B: Hey, I'm Phil.
[00:56:16] Speaker A: Phil.
[00:56:17] Speaker B: I'm Phil. Oh, you want my last name too? You want the entire.
[00:56:23] Speaker A: Am I and any previous names that you've used.
[00:56:28] Speaker B: Okay, no, hold on, hold on. It sounds like the government trying to get in my business again.
[00:56:32] Speaker A: We're trying to get in your business.
[00:56:34] Speaker C: Wait a minute.
[00:56:35] Speaker A: To put you on for this club.
[00:56:38] Speaker C: I know this guy.
[00:56:39] Speaker B: No, you don't.
[00:56:39] Speaker C: This is Phil. Up. Middle name Martin. Fill him up.
[00:56:45] Speaker B: You don't need to do that film. You don't need to do that. You don't need to put me up here.
[00:56:49] Speaker A: Is that up with one.
[00:56:52] Speaker C: Two.
[00:56:53] Speaker A: Got it. So we're just signing you up for this. We're putting you on the list for the club so you don't have to pay a cover charge.
And we're also signing you up for Alex care.
[00:57:06] Speaker B: What?
[00:57:07] Speaker A: So don't worry about it.
[00:57:09] Speaker B: Listen, the gas station doesn't pay minimum wage.
[00:57:13] Speaker A: No, we gave them a waiver. They don't have to.
[00:57:16] Speaker B: They don't have to do minimum wage anymore.
[00:57:17] Speaker C: No, minimum wage is. The minimum wage is. They charge you to work.
[00:57:22] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, that checks out. So that's why it keeps going down. Okay.
[00:57:28] Speaker A: That's why it keeps going down. You have direct withdrawal, right?
[00:57:32] Speaker B: Yeah, that's right.
[00:57:36] Speaker A: All right, so you're on the list. Come back here at nine and we'll give you a zoot suit. Deal.
[00:57:41] Speaker B: Okay. Did you want to ask me any other questions? I'll do the zoot suit, but that's fine.
[00:57:46] Speaker A: Okay. Are you a fan of the late 90s swing revival?
[00:57:50] Speaker B: I love all things swing.
[00:57:53] Speaker A: All things swing?
[00:57:55] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:57:56] Speaker C: What's your favorite swing band song?
[00:57:58] Speaker B: Yeah, swing.
That's the song.
[00:58:03] Speaker A: Singing it or.
[00:58:04] Speaker B: Yeah. No, swing, swing, swing, swing.
[00:58:09] Speaker A: Sing.
[00:58:10] Speaker C: It's not swing, swing, swing.
[00:58:14] Speaker B: I blew it on the mind. Really blew it in the background of the episode, though. I like that part.
[00:58:21] Speaker A: Yeah, it was in the background of the episode. You're right.
[00:58:23] Speaker B: Yeah.
I didn't recognize the other one, though.
[00:58:29] Speaker A: I didn't write down what the other one was.
[00:58:33] Speaker B: This place sucks.
[00:58:34] Speaker A: Yeah, I blew it, too. Look, everyone blows it. The important thing is that tonight people are going to be blowing horns here and each other. Well, we'll see.
[00:58:43] Speaker B: That's kind of odd.
[00:58:44] Speaker A: We bought a lot of tablecloths that go all the way down to the floor, so. It's conducive. I'll say that. It's conducive.
[00:58:53] Speaker C: Yummy, yummy.
[00:58:54] Speaker B: Listen, that's why they call me Conducive, Phil.
[00:59:00] Speaker C: Who calls you that? I thought people just called you Philip.
[00:59:03] Speaker B: No, listen, that was my nickname in college.
[00:59:07] Speaker A: Conducive was your nickname in college.
[00:59:10] Speaker B: My nickname in college?
[00:59:12] Speaker A: No, I'm putting this under other names that you've been known as.
[00:59:16] Speaker B: You don't need to do that. No, my full legal name was my nickname in college. They called him fill them up and I liked it because I was filling them beers up. Then I got a job at the gas station. It just kind of felt a little on the nose, so I kind of didn't like that anymore.
Starting to call to me yet, but give it a couple of weeks, I think it'll catch on.
[00:59:42] Speaker C: Yeah, everyone at the gas station would come up and be like, hey, can you fill it up? And he's like, how do you know my name?
[00:59:47] Speaker A: Yeah, he got really defensive there for a while.
[00:59:49] Speaker B: Yeah, no, I don't like people knowing my name. Hey, what's with the microphone? Is this being recorded?
[00:59:54] Speaker A: No, not for anything. Really.
[00:59:57] Speaker B: Okay, good.
[00:59:58] Speaker A: This is just in case you mention your Social Security number so I can put it on the form later.
[01:00:03] Speaker B: Why would I say.
[01:00:10] Speaker C: We have a listener right now that somebody.
[01:00:11] Speaker A: Real.
[01:00:12] Speaker C: Social Security number, shout out to fucking whatever.
[01:00:23] Speaker A: I think we have everything we need. Just sign here.
[01:00:26] Speaker C: That was funny.
[01:00:27] Speaker A: Okay.
All right. Go away.
[01:00:32] Speaker B: All right.
[01:00:36] Speaker A: Wait, come back. Come back. Sorry, but I want to go home. I wanted to ask you to tell me about the late 90s swing revival, which you claim to know about.
[01:00:46] Speaker B: There was a swing revival in the late 90s?
[01:00:49] Speaker A: Do you want me to give you more information about it?
[01:00:52] Speaker B: It sounded good.
[01:00:54] Speaker A: It sounded good.
[01:00:55] Speaker B: It sounded real good, dude.
[01:00:58] Speaker A: So, this swing revival, most people consider it to have started in 1989 when big bad voodoo daddy formed throughout the 90s.
[01:01:12] Speaker B: College.
What's my nickname in college?
[01:01:16] Speaker A: But your nickname in college was Phil M. Up. But let me get that down.
[01:01:21] Speaker B: I contain multitudes.
[01:01:23] Speaker A: Can I ask, what are these? Are any of these other 1990s swing revival bands? Weren't they your nicknames in college? The Squirrels?
[01:01:33] Speaker B: Yeah, that was one.
[01:01:34] Speaker A: Okay. Royal Crown review.
[01:01:37] Speaker B: Yeah, that was me.
[01:01:38] Speaker A: Brian Setzer Orchestra.
[01:01:41] Speaker B: Yeah, that checks out.
[01:01:42] Speaker A: Okay. And I hope this wasn't one cherry popping daddy's.
[01:01:47] Speaker B: That's what my mom called me.
[01:01:49] Speaker A: Why?
[01:01:50] Speaker C: Ew. That's nasty.
[01:01:53] Speaker B: I don't know.
[01:01:55] Speaker A: Why.
[01:01:56] Speaker B: Call me Cherry pop.
[01:01:58] Speaker A: Were you conceived the night she lost her virginity?
[01:02:03] Speaker B: Shockingly, I don't know how I was conceived.
Me and my mom are kind of close. We're not that close.
[01:02:11] Speaker A: Okay, you're going to have to have your mom fill out that section of this form then.
[01:02:15] Speaker B: I'm Phil.
[01:02:18] Speaker A: You are exhausting.
[01:02:22] Speaker B: You keep bringing me back, man. I don't know.
[01:02:25] Speaker A: License check. Okay, license check. Let me see it. Got to have a license to come in today. We're at capacity. Only registered drivers here. Great.
[01:02:36] Speaker B: All right, well, my ID is kind of at the bottom of the ocean.
[01:02:42] Speaker A: Mike.
[01:02:43] Speaker B: Doug?
[01:02:45] Speaker A: Mike. Oh, my God. I haven't seen you since.
[01:02:50] Speaker B: It was, what, like, high school reunion 82?
[01:02:53] Speaker A: High school reunion 82. I think. Yeah.
[01:02:56] Speaker B: Wow, look at you, man. You look great.
[01:02:58] Speaker A: Are you still with Marie?
[01:03:01] Speaker B: No, we broke it off because it turned out that she was actually mer from the impractical joker, so that's a whole other thing.
That's a whole thing.
[01:03:09] Speaker A: I think there was a Marie before that who might have been tofu.
Do you remember that?
[01:03:16] Speaker B: Listen, there are too many Marie's to keep track of.
[01:03:19] Speaker A: There were a lot of them. Mike. B but.
[01:03:21] Speaker B: Doug. Oh, so good to see you, man. Oh, it's so good to see you.
What's her name?
Cheryl.
[01:03:31] Speaker A: Cheryl. Yeah. She's doing great.
Let's see, if the last time we saw each other was 82, that would make her 42. Now, my daughter is 42.
[01:03:43] Speaker B: Wow.
[01:03:43] Speaker A: Yeah. Believe it or not, time goes fast, man.
[01:03:46] Speaker B: Time goes so fast.
[01:03:48] Speaker A: We have that photo from the reunion of all of our class. Everyone like Lion Kinging Cheryl.
[01:03:59] Speaker B: Yeah.
You always had that stutter, man. Oh, it's great.
[01:04:04] Speaker A: Fuck you, man.
You know how hard I've worked to get over that?
[01:04:10] Speaker B: You've been doing great.
[01:04:11] Speaker A: Remember we were taking those king speech classes together?
[01:04:15] Speaker B: I do remember that. I do remember that. That was great.
We got to meet the king. Oh, it was wonderful.
[01:04:21] Speaker A: Yeah. We were taking that speech pathology course that was taught by an Elvis impersonator.
But now I guess you think you're too good. You've got it completely under control. You can make fun of other people.
[01:04:34] Speaker B: I never said that. I mean, yes, but I never said that.
[01:04:38] Speaker A: Maybe I don't recognize you. And maybe you should go wait in the fucking non registered driver's line, and I'll let my man Ramis and my man Mr. Navel through and. Yeah, so how do you like that? And you know what?
[01:04:56] Speaker B: I don't.
[01:04:57] Speaker A: I'm changing Cheryl's middle name. I know she's 42, and I'm just going to heavily suggest that her middle name no longer be Mike.
[01:05:04] Speaker B: No, come on. I'm our godfather. You can't do that.
[01:05:07] Speaker A: Not anymore.
[01:05:08] Speaker B: Oh, dude.
[01:05:09] Speaker A: No. God is dead. And God is you.
Fuck off.
[01:05:14] Speaker B: What?
That doesn't make any.
[01:05:20] Speaker A: Doug, fuck off. You're done.
[01:05:23] Speaker B: All right.
Doug, are you single?
[01:05:27] Speaker A: What? Hold on. Come back, come back, come back. What?
[01:05:32] Speaker B: Are you single, Doug?
[01:05:34] Speaker A: I've been a single dad since 1982.
[01:05:37] Speaker B: Yeah, I just wanted to make sure.
[01:05:39] Speaker A: When I found Cheryl on my doorstep in a basket.
[01:05:42] Speaker B: Yeah, I remember.
You want to come?
[01:05:45] Speaker A: I was married before that. Do I want to what?
[01:05:48] Speaker B: Come get laid tonight?
Or do.
[01:05:51] Speaker A: Are you coming on to club swingles? Club I've heard of.
[01:05:57] Speaker B: Yeah, it's happening tonight.
[01:05:58] Speaker A: Someone shoved a bunch of flyers for that into the forms Dropbox here. They let me take home anything I want to from there. It's great.
[01:06:09] Speaker B: Oh, yeah.
[01:06:10] Speaker A: I got a whole italian hero one time.
It was a party sub, too, so it just kept coming through the slot. It was crazy. I just posted up at the bottom there, got into a deep squat and opened up, unhinged my jaw.
What are you invited me to.
[01:06:31] Speaker B: That sounds like a great time. We're going to go dancing.
[01:06:34] Speaker A: Oh, I'll go dance. Sure. Yeah, let's go. I'll go to swingles. Not right now.
[01:06:38] Speaker B: Like right now.
[01:06:39] Speaker A: Not right now.
[01:06:39] Speaker B: I get.
[01:06:39] Speaker A: My shift is over right now.
[01:06:42] Speaker B: Right now.
[01:06:43] Speaker A: All right, fine. Excuse me, everyone. We're going to have this man cut to the front of the line. He lost his license. He needs to re register.
This is an emergency, so everyone just calm down.
[01:06:54] Speaker B: Hey, fuck you guys.
[01:06:56] Speaker A: That's not going to help your case.
[01:06:58] Speaker B: Hey, excuse me, ma'am?
[01:07:01] Speaker A: Hello? Ma'am? Yes, hello.
[01:07:03] Speaker B: Hi. I need a new license. My name is Mike H. What does.
[01:07:07] Speaker A: H stand for, sweetheart?
[01:07:09] Speaker B: Hell, I recently went to the squirrel nut zippers song. What?
[01:07:16] Speaker A: The squirrel nut Zippers song. Hell, is that what you're named after?
[01:07:20] Speaker B: Yeah, that's it.
I've actually physically been to the world of the dan to Gethsemane, but yeah, that one. Yeah, that's okay.
[01:07:32] Speaker A: Okay, I guess Mike. Hell, yeah, that's me. No middle name? Nmn.
[01:07:39] Speaker B: Nope.
[01:07:40] Speaker A: All right. NMn.
All right, so you'll just stand there in front of the camera, and it will go off when you least expect it.
[01:07:52] Speaker B: Wait, but how will I know when it's least. Oh.
[01:07:55] Speaker A: All right, I think everything's ready. I think we've certainly got the olives.
Alex, how are the band?
[01:08:02] Speaker B: It's me. It's Mike. I'm back.
[01:08:04] Speaker A: Mike?
[01:08:05] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:08:06] Speaker C: Oh, hey, Mike. What's up? We're here. Just the band's doing good.
[01:08:11] Speaker A: Mike, are you okay?
Yeah, I know, and that's why I'm asking, just for.
You're not. You don't have, like, Frankenstein problems?
[01:08:22] Speaker B: No, I mean, I get some water in my ear, which kind of sucks, but that's okay.
[01:08:25] Speaker A: Okay.
[01:08:26] Speaker B: I'll survive that.
[01:08:26] Speaker C: Adam, he says he's fine. It's been a week. The world's reset. He's okay.
[01:08:30] Speaker A: All right, come on, Ramos. Let's get this guy Ramis to be our bouncer. Is Mike G on the.
[01:08:37] Speaker C: Hmm? Yeah, he is. Can I see your identification?
[01:08:41] Speaker B: Yeah, here you go.
[01:08:43] Speaker C: This says Mike h. Oh, yeah.
[01:08:45] Speaker B: Guys, I got a new one.
[01:08:48] Speaker C: Do you guys know a Mike h?
[01:08:50] Speaker A: Based on. Well, based on previous patterns, we can deduce that this is the same person.
Mike, how'd you get a new one? What happened?
[01:09:00] Speaker B: I went to hell.
[01:09:00] Speaker A: No more Mike. Jamaica?
[01:09:01] Speaker B: No, I went to hell.
[01:09:04] Speaker A: Wow. You went to hell?
[01:09:05] Speaker B: I went to hell.
[01:09:07] Speaker A: Oh, lucky. The most religious one among us.
Big fan of Catholicism, Mike?
[01:09:14] Speaker B: Yeah. Was kind of my thing.
[01:09:16] Speaker A: Yeah, it was your whole thing?
[01:09:18] Speaker B: Yeah, it was pretty big.
[01:09:19] Speaker A: Wow.
[01:09:20] Speaker B: Well, it kind of sucked. It was pretty hot.
[01:09:23] Speaker A: Were you tortured?
[01:09:25] Speaker B: No, it was just kind of generally uncomfortable. I had to watch reruns of king of queens.
[01:09:30] Speaker A: Oh, I'm so sorry.
[01:09:32] Speaker C: Yeah, that is hell.
[01:09:33] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:09:34] Speaker A: So sorry. All right, well, at least you're back now, did it hurt to be brought back to life?
[01:09:40] Speaker B: I don't know. I woke up and some guy named Seamus was trying to eat me with a bunch of crabs.
[01:09:44] Speaker A: I hope he goes to Planned Parenthood and gets that sorted out.
[01:09:50] Speaker B: The crabs, I meant, like, actually. Okay. Yeah.
[01:09:55] Speaker A: Are you saying you have crabs?
[01:09:57] Speaker B: No.
[01:09:58] Speaker A: Did you get crabs in hell?
[01:10:04] Speaker C: Anyway, guys, since we're all here, we can talk about Mike's hellcrabs later.
Why don't we get a couple of good ass minutes into this episode talking about the real shit before this party starts and we won't be able to hear each other?
[01:10:22] Speaker A: Yeah. Ramis, how's the line out there?
[01:10:25] Speaker C: Oh, there's more than I can count.
[01:10:28] Speaker A: Okay, let's make sure that we hit everything we want to hit in the episode, because it's going to get crazy in here. Mike, are you ready to swing?
[01:10:37] Speaker B: I am absolutely ready to swing. Okay. I also wanted to just throw out there. I thought it was very sweet. I thought it was really quite sweet that Robert and Deborah got along. The beginning of this episode started out well. I didn't like the cold open, but I really did think that the beginning premise of this episode started out, like, really wholesome of, like, you know, Robert and Debra, they're getting along. They're having a good time. It felt really cool. I liked it. And then it just very quickly developed. I know that this has been said before, but I think this was the quickest. I have been personally pissed off at Raymond in a single episode.
[01:11:19] Speaker A: I think I agree with.
[01:11:22] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:11:22] Speaker A: Yeah. Maybe I'd have to look at what minute he said that to Robert, that Deborah didn't actually like dancing with him. But whatever that is, that's where I also didn't like Senor Navel, to be fair.
[01:11:38] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:11:38] Speaker C: For me, it was like, frame one, where they were sitting and Deborah was looking sad watching the TV, and Raymond was looking like he wanted to fucking die. That's when I hated the thing.
[01:11:50] Speaker B: I didn't mind that he didn't like the movie. I hate people that talk during movies, period. Unless we've seen the movie before, then.
[01:11:57] Speaker C: All bets, especially when the other person is so clearly engaged in it.
It's one thing to watch a crappy movie with your boys and just roast it the whole time.
[01:12:10] Speaker B: Absolutely. That's a great time.
[01:12:11] Speaker C: That's not what's happening here.
[01:12:12] Speaker B: No.
[01:12:12] Speaker C: Sorry, I interrupted you.
[01:12:14] Speaker B: Senor Navel is roasting it. And I hated Senor navel. I hated him with such a passion. Was not funny. It was juvenile, which I'm typically into juvenile humor. That sucked. That was just not funny. Sorry.
[01:12:28] Speaker A: Yeah, I agree. It was not funny.
[01:12:31] Speaker B: It was annoying.
[01:12:32] Speaker A: I don't think Ray Romano should be playing senors, frankly. I think.
[01:12:40] Speaker B: That was the biggest voice.
[01:12:43] Speaker C: Actor for Senor Maple.
[01:12:45] Speaker B: They needed to get a hispanic actor to play senor nap. Otherwise they should have. Pretty gross.
[01:12:51] Speaker A: That would have been the right thing to do. Yeah, that would have been.
[01:12:56] Speaker B: People were racist in the guess.
[01:13:00] Speaker A: Yeah, people were racist in the 90s. Indeed. Good thing that's over.
[01:13:04] Speaker B: Y two k. Wipe that all out of.
[01:13:06] Speaker A: That's what y two k was. Y two kkk.
Y two kkk. Robert. I'm going to jump around. Robert dancing with his CPR doll, Ray. Speaking of bad qualities of Ray's. We got racism, we got homophobia.
Robert having a great time dancing with his doll. Ray has to be like, is that a man? Like, really, Ray?
[01:13:31] Speaker B: Gender indeterminate.
[01:13:32] Speaker A: They are gender indeterminate.
[01:13:34] Speaker B: I thought that was pretty funny.
[01:13:35] Speaker A: That was funny. I liked his intensity when he said that.
Jumping around Ray and Deborah. This is a scene that I want to talk about.
Ray and Debra. Deborah is all dressed up, ready to go out with Robert. Ray asks her again. The hits keep coming. We got racism, homophobia, misogyny. He asks. We hit the trifecta. If she's going to a stripper's funeral, that's rude. And also, she was fine.
[01:14:13] Speaker B: That would never be okay to say, blah, blah, blah. But also, that was just a normal dress. It wasn't particularly revealing or anything like that. It was fine.
[01:14:23] Speaker C: Ray's feeling very insecure that his wife would rather hang out with Robert than him, which is true, because sucks.
Like, if I was married to Ray, I wouldn't want to hang out with him either. If his brother was the one who's like, hey, you want to go do something? I'd be like, yeah, let's go dance.
[01:14:44] Speaker A: Up the monotony of my.
[01:14:46] Speaker C: Like, it's better than sitting here enjoying a movie that's getting roasted by my husband's navel.
[01:14:54] Speaker A: He's a square.
He doesn't like the swing talk. Jumping, jiving, cat's pajamas. Let her have a little bit of fun.
What a dick.
Robert calls to cancel, and his excuse is a kid got stuck in a well.
[01:15:12] Speaker B: Okay, I want to talk about this. This is fucking hilarious. Just the idea that Rob's like, I need to make up an excuse. It's not so serious, but I got to get out of it.
[01:15:23] Speaker A: Yeah, we know that Robert has seen people gunned down in the streets.
[01:15:29] Speaker C: This is his excuse.
[01:15:32] Speaker A: There's.
[01:15:32] Speaker B: Well, I like the tall guy. Such a great line.
[01:15:37] Speaker C: They needed someone tall.
[01:15:39] Speaker A: I like the sort of vaudevillian. Are there wells in Queens? That's the thing. People don't know they're there, and they fall in them.
Yes.
[01:15:50] Speaker B: I bet the parents have a lock on the safety deposit box, but not the hole in their backyard.
[01:15:56] Speaker A: On their sock drawer. Yeah, on the sock drawer. Sock drawer, yes. There are wells in Queens. Located in southeastern Queens. The groundwater supply system consists of 67 supply wells at 43 well stations and several water storage tanks. The groundwater system did provide water to a limited portion of the city's distribution system in Queens until 2007, but has not operated since then. At this point in time that this was being filmed and released. There were wells.
[01:16:22] Speaker C: There were wells.
[01:16:24] Speaker A: However, they are not the kind that a kid would fall down.
They're the kind that are more industrial.
[01:16:34] Speaker C: Maybe Robert knew the first half of that fact and not.
[01:16:36] Speaker A: He was like, I've got plausible deniability.
Yes. Robert's got a date with.
You know, she's sad that Robert canceled. Ray tries to pitch. If you had to pick one of these, you've got to spend an evening with Ray, and you have to pick one of these. Back rub, sex. Back rub. No sex or Nintendo.
[01:17:03] Speaker C: Can I do the trifecta?
[01:17:06] Speaker A: You back rub sex break for Nintendo, and then finish off with a back rub or with no sex. Yeah, okay, Mike.
[01:17:16] Speaker B: I'll have sex.
[01:17:21] Speaker A: Did you have sex in hell?
[01:17:25] Speaker B: No. Weirdly, still banned down there.
[01:17:29] Speaker A: Really? What happens? You go to super hell or what?
[01:17:35] Speaker B: I wasn't down there.
[01:17:36] Speaker C: Did they send you back to earth and say, try again?
[01:17:40] Speaker B: Yeah, they have one health reverge and said, one hell. That looked a lot more fun for everybody else.
[01:17:47] Speaker A: What else do I have? I don't know if I have anything else about that scene. I mean, we got to talk about Marie.
We got to talk about Marie's action performance in this episode. By the way, this is one of the other episodes that Peter Boyle isn't in because of his heart attack.
[01:18:05] Speaker B: I kind of figured that that was going to be the case.
[01:18:07] Speaker A: So Marie comes over. She needs to borrow vanilla. And then things get anything but vanilla as she sits down to watch the action movie with Ray and Gianni, which the best guess that Alex and I could come up with was starship troopers, because there's giant bugs, they explode, and there's fire, and it's the. Don't know, Mike, if you have a different sense, I think it was just.
[01:18:34] Speaker B: Generic Sci-Fi horror movie. It's probably not a real thing.
[01:18:39] Speaker A: It's probably something in the zeitgeist, though.
[01:18:41] Speaker B: You think so?
[01:18:42] Speaker A: Yeah. Ideas don't come out of thin air, Mike. Everything has to be tuned into the frequencies of the universe.
[01:18:50] Speaker B: I can make something up.
[01:18:52] Speaker A: Right now, I would like to see you come up with one full legal american name.
[01:18:57] Speaker B: One full legal american name. You got it. Joseph Robinette Biden. There you go. Got it.
[01:19:07] Speaker A: There is no name more american.
[01:19:10] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:19:11] Speaker A: No. Marie sits down. She likes the action movie. No, no. Bullets won't stop him. Flame his head. And then she has Debra get the vanilla for her when Deborah comes home. Because they're about to waste these mutants. And then she asks Ray to get her a beer. Ray comes back with a beer and a glass. She takes the beer and down the hatch. I mean, doesn't even use the glass. Doesn't even use the glass. I don't know. It was a great Marie performance. She was in this episode for, like, three minutes. And crushed one of the most memorable parts.
Okay, let's add a fourth thing. You got to spend the night with Ray. You've got to do those three activities at the end, though, you get to go downstairs and watch a movie with Marie. What are you putting on?
[01:20:04] Speaker C: I'm going to put on edge of tomorrow. I feel like she'd like that one, Mike.
[01:20:09] Speaker B: Scream seven.
[01:20:10] Speaker A: Scream seven hasn't come out yet. Wow.
[01:20:14] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:20:15] Speaker A: Wow.
[01:20:16] Speaker C: You know what?
[01:20:16] Speaker B: In the future, I'll change it. I'll change it. I'll do scream four.
[01:20:20] Speaker A: Okay.
[01:20:20] Speaker B: Because that way when she's scared, she'll jump in and we can cuddle.
[01:20:24] Speaker A: I would go die hard. I think that's the classic correct answer. I think just given the sex, probably because then we'd also play whatever Nintendo game on hard as well just be a running theme. I'm working with a new lawyer, so I've got, like, hard on the brain. Hard on. There it is.
[01:20:46] Speaker C: That Arnold, South Carolina.
[01:20:47] Speaker A: Yeah, Arnold, South Carolina.
[01:20:49] Speaker C: Yeah, I've seen his billboards.
[01:20:51] Speaker A: Yeah, they're good. They're good. The new one, the full frontal one. And then you drive past and you look in your rearview mirror and it's full. Whatever. The opposite of frontal reversal.
Full rear. It's full rear.
[01:21:04] Speaker B: There you go.
[01:21:04] Speaker A: Good. I don't know how he got the chick fil a cows up there, too, painting his ass. What?
[01:21:09] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. The cows holding the sign that says, eat more, carolina, eat more.
[01:21:18] Speaker A: I mean, unless you care about, like, the guest stars. Sorry.
No, tell us about the blonde lady's name was Jill Zimmerman. And her character's name was Kristen, the band leader, who you see in the background of a couple shots. I don't know if this is the guy with the ponytail or the guy at the drums. Red Young. The band is called Red and the Red Hots, which is a fine, like a legit, cool swing band name. Yeah. There are 1234-5678 910 1112 swing dancers credited and uncredited on IMDb.
The most interesting person, none of them.
[01:22:04] Speaker B: No. Er alum.
No.
[01:22:08] Speaker A: Er alum, believe it or not, no. And did I look. Yes. The closest one, Ava Ladair, also known as Karen Dyer, has 91 credits and has been on a lot of TV shows. So she was working in ER time. She's certainly done procedurals and medical ones at that, I think. So she's our closest one, but no actual er appearance from anyone.
[01:22:39] Speaker B: Wow. Shocking.
[01:22:40] Speaker A: Shocking. Chris Judd is one of JLo's backup dancers. And most of these people are also choreographers.
[01:22:49] Speaker B: Okay.
[01:22:50] Speaker A: Yeah. Interesting.
[01:22:51] Speaker B: Got some work.
[01:22:52] Speaker A: All right.
Do you guys have anything else, or should we open this place up?
[01:22:57] Speaker B: All right, let him in.
[01:22:58] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
Mike. Alex.
[01:23:05] Speaker B: I'm swinging around all over.
[01:23:06] Speaker A: Mike, there's olives everywhere. Where's Alex?
[01:23:11] Speaker B: Olives. Everybody get your olives.
[01:23:15] Speaker C: Guys, I found the swing.
[01:23:18] Speaker A: Alex. That's not a swing. That's a downed electrical wire.
[01:23:22] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:23:25] Speaker A: Oh, my God. This is.
[01:23:27] Speaker B: Get out of the way. Me and my toaster.
[01:23:30] Speaker A: Hey, it's that guy. Holy shit.
[01:23:32] Speaker C: That guy's got toaster. He's riding around doing Swan dive.
[01:23:37] Speaker B: Seamus. Seamus, is your wife here?
[01:23:39] Speaker C: No, I don't bring my wife to.
[01:23:40] Speaker B: These kinds of things.
[01:23:41] Speaker C: Why would I bring my wife to these kind of things?
[01:23:44] Speaker B: I was a little excited to meet your wife.
[01:23:46] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, that's right. I forgot my wife. Whoops.
[01:23:48] Speaker A: Mike, I asked you to give me and lindsay a table at the front. You gave us a stool at the back. How was I supposed to inconspicuously run my hand under the tablecloth and let her know my intentions?
[01:24:07] Speaker B: You could just dance with her and then tell her that way.
[01:24:11] Speaker A: Mike, you don't understand how delicate a situation this is.
Will you talk to her for me, Lindsay?
[01:24:19] Speaker B: Yes. You see Captain Tommy over here? I see Captain Tommy over there. He wants to bang.
[01:24:26] Speaker A: I have to admit, the reason I invited you out here was.
I want a bang.
Oh, okay.
[01:24:40] Speaker C: But I kind of promised myself to Seamus.
[01:24:43] Speaker A: You promised? Seamus.
Seamus, get over here.
What are you doing? You know, I've loved for her for weeks now.
[01:24:56] Speaker C: Well, you know what I'm doing? Just going in, going out back and forth, here and there.
[01:25:02] Speaker A: In, out. Back and forth. That's why you have so many crabs, Seamus. You know he has crabs, Lindsay.
[01:25:09] Speaker C: This one's named Larry.
[01:25:11] Speaker A: God damn it.
[01:25:13] Speaker C: Adam. Adam.
[01:25:14] Speaker A: Yes.
[01:25:14] Speaker C: The goatly family.
[01:25:15] Speaker A: Oh, hey.
[01:25:16] Speaker C: I'm so glad he's having a great time. And I am upset about that. Why is there diehard playing?
[01:25:22] Speaker A: Well, just for fun. For, like, atmosphere.
[01:25:25] Speaker C: I wanted rom.com.
[01:25:27] Speaker A: I know, but we can't put it on the big screen. Do you want to watch it on my phone?
[01:25:33] Speaker B: Gary. Gary. He's gonna kill Hans Gruber. Get over here.
[01:25:39] Speaker A: Papa, we're rooting.
[01:25:41] Speaker C: Why can't they just get along?
No, do not.
[01:25:45] Speaker A: I wish Hans Gruber was my real dad.
[01:25:47] Speaker B: Oh, I wish I was married to him, too.
[01:25:50] Speaker C: That really makes me sad, actually.
Do you have the bathroom key? I'm going to go cry.
[01:25:57] Speaker A: Okay. Here you go. It's attached to a tire, so just be careful.
[01:26:01] Speaker B: Great.
[01:26:01] Speaker A: Make sure you bring it back. Okay.
[01:26:03] Speaker C: I'll just roll this.
[01:26:05] Speaker A: Mike, he's here.
Brian Backhand is here.
[01:26:09] Speaker B: Oh, dude, that guy fucks. Let's go.
[01:26:11] Speaker A: No, I know he fucks.
[01:26:15] Speaker B: He's doing the finger guns.
[01:26:17] Speaker A: You see his martini? You see his martini? I want you to put this anthrax in it. Don't tell anyone. I got.
[01:26:26] Speaker B: Christ. I'm not going to do that, man.
[01:26:28] Speaker A: Do it. Do it, God damn it.
[01:26:30] Speaker C: This is all I have, guys. Yo, is that anthrax? Gimme.
[01:26:36] Speaker A: Fuck.
[01:26:36] Speaker C: Wash it down with some booze. I'm Brian Backhand. I'm crazy.
[01:26:42] Speaker A: He made that YouTube video about how he's been micro dosing anthrax, and he got. Hey, wait a minute.
[01:26:48] Speaker C: You there? Didn't I fuck your wife?
[01:26:50] Speaker A: Yes.
[01:26:51] Speaker C: That's awesome. Is she here?
[01:26:53] Speaker A: You tell me.
[01:26:55] Speaker C: I guess not.
[01:26:56] Speaker A: What happened?
[01:26:57] Speaker C: I'm going to go find her. I still have her saved in my phone.
[01:27:00] Speaker A: Wait. Have you divorced my wife? My ex wife?
Or were you never married or whatever?
[01:27:09] Speaker C: No.
Did you think we were going to get married? Brian Backhand doesn't settle.
[01:27:16] Speaker A: She cucked me to fuck you once.
[01:27:20] Speaker C: Well, twice.
[01:27:22] Speaker A: Oh, God.
Oh, God.
[01:27:27] Speaker C: If it makes you feel better, it was awesome.
[01:27:30] Speaker A: I believe it.
[01:27:31] Speaker B: You know, Mr. Navel, I'm sorry. I really feel bad for you. But I also am going to be real with you. I kind of want to fuck Brian backhand now.
[01:27:43] Speaker C: I guess for tonight, I can be Brian forehand.
[01:27:46] Speaker B: Brian, you swing that way.
[01:27:48] Speaker A: Don't say swing.
[01:27:49] Speaker C: Did somebody call mine Ramis?
[01:27:52] Speaker A: No. Put it away.
[01:27:54] Speaker C: Okay. Goodbye.
[01:27:55] Speaker A: Oh, my God. It worked.
[01:27:57] Speaker B: There he goes.
[01:27:57] Speaker C: He can fly.
[01:27:58] Speaker A: He's been trying to do that.
Wow.
Great.
[01:28:03] Speaker C: Kids.
[01:28:04] Speaker B: Don't look.
[01:28:05] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[01:28:08] Speaker B: He's coming from the ceiling.
[01:28:10] Speaker A: Oh, Mike, are we late or something? I brought Cheryl.
[01:28:16] Speaker B: Cheryl.
[01:28:17] Speaker A: Hi. She's single and I showed her your LinkedIn profile, and she would be willing to dance with you tonight.
[01:28:26] Speaker B: Hey, Cheryl.
[01:28:28] Speaker A: Hey.
[01:28:29] Speaker B: You want to dance? Yeah. You know, the macarena?
[01:28:33] Speaker A: No.
[01:28:34] Speaker B: Let me teach you anyway. There. We know.
[01:28:39] Speaker A: I'm glad that my plan worked. I did. Just remember that until very recently, you were her godfather.
Let's go, Daddy.
It slipped my mind.
[01:28:54] Speaker B: Sorry. But she is 42.
[01:28:59] Speaker C: She can make her own decisions.
[01:29:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:29:02] Speaker C: They're not blood relatives. They're not?
[01:29:04] Speaker A: Who are you? Oh, you're the mayor.
Let me shake your hand.
[01:29:10] Speaker C: Okay.
[01:29:10] Speaker A: Alex care. I had a pre existing condition. I didn't pay a dime when I got my toenails surgically removed. Although it was in a back alley. I don't know. If I give you, like, an address, can you check to make sure that that's a real doctor?
[01:29:26] Speaker C: Don't worry, I know that doctor.
Robbie, North Carolina. He's a good dude. Personal friend of mine.
[01:29:34] Speaker A: Did somebody say my brother's name?
[01:29:36] Speaker B: Is that the lawyer?
[01:29:39] Speaker A: Downtown. Downtown.
[01:29:40] Speaker C: Downtown, South Carolina. And he sings his own intro.
[01:29:44] Speaker A: Don't call it out. Downtown dump down Arnold, South Carolina.
[01:29:52] Speaker B: Gary.
[01:29:53] Speaker A: Oh, no.
[01:29:53] Speaker B: There's a lawyer. We have to move Gary. We have to move on him.
[01:29:58] Speaker C: Lawyer? Where?
[01:30:00] Speaker A: I'm a lawyer.
[01:30:02] Speaker C: Oh, this man seems too cool. All right, do we kill him?
[01:30:06] Speaker A: Oh, fuck.
[01:30:07] Speaker C: The coolest guy here.
Now, who's going to sue them?
[01:30:13] Speaker A: Cocks the shotgun that she brought and fires it. But at that moment, Ramis's helicopter fails and he falls into the path of the bullet and saves Arnold, South Carolina's life.
Oh, my God.
Well, I'd be lying if I said that hasn't happened to me before, but.
All right, everyone, this has been great. I'm going to go. Got to get back on my hog.
[01:30:47] Speaker B: All right, party's over.
[01:30:50] Speaker C: I'm going to go home.
Yeah, I go. I'm going to go jump in the river.
[01:30:57] Speaker A: If all of you guys are still looking to party, why don't you hop on the back of my hog? We'll go down to the vacant lot and, I don't know, throw some firecrackers around.
[01:31:08] Speaker B: Yeah.
[01:31:08] Speaker A: Okay.
[01:31:08] Speaker C: Let's go to Walmart.
[01:31:10] Speaker B: And do know. I know I just tried to kill him, but I would love to hop on the hog.
[01:31:16] Speaker A: Gertrude, you have changed your tune a little bit.
Have you seen my billboard shotgun blast?
[01:31:23] Speaker B: I have. That seems like an action here.
[01:31:25] Speaker A: Gertrude. Gertrude. You ever seen a whole salami?
[01:31:29] Speaker B: Oh, baby.
[01:31:31] Speaker C: Oh, no. Is it my turn to get cucked?
[01:31:36] Speaker A: Oh, Gary, I'm so sorry. I wish I hadn't invited you here. Well, it happens to everyone. Pretty much. I mean, Limbrook.
[01:31:44] Speaker C: Does it?
[01:31:45] Speaker A: Limbrook, I think, has most cucks per capita.
[01:31:49] Speaker C: Yeah, it has, like, a 32% cuck rate.
[01:31:51] Speaker A: 32% cuck rate.
[01:31:52] Speaker C: Highest in the nation.
[01:31:53] Speaker A: Highest?
[01:31:54] Speaker C: Well, second highest. We're coming for you, Jacksonville.
[01:31:59] Speaker A: All right, I guess. I mean, most people have left. We'll say that. Most people went with Arnold. Let's regroup.
[01:32:08] Speaker B: Yeah, I think it's time for us to just do the barone.
[01:32:11] Speaker A: You mean the barometer?
[01:32:12] Speaker B: The barometer. Barometer. Barone Zonus. You should sign up for it. But no, we're doing the barometer right now.
[01:32:18] Speaker A: Yeah.
Reggie, is it cool if we do the barometer in here or are you.
[01:32:25] Speaker B: Only if you take olives.
[01:32:27] Speaker A: All right.
[01:32:28] Speaker B: They're tax free.
[01:32:30] Speaker A: Yeah, we know they're tax free. Yeah, you're on the hook, by the way. Well, how much did you make? How much did you net here?
[01:32:38] Speaker B: I don't need to declare until April 15.
[01:32:40] Speaker A: Until the 15th.
[01:32:42] Speaker B: Until the 15th. Tax day.
[01:32:43] Speaker A: Yes, every 15th is tax day.
[01:32:47] Speaker C: Clock's ticking.
[01:32:48] Speaker A: All right, we'll be waiting.
[01:32:50] Speaker B: You see, as he walks off, he's calling to get a plane to Bermuda. Hello? Get me to Bermuda.
[01:32:55] Speaker C: Don't worry, we'll get our money back.
[01:32:57] Speaker A: We always do. All right, guys, let's move this body. Is he was unregistered, right? Or was that his brother?
He's not a human.
[01:33:10] Speaker B: His brother was barely human.
[01:33:12] Speaker C: Seamus isn't the human. Ramis? We actually don't know Ramis.
[01:33:16] Speaker A: I don't think he got shot, but he's sort of, like, flickering out of existence. Is he.
[01:33:22] Speaker B: Oh, my God, he's a fairy.
[01:33:24] Speaker A: Is he like some sort of supernatural being? Like a fairy? Or is he like a projection of shame? Well, he's gone now.
[01:33:32] Speaker B: Yeah, we'll never find out.
[01:33:34] Speaker A: Wow.
[01:33:34] Speaker B: We'll never know.
[01:33:34] Speaker A: Okay, but I think this place is cursed now. So I think after we do this, we'll leave and burn it down.
[01:33:42] Speaker C: Never come back.
[01:33:44] Speaker A: Make sure no one ever builds on this lot again. Okay, so, look, let's turn our attention to the classic barometer. It's our scale from one to ten on which you rate race performance as a husband, son, brother, father, dancer, with ten being the great dads of sitcom history. Your Danny Tanner's uncle Phil's mike. Now that you're back from hell, give us another.
[01:34:07] Speaker B: Ooh, that's a good question.
I'm going to go with Santa Claus.
[01:34:16] Speaker A: Do you mean the Tim Allen Santa Claus?
[01:34:19] Speaker B: Yeah, like Scott Calvin.
[01:34:20] Speaker A: Okay, pulled it. Pulled Scott Calvin. No hesitation.
With one being the bad men of television history, men who actively harm their families, your Don drapers and Walter Whites.
[01:34:33] Speaker C: Alex, how about bad Santa?
[01:34:37] Speaker A: Bad Santa? Yes. I don't know if he's a dad, but he's certainly bad.
[01:34:41] Speaker C: He is certainly bad.
[01:34:43] Speaker A: He is certainly a cherry Poppin daddy.
For me. I'll just say it. Ray sucked this episode. Sociopath learned nothing. Basically tried to save all of the damage that he's done by saying that his penis can talk. I'll give him a little bit for that because Arnold, Carolina. Arnold, South Carolina showed me. I know it works. So if Ray has that gift, he's blessed. I'm going to give him a two. I think. I think it's that bad. I think the mind games with Robert and Deborah is just fucked. Alex.
[01:35:27] Speaker C: Yeah, Adam, I'm kind of with you there. I think what Ray did was really shitty from basically start to end. Dude basically was entirely just selfish and there's no real even reason for it. Dude saw two of his family members having a good time and it was not about him or he was not involved. And he was like, absolutely not.
This dude really is so used to the entire world revolving around him that to the point it does not revolve around him, makes him legitimately uncomfortable. I think two is a very appropriate score because one is the only way it would get worse is if, yeah, he was actively doing permanent damage to his family.
So, yeah, two.
[01:36:19] Speaker A: Yeah, if he cucked Deborah, that's a one.
[01:36:25] Speaker C: That is a one.
[01:36:26] Speaker B: That's a one. I think that's fair to say.
[01:36:29] Speaker A: Mike, is this a one for you?
[01:36:32] Speaker B: No, because there is one particular episode that I have in mind that I know Ray is going to score a one on. He doesn't cuck Deborah, but he does do something pretty damn bad. So I can't give him a one.
As you guys pointed out, there's almost nothing that we can point to that he did good here.
A very wholesome family moment that Robert and know found time to get along, and Ray just ruined it, just straight up. And also, it was like, oh, maybe he wants to be dancing with Deborah. It's kind of bad. But, hey, that could be kind of sweet in some light, if that's what's his goal. And then she was like, all right, let's go dancing. And he's like, what? No, I just wanted you to do.
There's.
[01:37:23] Speaker A: There's.
[01:37:23] Speaker B: There's nothing there.
[01:37:25] Speaker A: Nothing redeeming.
[01:37:26] Speaker B: I want to be different from you guys, so I'm not going to give him a two.
[01:37:29] Speaker A: I'm going to give him a 2.32.3. So what's the average of two two and 2.32.12. .1 that sounds right to me.
If not, is that the lowest?
That can't be the lowest. Can that be the lowest?
[01:37:54] Speaker B: It's got to be pretty close to the lowest.
[01:37:56] Speaker A: Let me see what the. I only have season two, like, immediately available. Up to season two immediately available. Ray's lowest score to date, at least to the end of season two.
No, he had a 1.8 in season two, episode 16. Do you remember what that was?
[01:38:16] Speaker B: No.
[01:38:17] Speaker A: It was called the checkbook.
[01:38:21] Speaker C: Yeah, that's really.
[01:38:23] Speaker B: Yeah, he almost called cluster.
[01:38:25] Speaker A: That is like family. Long term damage to him.
[01:38:27] Speaker C: Yeah, that actually might be worse than this one because that's not just like him being an awful person, it's him financially destroying his family.
[01:38:38] Speaker A: I give him a one for that. Alex gave him a two. Mike. Gave him a 2.5. Mike. You think Ray did better in the check book than this episode?
Not to sway you.
[01:38:48] Speaker B: Money hard.
[01:38:49] Speaker A: Yes, money hard.
[01:38:50] Speaker B: Yeah, money is hard.
[01:38:53] Speaker A: All right, then 2.1 seems about right. Okay, so let me just.
Can you still, Mike, touch holy water?
[01:39:05] Speaker B: Let's find out.
[01:39:08] Speaker A: I think instead of whatever martinis are, Reggie was serving holy water with.
[01:39:14] Speaker B: Holy water.
[01:39:15] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:39:16] Speaker B: All right, so I'm going to put my whole hand in. Oh, yeah, that burns. That is painful.
[01:39:22] Speaker A: Yeah, that burns all the skin off. You got a bone hand.
[01:39:24] Speaker B: Oh, yeah.
[01:39:25] Speaker A: Hopefully that bone hand grows back.
[01:39:27] Speaker C: Yeah, you're like a starfish. It should grow.
[01:39:30] Speaker A: It should grow back. All right, well, let me just dump that here. And we will never return to this spot.
I think the listener will want to return to everybody loves everybody loves Raymond next week when we cover season three, episode 25, whatever that may be called. But until then, you can follow us on Facebook and Instagram and threads at baroneszone for most of those, and then barone zone for a couple of them.
And you can visit us at Slash Raymond, email us at
[email protected] and you can check out the Barone Zonus monthly bonus episodes, lifetime access, pay what you want at donate this month is the big one. This is the season one ranking that we've been hyping for a while, so be sure to sign up. Check that out. Minimum donation, $0.50. So we've got fifty k to get back. So that's a good drop in the bucket. That's a good size drop.
[01:40:33] Speaker C: 100,000 subscribers at the minimum pay rate.
[01:40:36] Speaker A: No problem at all. Okay, so that's it for us. And I guess that means there's only one last thing to say, right?
[01:40:41] Speaker C: Our classic sign off. Here we go. Thanks so much for listening. And until next time, do not forget that everybody loves Raymond and we love.
