Episode Transcript
[00:00:21] Speaker A: Alright, it's me. Bet you're wondering how I got in the situation here.
[00:00:28] Speaker B: Who are you? Started back when.
[00:00:30] Speaker A: Well, we were doing our normal shindig. We were doing our normal podcast, but it turns out we've upset some people, some higher ups. You know what I'm saying?
[00:00:40] Speaker B: I don't know you.
[00:00:42] Speaker A: You look like the kind of guy that likes to stick it to the big man, am I right?
[00:00:46] Speaker B: What's a.
[00:00:50] Speaker A: Know? It's everybody loves everybody loves Raymond, the most famous and most popular and longest running everybody loves Raymond podcast that is currently on the can't be. You can't be running this game for as long as we have without attracting some unfortunate attention.
[00:01:09] Speaker B: I don't understand. I'm scared.
[00:01:11] Speaker A: So what happened is the people at Paramount, plus, they want in. They want in.
We were making too much money for them. We were using their likeness. We were using. Well, I don't think we're using their likeness. That's what they're alleging. They're suing the pants off of us. They want every dime that we've ever made. And I'm telling you what, I don't give a shit who they are. I don't care if they got Ray Romano on this. I don't care about any of that. All I care about is keeping those $5.
[00:01:39] Speaker C: Okay, honey, who is this?
[00:01:43] Speaker B: This is Joe Rogan, I think.
[00:01:45] Speaker C: Oh, big fan.
[00:01:47] Speaker B: He's talking about some sort of podcast.
[00:01:51] Speaker C: I'm suing my doctor because he wouldn't let me take Ivermectin. And my sweetie here is just here to support me.
[00:01:58] Speaker B: And I'm suing her because she wanted to take it.
[00:02:03] Speaker C: I made some unfavorable comparisons between him and the horse, and now it's tense.
[00:02:10] Speaker A: So you guys are actually suing the big man himself? You're suing Big Pharma? That's great. I am being sued by Paramount plus because of the name everybody loves everybody loves Raymond. They don't like that being in there at all.
They want me broke. They want me broke. How much are you suing them for the Ivermectin stuff?
[00:02:32] Speaker B: Well, a year's salary.
[00:02:34] Speaker C: Two nickels a year of my doctor's salary. My doctor works, I go to three nickels. I go to Doctors without Borders.
[00:02:49] Speaker A: I didn't realize that they worked in the US.
[00:02:53] Speaker C: It's right there in the name, sweetheart. No borders. They don't care where they are.
[00:02:59] Speaker B: Everywhere.
[00:03:00] Speaker A: Okay? Do they not pay doctors without borders? Well, they only make fifteen cents a year.
[00:03:06] Speaker C: That's what the subpoena said, I think.
[00:03:08] Speaker A: You might be being bamboozed. Do you guys have a lawyer?
[00:03:11] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, you're looking at him. My husband.
Lawyer.
[00:03:16] Speaker A: Is that your name?
[00:03:17] Speaker C: No, that's his occupation.
[00:03:20] Speaker A: Okay, I'm sorry.
[00:03:20] Speaker C: So we're suing my doctor without Borders for his year's salary, and then my husband is suing me for defamation for fifteen cents, and it'll just go around and around again. We also have a divorce appointment at 430 if there's time. We want to get to the jiffy lube before it closes. That's where I get my enemas.
[00:03:42] Speaker A: You sound like an awesome lawyer. Listen, I need a lawyer. You do the fence.
[00:03:46] Speaker B: I don't build fences anymore, Sonny.
[00:03:49] Speaker A: You're hired.
[00:03:50] Speaker B: Okay.
Looks like I'm going to be here a while. But seriously, what is a podcast?
[00:03:58] Speaker C: Mike, we're ready for you if you want to just come in here.
[00:04:02] Speaker A: You'll never take me alive.
[00:04:04] Speaker C: No, you got to come in. You agree?
[00:04:05] Speaker A: I know my right.
[00:04:06] Speaker C: You agreed to give a deposition.
[00:04:08] Speaker A: Is he asking us? I'll kill him.
[00:04:10] Speaker C: He's not.
[00:04:11] Speaker A: You can try.
[00:04:12] Speaker C: Hold on, Mike. Come in here.
[00:04:14] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:04:14] Speaker C: Thank you.
[00:04:15] Speaker A: I'm taking my lawyer with me. Come in. Your lawyer?
[00:04:18] Speaker B: Okay. My name's Sawyer.
[00:04:19] Speaker A: Sawyer. Sawyer the lawyer.
Never mind. That's stupid. You're fired.
[00:04:26] Speaker C: Come on in. Have a seat. Do you want a small Desani? We've got small desani and we've got giant Aquafina. Take your pick.
[00:04:34] Speaker A: I'll take the Desani.
[00:04:35] Speaker B: He does not deserve such treats.
[00:04:39] Speaker A: I deserve it. It's right in the constitution.
[00:04:42] Speaker B: Name the constitution. Where?
[00:04:45] Speaker A: The constitution.
[00:04:46] Speaker B: Oh, he's good. Give him the water.
[00:04:48] Speaker C: Here you go, Mike.
[00:04:50] Speaker A: I know my rights.
[00:04:51] Speaker C: So this is for the record. We're representing paramount in our lawsuit against you for intellectual property violation, for using the name and likeness of everybody loves Raymond for your podcast. Everybody loves everybody loves Raymond. We are seeking damages in the amount of $6 million.
[00:05:11] Speaker B: You are in a lot of trouble.
[00:05:13] Speaker C: An immediate cease and desist on production of your podcast. My name.
[00:05:18] Speaker A: That's real nice.
[00:05:20] Speaker C: My name is Lewis. This is Bill.
[00:05:22] Speaker A: Did I ask?
[00:05:24] Speaker C: Wow.
[00:05:25] Speaker A: Did I ask?
[00:05:26] Speaker C: Did I putting that in the record? Incredibly.
[00:05:31] Speaker A: Don't put it in the record.
[00:05:32] Speaker C: You don't gotta put nothing in the going. It's going want.
[00:05:36] Speaker A: I got my rights.
[00:05:37] Speaker C: We have Margaret on Steno, so she's getting all of this down.
[00:05:41] Speaker A: Oh, hey, Margaret. How are you?
[00:05:44] Speaker C: She only communicates through Steno, so I'd appreciate you not speaking directly to her.
[00:05:52] Speaker A: Sorry.
[00:05:53] Speaker C: It'll only distract her from her steno.
[00:05:56] Speaker A: I understand.
[00:05:58] Speaker C: And for the record, that's stenography. I'm using the colloquial I got you. That's for the benefit of the record.
[00:06:05] Speaker A: Margaret, you like bridge?
This is great.
[00:06:10] Speaker C: She stenowed. Yes. So, I mean, maybe you guys can have a connection over that, but let's get to the matter at hand. Mike, you've wasted enough of scheduling. This, I'll say, for the record, was impossible. You made it very difficult.
[00:06:24] Speaker A: I made it pretty clear.
[00:06:25] Speaker C: You sent us a Google calendar appointment page that you gave us 15 minutes increments every 05:00 a.m. At 05:00 a.m. Every day.
[00:06:36] Speaker A: Right.
[00:06:36] Speaker B: And then when we called you at.
[00:06:37] Speaker C: That time, we selected and we showed up at the address.
[00:06:43] Speaker A: It's 05:00 a.m.
[00:06:44] Speaker C: Which turned out to be a panera bread dumpster.
[00:06:47] Speaker A: Got you.
[00:06:48] Speaker B: I will skin you.
[00:06:50] Speaker A: Is he allowed to say that?
[00:06:51] Speaker C: Bill? I'm going to take the first quote. Bill had a rough morning, okay. Some seagulls mistook him for a bread bowl. So it's been a bread bill, if you will.
[00:07:01] Speaker A: Oh, that explains the haircut.
[00:07:03] Speaker C: Yes, it does.
[00:07:04] Speaker A: But you know what? That's. I'm warming up to you, Lisa.
[00:07:07] Speaker C: My name is.
But, you know, I'd rather you call me Lisa than not call me at going to. I'm going to lead off with our first question.
[00:07:20] Speaker B: How do you want to die?
[00:07:26] Speaker A: Ideally, I would love to die surrounded by. I would love to die on Coney island. I've actually thought about this really a lot.
[00:07:33] Speaker C: So he's about to say surrounded by his loved ones. And then he pivoted to. On Coney island. Go on.
[00:07:39] Speaker A: On Coney island at the top of the ferris wheel, surrounded by corn dogs and churros and pretzels, and I'm eating them, and I open my arms and a flock of seagulls come and peck me to death along with everybody else. So you were halfway to my dream this morning, Bill. I kind of am jealous of you.
[00:07:56] Speaker B: Okay. You passed the test.
[00:08:00] Speaker C: Okay, that's out of the way. Margaret, you get all that down.
Great. So let's move on to the next question.
Why did you decide to start a podcast about everybody loves Raymond?
[00:08:13] Speaker A: It's actually kind of a long story. It kind of goes back a ways. It goes back like 910 years or so. It starts all the way back then. And was Limbrook. It was the year of year. Was, well, 2011.
[00:08:32] Speaker C: Let's, Margaret, just get down in the record that he doesn't know how to do math because 2011 is 13 years ago.
[00:08:43] Speaker B: She's fine. She does that all the time.
[00:08:44] Speaker C: Communicates through steno or stenography for the.
[00:08:53] Speaker A: Understand. I understand.
Well, it starts all the way back.
Driving. I was driving down Catalpa Avenue. I was in Limbrook at the time. It was great. I had a lot more hair than I do right now.
[00:09:05] Speaker C: And a wave transition into the past.
[00:09:10] Speaker B: Mike has the exact same amount of.
[00:09:12] Speaker C: Hair, and it is thinning.
[00:09:18] Speaker A: He also has a slight teenager's first mustache. Peach fuzz.
[00:09:24] Speaker C: My first mustache, which he does not have in the present sunrise over the Atlantic Ocean, Mike is driving his PT cruiser convertible with the top down through Limbrook. Down Catalpa. He is absolutely blaring. I'm yours by Jason Moraz.
[00:09:43] Speaker A: This is the greatest song ever written. We live in the golden age of music.
He's just flooring. He's just driving down. Passes through a stoplight, and then comes to a screeching halt.
Hey, buddy, what are you doing?
[00:09:58] Speaker B: That was scary.
[00:10:00] Speaker A: You're in my driving lane. How dare you.
[00:10:02] Speaker B: All right, well, first of all, I have the right away as a pedestrian.
[00:10:05] Speaker A: Where do you see that? Where is that written, that sign right over there.
[00:10:08] Speaker B: See, you have the right of way as a pedestrian.
[00:10:11] Speaker A: Shut the fuck up.
[00:10:12] Speaker B: And the lights red.
[00:10:13] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:10:14] Speaker B: Do you not know how to read color?
[00:10:16] Speaker A: Good sir, suggestion?
[00:10:19] Speaker B: I almost died, thank you very much. And you made me drop my six eggs.
[00:10:27] Speaker A: Listen, I'm sorry. He's gotten off on the wrong foot. This new music has just gotten me so pumped. I'm just on edge.
[00:10:35] Speaker B: Well, look, just on edge, man, I'm going to be late, so you got to help me now. We got to get six more eggs.
[00:10:45] Speaker A: Hold on.
They typically sell these in orders of twelve.
[00:10:50] Speaker B: There's no time to explain. We have to get six.
[00:10:54] Speaker A: Get in the cruiser. Thanks.
[00:10:56] Speaker B: I'm Alex.
[00:10:58] Speaker A: Oh, hey. I'm Mike. A. Nice to meet you.
[00:11:00] Speaker B: Likewise.
S. Well, it's sheer, but I wanted to say just one initial. Two.
[00:11:06] Speaker A: Oh, okay, great.
[00:11:08] Speaker B: We're not going to be friends. Let's go.
[00:11:11] Speaker A: The tires burn out as Mike slams on the gas of the PT cruiser. And we careen past the still red stoplight into Philip's plots as we start looking for a king Cullen. All right, I park. Go get it. Go get it.
[00:11:26] Speaker B: Come with me. Why? We need a distraction.
[00:11:29] Speaker A: Okay, let's go.
[00:11:32] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:11:33] Speaker C: All right, dear, it looks like the organics are about a dollar more expensive. Can we just go with the regular styrofoam?
[00:11:42] Speaker A: Now, Jenny Craig says that the organics are better. We should go with the organics.
[00:11:47] Speaker C: God, if I have to hear about Jenny Craig one more time, I'm going to scream.
[00:11:51] Speaker A: What's your problem with Jenny Craig?
[00:11:53] Speaker C: I'm an Oprah man. You know, I've been doing Weight watchers.
[00:11:57] Speaker A: Just because I banged her once does not mean that you have to go ahead and bring it.
[00:12:01] Speaker C: I wish you wouldn't call deviating from the diet plan banging Jenny Craig. At least in public.
[00:12:09] Speaker A: I banged her so hard, it was great. I ate four cupcakes that day, and she was so upset with.
And you're just jealous that you can't do that to.
Because in Weight watchers you can eat anything.
[00:12:25] Speaker B: Hey, Mike, you see those people with the upset man, the bisexual woman, the.
[00:12:32] Speaker A: Ones that are clearly arguing over organic milk?
[00:12:35] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:12:35] Speaker B: So that's going to be our perfect distraction. All right, you see these eggs? There are twelve. We only need six.
[00:12:41] Speaker A: Yeah, so we could buy the whole and then.
[00:12:43] Speaker B: All right, ready? Watch this.
[00:12:46] Speaker C: What the hell? What was that?
[00:12:48] Speaker A: What are you doing? He did. You don't do that.
[00:12:51] Speaker B: Here, take these five. I'm going to go buy these six.
[00:12:54] Speaker A: Do I have to? Mike just starts chucking the eggs.
You don't do that. Yeah.
[00:13:01] Speaker C: Where the fuck do you get off, man?
[00:13:04] Speaker A: I don't know. I thought I got these eggs and there were too many.
[00:13:08] Speaker C: Be honest. Did you egg my wife because she's bisexual?
[00:13:13] Speaker A: Yeah. Do you egg me because I'm bisexual? How was I supposed to know that she's bisexual?
[00:13:18] Speaker C: Flag pants.
[00:13:19] Speaker A: Yeah, I am wearing the pants.
[00:13:21] Speaker B: All right, what's going on?
Supermarket security. Hey, are you a bisexual?
[00:13:27] Speaker A: Yeah, actually. How'd you guess?
[00:13:29] Speaker B: Me, too. Look, I'm wearing the undershirt.
[00:13:32] Speaker A: Oh, hey, yeah, I remember that. When they did a sale on those. I got three at home.
[00:13:37] Speaker B: What are you doing to this guy?
[00:13:38] Speaker C: Am I about to get cucked?
[00:13:41] Speaker A: You ought to cuck my husband.
[00:13:45] Speaker B: Hang on. Let's see how this goes. What's happening with this guy?
[00:13:49] Speaker A: Hi.
I don't know. I was just getting eggs and there were too many and these guys got upset with me.
[00:13:55] Speaker C: He was throwing eggs at us.
[00:13:57] Speaker B: Oh, okay.
[00:13:58] Speaker C: He threw five eggs at us.
[00:14:00] Speaker A: I didn't throw five eggs. I threw one egg.
[00:14:02] Speaker C: Well, there's ten shells on the ground.
[00:14:05] Speaker A: Yeah, but I didn't do that. I just got through the one.
[00:14:08] Speaker B: Well, then who did?
[00:14:11] Speaker A: There was a guy that. I don't know where he went. Alex.
[00:14:16] Speaker B: Funny story. All right. You could punch this guy if you want. I'm going to go.
[00:14:20] Speaker A: What?
[00:14:21] Speaker C: Get him, honey.
[00:14:22] Speaker A: Right. Let's get this going.
[00:14:23] Speaker B: Alex, is in Mike's car, waiting for him with the eggs.
[00:14:26] Speaker A: Mike opens the door, sits down with a black eye.
[00:14:29] Speaker B: Come on, let's go.
[00:14:30] Speaker A: I can't really see right now, actually.
[00:14:33] Speaker B: Why?
[00:14:34] Speaker A: The swell welling.
[00:14:35] Speaker B: Oh, was that not there before?
[00:14:37] Speaker A: No, it's pretty new.
[00:14:40] Speaker B: Okay.
Do you want me to drive?
[00:14:43] Speaker A: I don't know you. How am I supposed to. I'm going to let you just drive my PT cruiser.
[00:14:48] Speaker B: Well, I mean, you're blind, so I don't know. What do you want?
[00:14:50] Speaker A: That's a good point. All right, let's switch.
[00:14:52] Speaker B: Great. Okay. Here, take the eggs.
[00:14:54] Speaker A: Where are we going with these eggs?
[00:14:58] Speaker B: Buckle up, my friend. Your whole world is about to get turned upside down.
All right, stop.
[00:15:07] Speaker C: Sorry.
So then you guys went and started the podcast, then, like, right after that?
[00:15:14] Speaker A: Well, no, there is a while later. It's not right yet.
[00:15:17] Speaker C: I don't really understand what this has to do with the podcast. Let me try a different line of questioning. We can revisit how the whole podcast got started, what recording equipment are you using, and how much have you spent on it?
These sorts of things will help us determine how much to ask for in damages.
[00:15:37] Speaker A: Yeah, right. Yeah. It's kind of like when Ray and Deborah met for the first time on episode 26 of season three of everybody loves Raymond. Do you guys remember that episode?
[00:15:49] Speaker B: It was on earlier.
[00:15:50] Speaker C: Someone had put it on in the waiting room.
[00:15:53] Speaker A: Or kind of like how Ray and Deborah met. Because Ray was moving a futon before he became a writer. Alex and I stole some eggs and threw them at an old, you know, meet cute from humble beginnings. It's great.
[00:16:08] Speaker B: I do see the similarities.
[00:16:09] Speaker C: Yes, I do.
[00:16:10] Speaker A: It's right there, right?
[00:16:12] Speaker C: I guess. So what did you. I mean, I kind of wanted to talk about that scene, honestly, of the futon delivery.
[00:16:22] Speaker A: Yeah, that was a great scene, right? Yeah, it's sort of been when Deborah got hit with the. She gets hit a lot in this episode.
[00:16:29] Speaker C: Ray knocks quite a few times. Slapstick episode, first with the futon and then with the freezer door. Ray and Gianni delivering that futon on behalf of Claude's futons. I don't think they've mentioned Ray's stint as a futon delivery man before, but interesting little detail for Ray.
[00:16:50] Speaker A: They have not. I do got to point out, when Deborah opens the door and Gianni's standing there, hand on his hip, is it just me, or is Gianni super hot in that scene? He's like, she opened the door and my mind went, bow chick a wow wow. Am I wrong.
[00:17:05] Speaker B: I'm going to have to rewatch because my mind was elsewhere.
[00:17:09] Speaker A: Where was your mind?
[00:17:10] Speaker C: I think in contrast to Ray Jamaica.
In contrast to Ray, definitely. I think they played up Ray's awkwardness in this with the weird haircut and general demeanor. So by comparison, Gianni, practical stud.
[00:17:29] Speaker B: I feel like that's part of the irony of this scene where Gianni comes in, the typical good looking guy who has his shit together, and then the bumbling buffoon sidekick is the one that actually draws the attention of the admirer, which I thought was an interesting little play.
[00:17:48] Speaker C: Yeah, she seemed to like Ray at least a little bit just from the jump.
[00:17:56] Speaker B: I think that's special and nice because sometimes you just are drawn to people.
[00:18:00] Speaker C: I liked the running bit about Ray talking a mile a minute and working in that. He's not always going to be a futon delivery guy. He wants to be a journalist. He's going to be a sports writer. Actually, I thought that was pretty good.
[00:18:16] Speaker A: So desperately wants that to be impressive. Yeah, I noticed that, too. Yeah.
[00:18:20] Speaker C: Can I ask you something?
This is all very interesting, and I actually would like to talk about this with you some other time. Maybe. The three of us. Too bad we're suing get together. But are you asking me?
No.
[00:18:36] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:18:37] Speaker C: No, I'm married.
[00:18:38] Speaker A: To Margaret?
[00:18:39] Speaker B: No, to the job.
[00:18:41] Speaker C: Yeah, to the job.
[00:18:42] Speaker A: So is Margaret single?
[00:18:46] Speaker C: She's stenoed. Who's asking?
[00:18:48] Speaker A: Yeah, she's witty. I like this Margaret, this Margaret gal. Margaret, you and I are going to get together later. This is going to be great.
[00:18:55] Speaker C: This is very professional.
We have a witness. One of our star witnesses for the trial saw you at the China Star impossible. Talking about how you're so excited about the name. This was a couple of years ago. You're so excited about the name of the podcast and bragging about how much you know about copyright law and intellectual property. Do you remember that? It would have been about March or April of 2022.
[00:19:26] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:19:27] Speaker B: Why don't you tell us about that day?
[00:19:28] Speaker A: Yeah, I remember that day. So actually, it was the three of us. Well, Alex was waiting in the car, but Adam and I went in to.
[00:19:38] Speaker B: Get the Chinese and get me general so's chicken.
[00:19:43] Speaker A: Hey, I don't know if they have that. Of course they have it. What the heck are you mean, of course they have?
[00:19:49] Speaker C: Look at the big.
[00:19:50] Speaker A: I've never been here before.
[00:19:52] Speaker C: Full size window display of try our general so's chicken.
[00:19:57] Speaker A: Yeah, I see that.
[00:19:59] Speaker C: But just asking for a little bit of situational awareness is all.
[00:20:04] Speaker A: Okay, I'm sorry, I'll let you down again.
[00:20:06] Speaker C: We're going into a new place. Look, this is a new thing for us in our relationship.
The planning session for the podcast got pretty intense, so I know it's not easy working, you know, considering that we don't know each other that well. Looking forward to getting to know you.
[00:20:30] Speaker A: Yeah, I mostly know Alex from the cell, but, yeah, I know it'll go okay. Probably.
[00:20:37] Speaker C: I've been meaning to ask you, is that teardrop tattoo? That's temporary, right? Because it seems like it's moved around your face a couple of times. Just this afternoon.
Well, I think it was a butterfly for a little bit.
[00:20:53] Speaker A: I just can't make up my mind. That's it.
[00:20:56] Speaker C: About whether you've killed someone in prison?
[00:20:59] Speaker A: No, I mean about where to go. I've killed so many people. The teardrop tattoo falls off his face.
[00:21:08] Speaker C: Runs down his face.
[00:21:09] Speaker B: Hi, there. Oh, welcome to the only chinese food restaurant that has a white guy to take your order.
[00:21:16] Speaker C: Yeah, I'm looking around. It's a lot of, like, italian American.
[00:21:22] Speaker B: Yeah, there's no reason for that. Just don't ask about it.
[00:21:25] Speaker A: Hey, Giuseppe, give me the Lomaine.
[00:21:29] Speaker C: Hey, Paulie, we got an order of spring rolls coming out.
[00:21:34] Speaker B: Spring rolls are hot.
[00:21:35] Speaker A: Sorry.
Spring rolls on your 30.
[00:21:38] Speaker C: And remember to put some gravy on those.
Take that.
[00:21:42] Speaker A: A ladle gravy on spring rolls.
[00:21:45] Speaker C: Ladle marinara sauce.
[00:21:47] Speaker B: Can I take your order, please?
[00:21:50] Speaker A: Yeah, this is advertising.
[00:21:52] Speaker C: Who is that big guy in the back there? Sort of eating a giant plate of spaghetti by himself with a tough guy standing behind him?
[00:22:00] Speaker B: Oh, that's big Lenny and bigger Lenny.
[00:22:05] Speaker C: Okay. And they are just patrons. Like, guess, you know, we don't need to get into that.
[00:22:11] Speaker B: I don't think you can afford to get into that, sir.
[00:22:14] Speaker C: Okay. Pricey. Oh, yeah. This did have three dollar signs on Google Maps.
We have a pickup order.
[00:22:22] Speaker A: Yeah, hi. Yeah, I'm picking up from Mike C. Mike C, excellent.
[00:22:27] Speaker B: Hang on.
[00:22:28] Speaker A: For Mike. Chinese food.
[00:22:31] Speaker B: Yeah, I have a Mike C. Mike, chinese food. Excellent. Yeah, that'll be 22, 50.
[00:22:42] Speaker A: Okay. Yeah, sure. Adam, can you help me out? I only got a 20.
[00:22:46] Speaker C: I don't usually carry cash.
You didn't pre pay this. You did this over the phone?
[00:22:53] Speaker A: You're an apple. Pay only. No, I'm not going to prepay it. I got some money. I can come in person and pay.
[00:22:59] Speaker B: Not enough, apparently.
[00:23:00] Speaker C: All right.
[00:23:01] Speaker A: Hey, listen, I don't need anything out of you. I don't need nothing out of you.
[00:23:05] Speaker C: I'm going to run out to the car. And Zeus, see if Alex has two fish.
[00:23:11] Speaker A: Hold on. Your name is Zeus?
[00:23:12] Speaker C: I'll be right back.
[00:23:13] Speaker B: Like the God.
[00:23:13] Speaker A: Is it the greek God of thunder?
[00:23:15] Speaker B: Yes. Let's not get into that.
[00:23:18] Speaker A: I have a lot of questions on that.
[00:23:20] Speaker C: Bigger Lenny is gesturing at Mike. Mike, get back here. Come here.
[00:23:25] Speaker A: Hey.
[00:23:26] Speaker C: What the hell are you doing here?
[00:23:27] Speaker A: Bigger Lenny, what's going on?
[00:23:28] Speaker C: We thought you were sleeping with the fishes. What the hell happened to you?
[00:23:32] Speaker A: No, I didn't sleep with no fishes.
[00:23:34] Speaker C: It was about the time that Vinny got sent away to do a dime. We found clear evidence of you sleeping with the fishes. And we saw cement shoes your size.
[00:23:47] Speaker A: Must have been another mike. You must be getting me mixed up. I think that was Mike.
[00:23:52] Speaker C: Wait, you're Mike Bucatini, right?
[00:23:54] Speaker A: No, I'm Mike chinese food.
[00:23:57] Speaker C: I am so sorry.
[00:23:59] Speaker A: Yeah, no, it happens all the time.
[00:24:00] Speaker B: All right, Adam, where is he?
[00:24:02] Speaker C: Mike's right here.
[00:24:03] Speaker B: Bugattini. Mike, where'd you go? Oh, shoot. Sorry, Mike chinese food. Sorry, I forgot that you changed your name very recently to get away from those mob freaks. Who are these guys?
[00:24:16] Speaker C: Wait a second. Big Lenny stands.
[00:24:18] Speaker A: Alex, get in the cruiser. Alex, get in the cruiser. Let's go. Move it, move it, move it.
[00:24:23] Speaker C: All right, get the chopsticks, fellas. Time to break some legs.
[00:24:27] Speaker A: Chop, chop.
[00:24:28] Speaker B: Chop, chop, chop. You mean snap some legs?
[00:24:30] Speaker A: Yeah.
Mike, Alex and Adam all hop in the now. Basically falling apart PT cruiser. It is now. Eleven years.
[00:24:39] Speaker C: Duct tape, cardboard windows. Yeah, still got that Obama 2012 sticker on there. Covering up a Romney 2012 sticker that was hastily put on there. January of 2013.
[00:24:52] Speaker A: Yeah.
We listen as the car takes several tries for the engine to turn over.
[00:24:57] Speaker C: These mobsters are fully surrounding us now.
[00:25:02] Speaker A: You just got to pump the gas.
[00:25:03] Speaker C: Wait, Alex, you found 250, right? Give me your 20, Mike. Give me your 20. I'm going to roll down the window just a little bit. Look, regardless of what your past relationship may or may not have been with Mike, can you give us the chicken at least? Yeah.
[00:25:22] Speaker A: Here you go.
[00:25:23] Speaker B: That'll be 22ft.
[00:25:24] Speaker C: Here you go. Take it.
[00:25:25] Speaker B: Thanks. What, no tip?
[00:25:27] Speaker A: Get him.
[00:25:28] Speaker C: Fuck.
[00:25:28] Speaker A: Floor it.
[00:25:30] Speaker B: All right. That story literally made.
[00:25:32] Speaker C: No.
[00:25:34] Speaker B: What was the point of telling us that story? Is that how you became Mike D?
[00:25:37] Speaker C: We know all about your history, by the way. How we subpoenaed your mom.
She's not supposed to tell anybody.
Her husband was not happy about it.
[00:25:49] Speaker B: Yeah, we just peanut him.
[00:25:52] Speaker C: So it sounds like by the time you got to the China star. Because the reason I thought of this was Ray and Deborah talking about how they like the China star. And there's the old woman screaming, have a nice day.
It was 1984, so I'm not going to give Ray too hard a time about his impression of the old lady saying, have a nice day. But I mean.
[00:26:17] Speaker B: Yes, honestly, I can't stand white people doing impressions of people of minority cultures. Thank goodness you went to an all italian chinese food place.
[00:26:27] Speaker A: Yeah, we got lucky on that one, I suppose. Yeah.
[00:26:30] Speaker C: Thanks for doing the voices throughout these stories that you're telling us. Have you ever thought about working for audible, doing narration?
[00:26:40] Speaker B: It's very engaging.
[00:26:42] Speaker A: I'll tell you what.
I do a podcast. I don't know if you've ever heard of it, but the podcast is pretty great.
[00:26:48] Speaker C: We have. We're suing you for $6 million about it.
[00:26:51] Speaker A: Oh, that's right.
[00:26:52] Speaker C: Back to that.
Let me ask you.
Similar to how Ray picked up on Deborah's signals when they were talking about the china star, he figures out that when she says, she'll probably be there for lunch tomorrow, Ray says, oh, I had chinese today. And then I thought Gianni's oh, my God was a pretty funny.
[00:27:18] Speaker A: It was really funny, actually. That was really, really funny.
[00:27:21] Speaker B: That was good. Just because it's amazing how Ray has just been fucking up basically from the very, very beginning.
[00:27:26] Speaker A: Yeah, it's not new.
[00:27:28] Speaker B: This is not him trying to get out of it. This is just him like, oh, I like this girl, but I'm just going to be a fucking dumbass. And a little bit of self sabotaging, I can see. I don't know. Do we have any confirmation that Raymond really had any sincere relationships before this?
[00:27:43] Speaker C: There was Lisa.
[00:27:45] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:27:48] Speaker C: But I don't think he was. I mean, not a lot, certainly.
[00:27:53] Speaker A: I'm not 100% certain. I think that we get in a later season, maybe because we haven't heard any of Ray's serious past relationships before this, but I think in a future season we do hear about, like, a high school girlfriend or something like that.
[00:28:07] Speaker C: I think it's fair to say that he doesn't and never had game, but it's not out of the realm of possibility that he had several past relationships that you might discover were you to continue to watch the show, but unfortunately can't or won't?
[00:28:26] Speaker A: If we're wait, I'm banned from watching the rest of.
[00:28:29] Speaker C: Yeah. So in addition to the $6 million, there's going to be an injunction. You're going to get a restraining order, and you won't be allowed to watch.
[00:28:37] Speaker A: Everybody loves, not the racetrain.
[00:28:39] Speaker B: That's right. Injunction junction. What's your function?
[00:28:43] Speaker C: But what I was going to ask. Oh, by the way, Deborah's drinking a can of tab in that scene. You know, Tab? One of the original diet sodas.
[00:28:53] Speaker A: You know your sodas there, Lewis.
[00:28:57] Speaker C: Yeah. I used to be a soda jerk in a past life, before I went to know law school.
[00:29:03] Speaker B: Now he's just a you.
[00:29:06] Speaker A: I like you, Bill. You got some ziggers.
[00:29:09] Speaker B: Shut up. I'll fill you alive.
[00:29:10] Speaker A: Margaret, give me some, Margaret, give me some. Come on.
[00:29:13] Speaker C: She can't take her hand off the steno pad thing.
[00:29:18] Speaker B: She's trying to concentrate. Look at those eyes. She's just asleep. Hang on, Margaret.
Margaret.
[00:29:25] Speaker C: There she goes, right into typing. Let's talk about.
We'll get back to. Sorry, I know we've got off on a little tangent. Get back to the deposition in a second. I just want to mention. And this will tie in. So Deborah and Ray agree to go out next day at one. Then Ray and know futons finished, they go out into the hallway. Ray, they realize Ray forgot to give her the futon cover.
He accidentally walks in on her naked.
[00:29:58] Speaker A: Incredible, incredible comedy.
[00:30:01] Speaker C: She very quickly, after the futon men left, 30 seconds. Just immediately, fully naked. Went to the shower, didn't even try out the futon.
[00:30:12] Speaker B: To be fair, I have done this.
[00:30:14] Speaker A: You have done this.
[00:30:15] Speaker C: 30 seconds, Bill.
[00:30:17] Speaker A: Of course, Bill, that's a little insane. I give a courtesy, five minutes minimum.
[00:30:22] Speaker B: No, it's her fault for not locking the door either.
[00:30:26] Speaker C: Well, yes, that is true.
[00:30:28] Speaker A: I do agree with that.
[00:30:29] Speaker B: If you're going to get naked, lock the door. That's like the fifth amendment or something.
[00:30:35] Speaker A: Yeah, that is what I'm pleading every single time. For the record, anytime you ask a question, I plead that I need the door locked. To get naked?
[00:30:44] Speaker B: Yeah, to get naked. I need to lock the door before I get naked.
[00:30:48] Speaker C: The reason I wanted to bring this up is because another of our star witnesses is your first wife, Marie.
[00:30:55] Speaker A: No.
[00:30:57] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:30:57] Speaker A: I thought she died.
[00:31:00] Speaker C: Not this one.
[00:31:01] Speaker A: When the jokers got babbled.
[00:31:03] Speaker C: No, I mean the one that you met at Sarah Lawrence back in the.
[00:31:08] Speaker A: Remember her?
[00:31:09] Speaker C: As Mike is remembering her, he's holding a pen. He flips it up in the air camera. We fade into the pen being replaced by a mortarboard cap, and it lands back in Mike's hand at his graduation from Sarah Lawrence in 1987.
[00:31:27] Speaker A: Pen out. It is revealed that Mike has the biggest mullet that you have ever seen in your life. Like, goes halfway down the back. It's great.
[00:31:35] Speaker C: Woo. I can't believe we finally graduated. Mike, this is incredible.
[00:31:40] Speaker A: Listen, Chester, it's been such a pleasure these past four years. This is great. This is awesome. I can't wait to use my media studies degree. I'm going to change the world, man. Everything's going to be different. How about you? What are you going to know?
[00:31:51] Speaker C: I majored in national security. Defense.
National security, comma, defense. Bachelor of arts. Fingers crossed my application to the FBI gets accepted.
[00:32:02] Speaker A: Bros.
[00:32:03] Speaker B: I just stole his TV.
[00:32:06] Speaker A: Whoa, Donnie, I didn't realize that you could do that.
[00:32:09] Speaker B: Yeah, I stole it to celebrate my degree in criminal psychology, man.
[00:32:15] Speaker C: Wow, that's a real. I don't know if it's a freudian slip, but it's certainly a freudian state.
[00:32:20] Speaker B: Oh, sorry. I didn't realize my nipple was out.
[00:32:23] Speaker C: Well, hey, I mean, I'm shirtless under the robe. What about you guys?
[00:32:28] Speaker A: I was staring at his nipple the whole time. I lost track of the conversation. I'm sorry.
[00:32:32] Speaker B: It's really pointy.
[00:32:34] Speaker C: Well, if you're distracted easily by nipples, check out the nipples on her.
All three of them turn their heads in slow motion.
[00:32:46] Speaker B: Very modestly dressed woman.
[00:32:50] Speaker C: She's wearing a graduation cap and gown.
[00:32:54] Speaker A: She's walking out of the church, but it's cold.
[00:33:01] Speaker B: Just imagine the nipples on her.
[00:33:03] Speaker C: Wow.
Mike, isn't that Marie? Didn't you guys just have biology together last semester?
[00:33:15] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, that's right. That's right.
She was my lab partner. Or, well, specifically, she was Robbie's lab partner. And Robbie was the roommate of my brother's lab partner.
[00:33:28] Speaker C: We know this. We're your best friends.
[00:33:31] Speaker A: Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. It's weird. Guys, what am I going to do? What am I going to do?
We're never, ever losing touch, right, guys?
[00:33:41] Speaker B: We will ride until we die. I have literally never got going to talk to you until I die. So if you don't hear from me, it's because I died.
[00:33:49] Speaker C: And, hey, man, if my backup plan. FBI. Great. Whatever. If our recaps of my two dads get picked up for the radio, man, we are not only going to be friends forever, we're going to be working together forever. Because that show is never going off the air.
[00:34:05] Speaker A: Don't you forget it. Because we are going to change the game here. I'm going to go talk to Marie and see if she wants to get in on it.
[00:34:14] Speaker C: Before you go over there, let me just. I gotta tell you something because I don't know who knows what's going to happen this summer, but I just want you to know that I always thought you were the coolest, most handsome, luckiest and funniest guy that I ever knew. Right, Donnie? Don't you feel the same way about Mike?
[00:34:36] Speaker B: Thanks, man. I feel the same way about me too.
[00:34:41] Speaker A: He's going through Donnie. Chester. Chester, you're incredible. You're a great man. We are never, ever losing this band of brothers. Or else my name isn't Mike Adonis. Okay?
[00:34:58] Speaker C: Mike Adonis. Hmm.
[00:35:01] Speaker A: Hey. Yeah, that's me. Hey, I'm glad you remembered my name. You left this notebook in our biology class.
[00:35:07] Speaker C: Oh, Mike, that's my private journal.
I can't imagine how I would. You didn't read it, did you?
[00:35:17] Speaker A: No, I wouldn't ever read more than 30 pages of it.
That's ridiculous.
[00:35:24] Speaker C: Well, as long as you didn't read page 31.
[00:35:27] Speaker A: Why? What's on page 31?
[00:35:30] Speaker C: It says, I really hope Mike asks me out at graduation.
Oh, yeah, Mike Adonis is so dreamy.
Also, it says eggs, milk, butter.
[00:35:43] Speaker A: Yeah, I saw that part. I can't believe there are people at this campus named Mike Adonis.
[00:35:50] Speaker C: No, Mike, it's you.
You're the coolest, sexiest guy at Sarah Lawrence College.
[00:35:58] Speaker A: You got to be thinking of someone else.
[00:36:02] Speaker C: Mike, I'm telling you, I want to go out with you.
[00:36:08] Speaker A: Oh, okay.
[00:36:09] Speaker C: So, reason I'm not wearing anything under this gown. I know. You're a nip man.
[00:36:14] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[00:36:16] Speaker B: Wow.
[00:36:17] Speaker A: You really think very low of me if you think that was going to be my primary motivator for coming over here.
[00:36:25] Speaker C: But it worked when we covered it in biology. When we covered nips in biology, you were more attentive. The professor had to restrain you to the desk.
[00:36:35] Speaker A: Yeah, the nips unit was the only one I got above an 87 on.
[00:36:41] Speaker C: Yeah, you were trying to cop a feel on the cat. We were.
[00:36:48] Speaker A: Listen, that cat had great nips.
[00:36:52] Speaker C: So, Mike, what do you say?
You want to go get a drink or.
[00:36:59] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah, let's do it. Let's do. Go get. Let's go get a drink. Let's go get a drink. We cut to hoppy speakeasy.
The frog themed speakeasy.
[00:37:11] Speaker C: Wow, this place is so fun, Mike. I can't believe I didn't know this was here.
[00:37:16] Speaker B: Ribbon. Welcome to my speakeasy. How can I help you?
[00:37:20] Speaker A: It's hoppy.
[00:37:21] Speaker C: I'll have the lily pad ribbon.
I think that's a yes. Go ahead, Mike.
[00:37:28] Speaker A: I'll have a toad light.
[00:37:31] Speaker C: Toad light ribbon.
[00:37:33] Speaker A: Yeah. Hoppy, it feels like you're judging me right here.
[00:37:37] Speaker B: Toad light. I mean, it's kind of a.
What do we say? It's a tadpole's drink, not a frog's drink.
[00:37:49] Speaker C: I would be really impressed if you ordered a horny toad. That's a man frog. Frog's drink.
[00:37:57] Speaker A: I don't know, guys. That's a lot of. All right, I'll do it for you, Marie.
[00:38:01] Speaker C: It's 100% ethyl alcohol.
[00:38:04] Speaker A: All right, you know what? Give me one. Give me a horny toad.
And then I woke up at home. I don't remember the rest of the night.
[00:38:13] Speaker C: That lines up with what Marie told us that you had a frog wedding that night, which is sort of like a Vegas wedding.
[00:38:23] Speaker A: Yeah, I woke up with the ring on my finger. I don't remember anything else. But know what you gonna do?
[00:38:28] Speaker C: Well, if you're her, immediately get it annulled.
[00:38:32] Speaker B: Yeah, don't remind know, Mike, your lack of understanding and able to interpret obvious signals kind of reminds me of Ray in this episode.
[00:38:43] Speaker A: Yeah, absolutely.
I saw that similarity. I felt very seen with Ray this episode.
[00:38:49] Speaker C: You see yourself as more of a ray than a Gianni.
[00:38:53] Speaker B: Then Ray got the girl.
[00:38:56] Speaker C: Oh, that's true. But Gianni was so hot that Mike felt the need to bring it up in a deposition.
[00:39:03] Speaker A: He was very attractive in this episode.
[00:39:05] Speaker C: Margaret, you got that?
Oh, she got it. Let me ask you another question, Mike. Did you do any kind of search on the patent office or in any kind of copyright trademark database for everybody loves Raymond to make sure you weren't violating Paramount's IP using this as your title?
[00:39:29] Speaker A: What does IP stand for?
[00:39:30] Speaker C: It stands for intellectual property.
[00:39:34] Speaker A: Really?
Yeah. But we learned something today. This is good. This is good. No, we didn't do any of that.
[00:39:41] Speaker B: What I really don't understand is. Well, I think we've got most of the story covered.
Do we? What I'm missing is where Adam comes into this story. He was with you at the chinese place, but we didn't really learn how you two met.
[00:39:55] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. All right, so that was actually about a year after the eggs incident.
[00:40:02] Speaker C: Come on. I'm in the system. I have Radio shack credit.
[00:40:05] Speaker A: I'm sorry, sir.
If you're not popping up, I can't do nothing for you.
[00:40:11] Speaker C: Come on, man. You guys are shutting down.
Why are you haggling with me over these cheap ass microphones? I mean, come on. But the problem is, do you take Coles cash?
[00:40:25] Speaker A: We don't take Coles.
[00:40:27] Speaker C: I mean, I've got a lot of Coles cash.
[00:40:29] Speaker A: How much Coles cash do you have?
[00:40:31] Speaker C: Here, check this out.
That's $50 in Coles cash right there.
[00:40:35] Speaker A: That's 50 Coles cash dollars. Let me take that.
[00:40:37] Speaker C: Buy yourself some Levi's.
Thank you very much. One leg.
[00:40:42] Speaker A: You only owe us 40 more dollars.
[00:40:44] Speaker C: Oh, come on.
[00:40:45] Speaker B: All right. Mike, do you think they sell eggs in here?
[00:40:47] Speaker A: They better. I don't know where else there would be eggs if it's not in this radio shack.
[00:40:51] Speaker B: Here, let's see.
[00:40:52] Speaker C: Come on, man. Give them to me. Let go.
[00:40:57] Speaker A: This is shoplifting.
[00:40:58] Speaker C: I can't. This is not shoplifting if you don't let me pick him up. Asshole.
[00:41:02] Speaker B: That radio shack employee is trying to steal store property from that guy. Well, we got to help him.
[00:41:08] Speaker A: Alex, give me your last egg.
[00:41:09] Speaker B: Okay. He's special, though, so please treat him with. Oh, my God.
[00:41:13] Speaker A: Hey, guys.
[00:41:14] Speaker C: Here, I'll go get you a towel. Let me just grab this and. Come on.
Oh, God, guys, thank you so much.
You threw that egg, right?
[00:41:27] Speaker A: Yeah.
That was the fastest egg I've ever thrown. I've been throwing eggs for years.
[00:41:33] Speaker B: It was my egg, though. Wow.
[00:41:35] Speaker C: I owe you guys. This is great. Do you know what a podcast is?
[00:41:40] Speaker B: Vaguely. Is that like Joe Rogan?
[00:41:42] Speaker C: Yeah, it's like Joe Rogan.
I'm in the bachelor of fine arts and poetry program at Hofstra, and I have to do a podcast about Emily Dickinson for an assignment. Okay, but I just moved here. I was living in Philadelphia, incidentally. I got in a fight, and then I had to move here, and I was clean out. I was really counting on that radio shack credit to get the microphones because I'm not going to do a half ass job on this school assignment podcast.
[00:42:16] Speaker A: No, you can't. If it's a school assignment, then, yeah. What do we do?
[00:42:21] Speaker B: These are really nice microphones.
[00:42:22] Speaker C: Thanks. I actually got two extra ones that I didn't even need.
[00:42:25] Speaker B: But, hey, you know what you could do?
[00:42:28] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:42:28] Speaker B: As thanks, let Mike and I help you with your project. Oh, Mike, don't blow this for me. Why would we been talking about being famous for a long time. This is our chance.
[00:42:36] Speaker A: We have. But I thought we'd be famous for the eggs.
[00:42:39] Speaker B: Yeah, but that hasn't been going anywhere. It's been a year, and we only have one egg left. Wait, no. You broke that egg.
[00:42:45] Speaker C: Wait, are you the guys from that Buzzfeed list of unsuccessful vigilantes?
[00:42:50] Speaker B: Yeah. That feed only had ten views.
[00:42:54] Speaker C: You're the egg bandits, right?
[00:42:56] Speaker A: We tried that moniker for a while. We then changed for the impractical yokers, and that didn't really catch on.
We tried being the shell smashers just to go for a little something more badass. That didn't go great.
[00:43:12] Speaker C: Yeah, none of those names were on the list. This was the egg bandits. Yeah. This was the egg bandits.
[00:43:19] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:43:20] Speaker C: But honestly, podcasting is having a moment right now. You know Conan.
[00:43:25] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:43:26] Speaker B: Of the O'Brien fame.
[00:43:27] Speaker C: That's right. He's doing a podcast now. It's brand new. Maybe, or it's been out for a.
[00:43:34] Speaker A: That's. Listen, if it's got Joe Rogan and.
[00:43:39] Speaker C: Joe Rogan, and we.
[00:43:42] Speaker A: If it's got Kogan, then we got to get on it. We got to jump on the stream. This is awesome.
[00:43:47] Speaker B: Let's get on the Kogan wagon.
[00:43:49] Speaker A: I remember reading about this, actually. They're doing a project at Lynbrook University, a grad school thing where you get your master's in podcasting.
[00:43:57] Speaker C: Really?
[00:43:57] Speaker A: Want to go see what that's.
[00:44:00] Speaker C: I mean, I have enough transfer credits to go directly from not finishing my bachelor's in poetry to going into a master's program.
[00:44:07] Speaker B: Well, excellent. I'm Alex, and this is Mike. And you're basically stuck with us for the rest of your.
[00:44:15] Speaker A: That's what I said to I will.
[00:44:17] Speaker B: Never let go of your hand, whatever your name is.
[00:44:20] Speaker C: I'm Adam. Oh, that is a lot of yoke. Oh, God. Wow. Okay, so you guys met while robbing a radio shack?
[00:44:30] Speaker A: Well, specifically, Adam was robbing the radio shack. We were just there looking for eggs.
[00:44:34] Speaker C: Your name's in the police report. We pulled the police report. Did you know that clerk died three days later? He was allergic to eggs.
[00:44:44] Speaker A: I was unaware of that, actually.
[00:44:46] Speaker C: Things actually, because you guys weren't around, the coroner actually ruled it as suicide, so it was pretty bleak for his family.
[00:44:52] Speaker A: Oh, no.
[00:44:53] Speaker B: It was actually the first recorded egg aside in all of the United States.
[00:44:58] Speaker C: All right, that tracks with the depositions that Adam and Alex gave about how you guys know. It sort of reminded me of when they were talking. I was sort of making comparative notes, and that was actually when the episode of everybody loves Raymond was playing on the background. You tell me if this is similar or not. Sort of reminds me of how Deborah met Marie in sort of inauspicious know. Right after Ray announces that to Robert that he canceled the date because he saw Deborah naked, he left a message on her machine. Then Deborah shows up, and, of course, Marie and Robert intercept her at the find. Do you see the parallel there, or what do you think?
[00:45:47] Speaker A: I don't know if I see that connection necessarily, but I will say it was really funny.
Specifically, the scene when Ray was sitting around and was like, yeah, I think the problem was I didn't turn quick enough. And then he reenacts it and has the moment. He's like, oh, my God.
I thought that got a chuckle out of me. I like that bit.
[00:46:08] Speaker C: That was great.
[00:46:09] Speaker B: There were a lot of good bits in this episode.
[00:46:10] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:46:11] Speaker B: There were no Peter Boyle.
[00:46:12] Speaker C: No Peter Boyle. We get Marie. So Ray and Robert sitting at the table. Robert has a very 80s, kind of like early seasons of full house. John Stamos hair piece. So not the afro that he had in the car, but something a little more.
[00:46:33] Speaker A: He's changing his hair all over the place, this guy.
[00:46:36] Speaker C: Yeah. And then Marie coming in to tell Ray or to tell know, get out of your father's chair. He's coming home. He hates the imprint that Robert leaves on his chair, which is.
[00:46:49] Speaker B: It's probably very large and round.
[00:46:50] Speaker C: Probably very. I don't know about round. Does Robert have back?
[00:46:54] Speaker A: I would guess Robert, listen, if you're in the police force, you got to be squatting at least 180, if not 220.
You got to imagine he's got some.
[00:47:04] Speaker C: Girth down there, but only in the rear.
[00:47:08] Speaker A: Oh, no. I think on both sides, but definitely on the rear.
[00:47:11] Speaker C: Wow.
Wrap around girth.
[00:47:15] Speaker A: Wraparound girth.
[00:47:16] Speaker C: Margaret, you get that?
[00:47:17] Speaker A: That's what they called me in college, did that.
[00:47:19] Speaker C: Flashback.
Wow. Mac. I think we can all agree that this is the most impressed we've been during a hazing that thing. I mean, fellas, agreement. Agreement. He's in frat. And new nickname, wraparound girth.
You got a fat ass, man. What?
[00:47:38] Speaker A: Can I get in the shower now?
[00:47:40] Speaker C: Yeah, we're all getting in. That's part of it.
[00:47:43] Speaker B: Yeah, if you could fit.
[00:47:44] Speaker A: Oh, God.
[00:47:45] Speaker C: Yeah. We're going to see how many. It's the classic 1950s phone booth thing where they tried to see how many people they could fit in a phone booth. But we're doing that with a single occupancy shower stall. All the frat brothers together and Mike's colossal backside. Yes. I mean, that's actually going to make it easier, because that's a platform for Butch to stand on. Butch is usually the base of, you know, I think, honestly, with that ass.
[00:48:14] Speaker A: You know, can I say. Yep.
[00:48:15] Speaker C: So, yeah, it's that and then drinking the piss.
[00:48:20] Speaker A: I'd like to leave this frat.
[00:48:23] Speaker B: It's not your own piss.
[00:48:25] Speaker C: So Deborah showing up. Right. And we'll get back to the deposition in a second. Deborah showing up. Robert answers the door.
Oh, you mentioned this isn't a Peter Boyle episode. And then we got the imprint. And then we got Marie saying she can't wait until Frank retires. He's going to be so much more pleasant. It's a real flashback joke. It's a real Marvin forward joke.
[00:48:51] Speaker B: Kind of big fan of those. Love those.
[00:48:53] Speaker C: Well, it's a flashback relative to where the show is taking know. I don't mean. What is this tenet? We can talk. Know how time works all day.
[00:49:04] Speaker A: Timelines. Yeah.
[00:49:06] Speaker C: Temporal pincer.
[00:49:08] Speaker B: And then Deborah shows up.
[00:49:09] Speaker C: Deborah shows up.
[00:49:11] Speaker B: When she asks for Ray, Robert kind of gives her, like, the once over, and he realizes that she's the naked.
[00:49:16] Speaker A: Lady, that she's the zebra with breasts.
[00:49:19] Speaker B: And you could definitely see in his face that he's, like, thinking about it.
[00:49:22] Speaker C: Well, when she first shows up, he's like, oh, hello. And he's sort of putting on the charm. And then, yeah, she asks for Ray.
[00:49:29] Speaker A: I got to say, I get it. I get it. It's a good joke. It's a fine joke.
If someone arrives at my door, I don't care how cute you are, my first instinct is not to flirt.
[00:49:39] Speaker B: That's why you're single.
[00:49:40] Speaker C: That is why you're single.
We have multiple people who have testified that that's why you're single.
[00:49:47] Speaker A: Oh, I should have flirted with all those mailmen.
[00:49:50] Speaker C: It's mostly, yeah, mail carriers and delivery people have felt spurned by you. A lot of people are saying that you clearly rejected them while wearing a bathrobe and clearly having almost gone into the shower, which is confusing for them.
[00:50:09] Speaker A: I get it.
That is a mixed signal.
I didn't think about it. Now you've pointed it out, and now I'm like, okay, I could see where this could go wrong.
[00:50:20] Speaker C: I'm glad that this is a learning opportunity for you. So Deborah shows up also, who shows.
[00:50:26] Speaker B: Up to a guy's house? Just like that.
[00:50:29] Speaker C: She was looking.
[00:50:30] Speaker A: Not just a guy's house, a stranger's house.
[00:50:33] Speaker B: She could have gotten, like, his phone number from his work. She didn't have to show up to.
[00:50:40] Speaker C: His house, but she wanted to. That's what we find out in the last scene of the flashback where the futon was never loose. It's all part of Deborah's game.
[00:50:53] Speaker B: She is playing a long game, and.
[00:50:55] Speaker C: I respect Marie coming out of the kitchen when Debra comes in, a girl for Raymond, and we hear Deborah introduce herself with her maiden name, Deborah Whelan, to which Ray introduces his Marie and Robert, his roommates.
[00:51:18] Speaker A: I would have done the same.
I get it. What a lie. What a lie. Robert. I can understand. I can understand Robert being like, oh, here's my roommate, Marie. Marie is clearly the mother. I don't know. I feel like I could see the resemblance and everything. What a bad.
[00:51:36] Speaker C: Well, would it surprise you to know that bill and I are roommates?
[00:51:40] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:51:40] Speaker C: And would it. Surprise.
[00:51:41] Speaker B: Problem.
[00:51:41] Speaker C: Would it surprise you further to know that our other roommate is Margaret?
[00:51:46] Speaker A: Margaret, how much do you pay in rent?
[00:51:49] Speaker C: 125.
[00:51:51] Speaker B: Yeah, 125.
[00:51:53] Speaker A: That's a great deal. You guys need a fourth roommate or more.
[00:51:57] Speaker C: It would be a conflict of interest. But after the.
Actually, this trial, the judgment is kind of going to wreck your credit.
[00:52:06] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:52:08] Speaker C: If we let him move in, the rent is going to go up. Yeah. We're going to pass.
[00:52:14] Speaker A: Piece of shit.
[00:52:16] Speaker C: Yeah. So Deborah. I thought it was Deborah.
[00:52:19] Speaker A: And then Marie says she's not the girl for you. And I thought that was a good little bit, too. In the previous episode, we got the bit of Marie being like, with Deborah. We knew what we were getting. So I like the idea that all of these snap judgments are being formed in this scene specifically.
[00:52:36] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:52:36] Speaker B: Oh, of course.
[00:52:38] Speaker C: I also like Deborah's initial impression of why Ray canceled the date.
She thinks that it was because he saw her naked and didn't like what he saw. It was a bad angle, bad lighting.
[00:52:52] Speaker B: Which, I mean, Ray came out on top for that one.
At that point, he could save it from this point where it's like he got lucky that it was not the reason, but I know he was embarrassed, and bam, he's back.
[00:53:08] Speaker C: He didn't want her to think he was a pervert.
But it turns know again another time, we can go deeper into this. Let me ask, you know, once you started the podcast and it got pretty ever, did it ever cross your mind to pay paramount any kind of licensing fee to use the name or anything like that?
[00:53:36] Speaker A: So after we moved to, we started to contact some of our professors there. We started touching base with.
We met the guy that did Rogan. That got Rogan on the map. It was Mr. Factor. I'm professor factor. Fear.
[00:53:52] Speaker C: Fear is my first name.
[00:53:53] Speaker A: Professor Fear Factor. Yeah. Nice to meet you.
[00:53:55] Speaker C: Is that a worm on your.
[00:53:57] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:53:58] Speaker C: Okay.
Professor Nicholson put us in touch with you.
[00:54:03] Speaker A: His name is Darren.
[00:54:04] Speaker C: Hello, Darren. Professor Nicholson put us in touch with you. He said you're in charge of the podcasting department here.
[00:54:13] Speaker A: Yeah, that's me. Come on in. Come on. Take a seat.
[00:54:15] Speaker C: Sure. Oh, wow.
[00:54:16] Speaker A: You see? Take a look at my hall of podcasting greats.
[00:54:23] Speaker C: Just a picture of Joe Rogan.
[00:54:26] Speaker B: That's a lot of great.
[00:54:28] Speaker A: It's a new forum, but just you wait. In a few years, I'm going to have so many other people here.
[00:54:33] Speaker C: So, we heard that you're trying to get this program off the ground, and you've got some grant funding from. Is it the Bill and Melinda the.
[00:54:45] Speaker A: Mill and Belinda Gates foundation? Yeah.
[00:54:47] Speaker C: No, Will and Belinda Bates foundation. Sorry.
[00:54:50] Speaker A: Oh, so you have read the thing and you're still making me try.
[00:54:54] Speaker C: I'm looking at the brochure on your desk, which.
[00:54:57] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[00:54:58] Speaker C: What are all these black boxes with holes to put your hand in on your desk?
[00:55:03] Speaker A: Nothing. You don't need to worry about that. You see, a little tarantula comes through.
[00:55:11] Speaker B: I'll get him.
It's like whack a mole.
[00:55:17] Speaker A: My hand.
[00:55:19] Speaker C: I'm so sorry.
It sounds like you've got a need. You've got supply or. No, we've got supply because we want to do a podcast and you're desperate. Your demand. So what do you say we work something out here?
[00:55:36] Speaker B: We've got big plans.
[00:55:37] Speaker C: Yeah, we have a whole pitch worked out.
[00:55:40] Speaker A: I mean, sure, yeah, I'll listen. You guys can give me your pitch.
Can I get you guys anything? Can I get you.
Do you have cow eyeball juice?
We got mealworms that we could put that in the blender.
[00:55:56] Speaker C: Do you have Dasani? We'll take.
[00:56:01] Speaker A: We can, we can do.
Yeah, yeah, we can do. Hey, uh, Jamie. Jamie, can you come in and bring in all the stuff? Yay.
[00:56:10] Speaker C: Okay, here you go.
[00:56:12] Speaker A: Jamie's an up and coming podcasting talent. Rogan needs an assistant. We might send him over his way pretty soon.
[00:56:18] Speaker B: Everybody loves my melodious voice.
[00:56:21] Speaker A: Hey, say that again.
[00:56:24] Speaker B: Everybody loves my.
[00:56:25] Speaker A: Stop. I got it. Whatever you guys are going to pitch, you're done. You're doing a podcast on everybody loves Raymond.
[00:56:32] Speaker B: But we were going to do a friends rewatch podcast everybody friends, then they're done.
[00:56:37] Speaker A: That Jamie's got the right idea. They're doing everybody loves Raymond. Everybody loves that show. It's a great show.
[00:56:43] Speaker B: So why that show specifically?
[00:56:44] Speaker C: To be totally transparent.
You called our bluff, so we didn't have a pitch. We're fine to do whatever you want. I mean, it's your money.
[00:56:54] Speaker A: Yeah, but why are we doing everybody Raymond? I mean, nobody's watched that show in decades. Oh, you're going to change that. You're going to be the reason people start watching everybody loves Raymond. We're going to put Raymond and Lindbrook back on this map. This is a big deal.
[00:57:11] Speaker B: We do live in Lynbrook that actually could be a pretty good hook. I think that makes sense. I mean, we could know. Sell it to the town. Really make them a part of the culture. We could kind of shape up this town and make it interesting.
[00:57:28] Speaker A: I just want to. Just want to make Rogan actually work for know.
[00:57:32] Speaker B: I think you guys can do that. Well, we'll get you a pilot by, I don't know, six months.
[00:57:38] Speaker A: Yeah, it's reasonable.
[00:57:39] Speaker B: Great. We'll just take that money and leave.
[00:57:41] Speaker A: Great. So, cockroaches, anyone?
[00:57:45] Speaker C: Do we have to eat the cockroaches to get the money?
[00:57:47] Speaker A: No, these are just good.
[00:57:49] Speaker C: Oh, okay. No definite pass.
[00:57:51] Speaker A: All right. You guys are missing out. I'll take one, Mike.
[00:57:56] Speaker B: All right, I see. That's interesting.
[00:57:58] Speaker C: Okay. I guess that doesn't really answer my question. Whatever it was, I can't remember.
[00:58:05] Speaker A: What was your question?
[00:58:06] Speaker C: I can't remember.
[00:58:07] Speaker B: You distracted me so much, I literally don't recall.
[00:58:11] Speaker C: Sorry. My papers are all over the place.
Half of this is notes about everybody loves Raymond. I was just sort of absent mindedly writing these down. While we were interviewing your friends.
And then the other half is.
I mean, I have a whole bunch of stuff about Ray showing up at the. Supposedly to fix the futon.
[00:58:35] Speaker B: He came in all dressed.
[00:58:37] Speaker C: Yeah, it's his fixing clothes.
[00:58:39] Speaker B: Which is not true.
[00:58:40] Speaker C: It's kind of sweet that he's trying to impress her. I like the callback. Know the reason he walked in on Debra before was he heard her saying. Coming from the shower. And he took it as come in. He heard it as come in. So this time, Deborah calls, come in. And. Long pause. Come in. And beat. And then she finally goes up to the door.
[00:59:08] Speaker B: I think that was the right answer.
[00:59:10] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:59:10] Speaker B: I think that was the right call.
[00:59:11] Speaker A: Absolutely. Even if he hears come in, he can't barge in on that one. This is the correct play.
[00:59:18] Speaker B: Yeah, he's not making that mistake again until he sees her naked on purpose.
[00:59:23] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:59:24] Speaker A: Which I did love. I'm sorry. We're flesh forwarding a little bit. I did like the thing where they're making out on the floor. And she says, I'm not like this. You're not going to see me naked for at least another six months.
[00:59:37] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:59:38] Speaker A: I don't know why, but that got me a little bit.
[00:59:40] Speaker C: That was nice.
Yeah. He comes over, finds out that the futon is not actually loose. And then she pivots. She, quote, made too much food. And then again, like, incredible density on Ray. He tells her he'll eat it in the truck.
[00:59:59] Speaker B: That was funny.
[01:00:00] Speaker C: And then she asks him to sit.
[01:00:02] Speaker A: I really liked that running bit. Yeah, I'm sorry.
[01:00:05] Speaker C: The line of Ray asking if she was making all that food for someone and they didn't show up, and she's not looking at him. She's still working on the food, and she says, they showed up.
[01:00:20] Speaker B: That was kind of cute. It's very sweet. And I thought that the dish being lemon chicken was kind of cute because they've joked about the lemon chicken in the past and they will continue to in the future, but to know they have, like, a special tie to it, like that is kind of adorable.
[01:00:36] Speaker A: Yeah, it is.
[01:00:37] Speaker C: It's nice.
We learned that Deborah did PR for the Rangers. I don't think we ever got that specifically.
[01:00:45] Speaker A: We knew that she was PR. I don't think we got the sports.
[01:00:49] Speaker C: I think we might have even had PR for a hockey team, but we didn't have the.
[01:00:56] Speaker A: If we weren't, we weren't sure if it was rangers or.
[01:00:59] Speaker C: We also. We get a good line in that scene of Deborah saying, your family seems nice. And Ray saying, yeah, they seem nice, which is pretty funny. Speaking of the food being the lemon chicken, the audience reacted to that like they've never heard a callback in a sitcom before. It was just this little pop of laughter, like they thought it was the funniest thing in the world. And then Ray says, I could eat this for the rest of my life. The way that scene ends with him getting up to get her a drink of something and then absolutely smashing her face with the freezer door.
[01:01:42] Speaker A: That's a funny bit.
[01:01:44] Speaker C: That was a great, true slapstick right there.
[01:01:47] Speaker B: Some good physical comedy. Season three really stepped it up with the physical comedy.
[01:01:51] Speaker A: You're not wrong.
[01:01:52] Speaker C: And we come out of them making out on the floor to the of. I guess they were both reminiscing about that. And then Deborah says, well, here's some more chicken.
And she asks, how is it? Ray says, great. Still great. And then slow zoom out on them and the kids eating in silence. Weirdly, I mean, poignantly ending.
[01:02:20] Speaker B: Yeah, weirdly. Like, hey, we're a serious show. Take us seriously ending.
[01:02:25] Speaker C: Hey, this is what family is all about, kind of ending.
[01:02:29] Speaker B: Yeah. I don't know if they earned that serious moment.
[01:02:32] Speaker A: I don't know. I liked it. I thought it felt fun. Thought it was nice. That was sweet.
[01:02:37] Speaker C: I thought it was sweet. I'd be hard pushed. Hard pushed.
What is the phrase? Hard pressed. Thank you. I would be hard pressed to say it was fun or funny, but it was just sort of like, oh, that's nice.
[01:02:52] Speaker B: Well, I'm running out of questions here. What say you?
[01:02:56] Speaker C: I have one more question, and it's about your rating scale that you use. Did you know that in 1997, Paramount got a trademark on the phrase barometer bullshit. We were going to put in cereal boxes a little toy thermometer that had a bunch of raised catchphrases on it. Unfortunately, we couldn't find a cereal box that was interested in that. No cereal wanted to be associated with the show at that time. We almost got flutey fllakes, but then, unfortunately, they were discontinued before we could close the deal.
[01:03:38] Speaker A: I believe that.
[01:03:39] Speaker C: So. Did you know that?
[01:03:40] Speaker A: No, I didn't.
[01:03:41] Speaker C: Did you tell us a little bit about how that came to be your classic rating scale?
[01:03:47] Speaker A: Yeah.
So is this chicken done yet?
[01:03:51] Speaker C: Yeah, I think so. Let me grab the thermometer here.
[01:03:55] Speaker B: Hang on, guys. Can you be quiet? I'm trying to work on this deal for our new recording studio. There's a real good, sweet deal on the 100th floor of this tower downtown.
[01:04:05] Speaker C: Really?
[01:04:05] Speaker B: Oh, take it. Just. The thing is, we need to pitch what we're doing, so we also have to work on the layout of our show. What we're going to talk about all that stuff?
It's not just about what we're going to say. It's about we need a beginning, a middle and end.
[01:04:23] Speaker C: I got to be honest, I'm not really that passionate about everybody loves Raymond, so I'm sort of at a loss as to what.
[01:04:32] Speaker B: You just start that way, dummy. And then you slowly and steadily fade out over time and hope no one notices. Trust me, by the end of season three, we won't even be called everybody loves everybody loves Raymond anymore.
[01:04:44] Speaker C: That doesn't sound like something that would ever happen.
Well, I guess to start, we could talk about the episode and set up the historical context about it. I guess in the middle, we could do, like, go scene by scene and break down what happens and provide little moments of levity or interesting facts along the way. But how do you end that? Do you just say, all right, well, we're done.
[01:05:15] Speaker A: The chicken's finished. I'd say this goose is cooked. Ten out of ten. This goose is finished.
[01:05:20] Speaker B: Wait a minute, Mike, say that again.
[01:05:22] Speaker A: This goose is cooked.
[01:05:23] Speaker B: Yeah, that's a great line.
That's how we should finish our episodes.
[01:05:29] Speaker A: We should do that. Yeah, but, yeah, I mean, I was just telling you that according to the thermometer, we're done here.
[01:05:35] Speaker C: Wait a second. What's the main character's name in this show again, Raymond. Or according to some, Robert, the last name, the barone thermometer. Barone.
[01:05:48] Speaker B: Raymond thermometer.
[01:05:49] Speaker C: Barone.
[01:05:53] Speaker A: Let's do the barometer. And that way we can turn this entire thing into a thing where we judge people. This would be great.
[01:06:03] Speaker B: And actually, yeah, Mr. Factor might like that a lot, too.
[01:06:06] Speaker A: Because Professor Factor would love that.
[01:06:08] Speaker B: Yeah.
It would document data progress. If we rated him every episode. And data equals a good grade.
[01:06:20] Speaker C: I'm on board with it.
[01:06:21] Speaker B: And for example, we could rate ten. Could be like the great dads of TV histories, your Danny tanners and things like that. Ones could be your Don drapers, mola.
[01:06:33] Speaker C: White, bad men of television.
[01:06:34] Speaker A: Let's do some practice. Let's do some practice.
[01:06:36] Speaker C: Yeah, I don't know. I mean, we could just pick a random episode and just see if this thing works or not.
[01:06:42] Speaker A: Yeah, let's do.
[01:06:44] Speaker C: Well, let's do it this way. Why don't each one of us thinks of a number? Because there's three of us and there's three digits in a season and episode count. Why don't we figure, okay, I've got my number.
[01:06:59] Speaker A: Got to be the most convoluted way to choose an episode. I got it, too.
[01:07:03] Speaker C: All right, ready, set, go. Three, six, two.
[01:07:08] Speaker B: Because it sounds like six.
[01:07:09] Speaker C: Oh, nice. Good old six. Really reliable number there. Wait, it looks like there's no episode. Season three, episode 62. It doesn't go that high.
[01:07:21] Speaker A: Do 26.
[01:07:23] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, there we go. Season three, episode 26. How they met.
[01:07:27] Speaker A: Let's go all watch the episode. Give it a.
[01:07:29] Speaker C: We don't need to do that. We don't need to do that. Alex, you've seen this one before, right? You said you just binged this.
[01:07:37] Speaker B: Yeah, but I binged all of them. I think this is the one where Ray and Deborah talk about how they meet.
[01:07:44] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, I know this one.
[01:07:46] Speaker C: But there's going to be more to that. Oh, yeah. I think I saw know. I think I remember most of it, but this was the episode I was watching that got cut off when sully landed that plane on the.
[01:07:59] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:07:59] Speaker C: So I don't have all the information, but I think I have enough to make a rating.
[01:08:04] Speaker B: All right, so why don't I start then?
[01:08:06] Speaker C: Yeah, go ahead.
[01:08:07] Speaker B: So let's see if we get this right in this episode. Most of it takes place in the past, which is just a little confusing, which I always hate in my entertainment, but whatever. So it's hard to justify. Do you think we should. Should we rank Ray on how he's in the past or the present, I.
[01:08:30] Speaker A: Think we should pass because it's the majority of the episode.
[01:08:33] Speaker B: Yeah, the present, there's like nothing really like he just talks with Deborah and it's nice.
In the past, I feel know he's he. I relate to him in the sense that he really has to get strong armed into doing asking Deborah out, which is then, you know, once they go out. I don't like that he canceled without talking to her. He was just embarrassed, basically just getting dragged on all fours into this.
Ray, I think this is a very appropriate start to their relationship. I think Ray really set the tone here for what was going know become of this marriage, which is, I think, a very mid tier husband at best. I'm going to give him a clean.
[01:09:31] Speaker A: Oh, I'm sorry, Adam.
[01:09:32] Speaker C: Oh, no, please.
We'll figure out like a consistent order to do this in every can and.
[01:09:39] Speaker B: Then we'll never change.
[01:09:40] Speaker C: Really. Why don't you go ahead, Mike?
[01:09:42] Speaker A: I don't know if I'm going to be as harsh on Ray here as Alex is. I thought he was cute this episode. I thought he was know he didn't do anything bad. He saw a woman naked accidentally. And sure he was awkward about it, but I think it was not malicious. He made a mistake. He tried his best to make sure that she wasn't embarrassed. Now, it backfired a little bit by accidentally making her feel self conscious. But I think that was not never his intention, that was never his long game. That wasn't anything like that. I think that he did good. I think that he actively tried to woo this girl and make her feel special. I'm going to give him much more than a five.
I'm going to give him a seven and a half because I think he was good. I don't think that he did anything wrong.
Screw it. Make it an eight. I'm giving him eight. I'm going to start strong.
[01:10:39] Speaker C: Wow.
[01:10:39] Speaker A: I think I'm going to be the optimistic one. I'm going to give him an eight.
[01:10:42] Speaker B: Wow.
[01:10:43] Speaker C: Pretty wide difference there. I mean, we'll refine the scale, obviously, and make it very scientific. I'm sure there's like measurement professors at Limbrook University we could consult.
For me, I kind of feel like he was a pretty benign presence in this episode.
It is very in character for Ray to kind of stumble into a relationship, to be incredibly dense and not pick up on any signals.
Honestly, to hit a woman with a futon seems pretty on brand for Ray as well.
But other than canceling, which Alex brought up and is a great point.
What did he do wrong in this episode? You can't blame him for seeing Deborah. I mean, you can, but it wasn't really. It was an honest mistake. Yeah.
And honestly, Deborah, clearly, you know, wasn't a deal breaker for her. So I got to give him a decent score, I think. Because if this sequence of events doesn't happen, they don't get married.
I know that's like, you could say that about any flashback. Like, it has to happen for us to end up this way. But I'm closer to Mike. I think I'm not going to give him so much because what did he really do? He delivered a futon, so I guess that's an extra point. And he did it.
[01:12:16] Speaker A: He didn't even make it.
[01:12:17] Speaker C: It wasn't loose. Yeah. Although, to be fair, Gianni was the one who put the frame together and tightened it. In the present, we do get him sort of teasing Ali about Daniel, the boy at school who's going to be coming over.
I want to give him a little bit for that. So I'm going to give him a seven, I think. Because I thought on the whole, he did a pretty good job, but it's not a boundary breaking performance for sure.
[01:12:44] Speaker A: Okay, let me run these numbers real quick.
[01:12:46] Speaker C: What should we do? Should we do, like, the median or like, the standard deviation or the mode or.
[01:12:53] Speaker A: Adam, you're overthinking it. We're going to call it a nice, even 6.7 for this episode.
[01:12:58] Speaker C: We're going to do a 6.7 on these numbers.
[01:13:01] Speaker A: We're just going to call it a 6.7 on these numbers. Yeah. We're going to put them all together. How did three.
[01:13:06] Speaker C: Oh, that's called the average. Right?
[01:13:09] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:13:10] Speaker C: Okay. All right. You said 6.7.
[01:13:14] Speaker A: Yeah. I think that feels about right. I think this is a good strategy.
[01:13:18] Speaker C: I don't know.
That doesn't really seem right to me. But we'll work on it. We'll figure it out.
[01:13:24] Speaker A: Okay. We'll get.
[01:13:26] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah, totally.
[01:13:27] Speaker A: Yes. That's how we did it.
[01:13:29] Speaker B: Wow. What a coincidence.
[01:13:31] Speaker C: That is actually the way it is a coincidence. That's the way that the Paramount executives came up with their version of the barone. It's a true case of parallel thought. So we can't get you on that one.
All right, well, Mike.
[01:13:45] Speaker B: Well, thank you, Mike.
[01:13:46] Speaker C: Thank you. I think we have everything we need.
[01:13:49] Speaker B: So please step outside while I talk with my colleague about what we're going to do.
[01:13:54] Speaker A: Sawyer, you'll never guess I beat him.
[01:13:57] Speaker C: All right, Bill?
I think we're going to go for the 6.5 million and the restraining order, right? I mean, we know this judge. Anything we put in front of him is pretty much because we are doing that pilot with this judge for CBS.
[01:14:17] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, it pains me to admit, but I think so. And there's nothing else we really want out of this.
[01:14:24] Speaker C: Think, uh. I think the executives at Paramount are going to be very happy with this.
All right, let me just get out my phone and I'll text Mr. Moonvez. And I'm just going to go look.
[01:14:38] Speaker B: Out the window for no apparent reason.
[01:14:40] Speaker C: Did you do this? Did you open the peak? I don't remember downloading the peacock.
[01:14:45] Speaker B: I think it just.
[01:14:46] Speaker C: I can't close it. What the fuck? What's going on?
[01:14:49] Speaker B: Oh my God.
[01:14:50] Speaker C: Playing season four, episode one of everybody loves Raymond. What the fuck is.
[01:14:54] Speaker B: It's not just there. Look outside on every building.
[01:14:58] Speaker C: It's on that billboard.
They got a lot of blimps in this town. Jesus Christ.
[01:15:03] Speaker B: Look, the stop signs are even playing.
[01:15:05] Speaker C: I hear it in the waiting room. Really dangerous. Mike. Mike, can you get back in here for a second?
[01:15:12] Speaker A: All right, so you guys ready to give up yet or should I plead the fifth some more?
[01:15:17] Speaker C: Mike, what is happening? Why is season four, episode one of everybody loves Raymond, playing on everything right now? What the fuck is going job? Yeah, the boom job. Yes.
[01:15:32] Speaker A: That'S on the everybody loves Raymond networking system. The Elrs.
[01:15:37] Speaker C: Elrns.
[01:15:39] Speaker A: The Elrns. Yeah, that's it.
[01:15:41] Speaker C: Elronds.
[01:15:41] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:15:42] Speaker C: Elrond named it after fucker from Scientology.
[01:15:46] Speaker A: We named it after the fucker from Lord of the Rings.
[01:15:50] Speaker C: Interesting. Yeah, that too, because I'm in Scientology. But we can talk about that later. I'll give you. Do you want to take a personality test?
[01:15:58] Speaker A: You live in a world of delusion. But regardless, this right here is our system. How else are we going to make sure that every Limbrook citizen is able to watch the episode?
[01:16:17] Speaker C: Yeah. Is this monetized? Do you have this? You got ads. Do you play?
[01:16:21] Speaker A: No, it's paid by the taxes of Lynbrook, actually.
[01:16:25] Speaker C: Really? Well, Bill, if we. If we were to buy this system, we could put ads throughout every episode that they're playing. I hear what you could put. We could put other things and we could put Yellowstone on it.
And Yellowstone.
[01:16:44] Speaker B: All right, follow my lead on this. I have an idea. All right, Mike, we've come to an agreement.
You're going to take this one.
We will drop the charges.
[01:16:58] Speaker A: Knew it.
[01:16:58] Speaker B: You owe us nothing new. It but in exchange, you will give us the town of Lindbrook. And you'll have to change your name. Yeah, we know you know the mayor. So you just get him to sign over the town.
[01:17:14] Speaker A: Just to be clear, to get us out of this lawsuit, you're going to Schitt's Creek, Lynbrook, you're going to buy Limbrook for yourselves. And we just got to change our name away from everybody loves everybody loves Raymond.
[01:17:26] Speaker C: Yes.
We want this thing that puts thing on everybody's stuff. So we can put ads on and just the town as a whole and sell. We'll sell an ad free plan. Like if people want to know, ad free on their houses.
[01:17:39] Speaker A: I got one additional condition.
[01:17:41] Speaker C: What?
[01:17:42] Speaker A: I need a date with Margaret.
[01:17:45] Speaker C: That's up to Margaret.
[01:17:47] Speaker B: She's thinking.
[01:17:48] Speaker A: She's thinking very hard.
[01:17:50] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Her hands moving off of the steno Sterno.
Little thumbs up. That's a shaky thumbs up.
[01:17:59] Speaker A: All right, you guys, you got a deal. Put her there.
[01:18:03] Speaker C: All right.
[01:18:03] Speaker B: All right. Just get the mayor to sign this and.
[01:18:05] Speaker A: Oh, no problem. No problem. Hey, Alex.
[01:18:08] Speaker B: Hey, Mike.
[01:18:09] Speaker A: Hey, I need you to sign this.
[01:18:11] Speaker C: Okay, Alex, we got to get the kids out of the kitchen. The crescent rolls are getting too big and Emerald is pissed.
[01:18:17] Speaker A: Not only, you know, else. What else we got to do? We got to move.
[01:18:20] Speaker C: What?
[01:18:20] Speaker B: What?
[01:18:21] Speaker C: Mike, we're in the middle of one of our classic wacky adventures. We got hot tub time machine.
[01:18:28] Speaker B: Well, first of all, that's not up to you to decide. That's up for me to decide.
[01:18:31] Speaker A: Looky here, buddy.
[01:18:33] Speaker C: The fuck is that?
[01:18:34] Speaker A: We are out of the lawsuit. And I got a date with a hot stenographer. And also, we got to change the name of the podcast. We kind of sold Limbrook into indentured servitude forever.
[01:18:45] Speaker C: You sold the what the fuck is Lynbrook plus?
[01:18:48] Speaker A: That's the name of our town.
[01:18:51] Speaker B: How did they already change the sign?
[01:18:54] Speaker C: Until next, why is Yellowstone playing?
Oh, no. They're using my preferences for the ads. It's discovy for prep everywhere.
I thought I was free of this.
[01:19:06] Speaker B: Have no power. I don't like this.
[01:19:08] Speaker A: I don't understand.
[01:19:09] Speaker C: Crescent Rolls, emerald.
[01:19:12] Speaker A: All that is the reset town of Lindbrook. Plus, together, everybody loves Raymond.
[01:19:22] Speaker C: And we love you.
[01:19:24] Speaker A: Love you.
Thanks for listening.
